Wayfair pictures for dining room

This gotta be long so if you dont mind reading till the end, i would appreciates it.
I (24F) grew up very close to my cousins. One of my cousin (25M), we will call him Ben, was a very nice and respectful person. especially towards his parents. he is very obedient and his parents are great too (his dad is wealthy, has a heart condition and Ben was always there to take care of his father, this is an important info as the story progresses). he had a girlfriend (Wendy, fake name) of 7 years and we all love the girlfriend. we see her as a part of a family that she is included in every family gatherings and such. their relationship has ups and downs but thats just how normal relationship is. until last year around August, where Wendy found Ben was being distant. Wendy is particularly close to me so she vent to me about all of this. she said that Ben would looked “dead” like his eyes doesnt have emotion. he started to be very rude to his mother. his mom could simply asked him if he had eat something and he would snap with something like “why do you care about my life?”. it was not Ben at all. soon his entire family caught up w his new personality. he cut off his old friends, he locked himself in his room, and oy goes out to his new friend group. his focus on things has changed too. you could be talking to him but it seems like his head is somewhere else. i was in another state when i heard all of this until i met him for the first time after so long around Nov last year. and thats when i witnessed his changes. he is no longer friendly. and barely talk to us.
on Dec, he asked for a “break” from Wendy. she is obviously sad and hurted by the sudden decision. but she respected it as she wants to understand him. Wendy is the closest to him so she has assumed he is going through some stress from the way he has been acting. when Wendy asked how much time he needed to be alone, he just told her “you dont need to have an expectation. don’t wait for me”. it sounds like he is letting her go by that sentence alone so Wendy just painfully move on w her life. after a couple of weeks, we found out that he is dating a 6 years older, divorced woman, with two kids.
theres nothings wrong with dating a divorcees, the concern thing is that he has completely changed to be a different person. when his dad confronted him about this, tried to talk to him nicely and calm, he would snap and scream at his dad. it was very unusual to see him this way. he then moved out and stay w the girl. before he left he told his dad that he would never return, and that he chooses this girl over his family. his dad just told him if he chooses the girl over family then dont expect to receive the family wealth . i dont know the full story but i know that he never went back after that, but for some reason knows when his family arent home and would try to steal his dad’s money. his dad has to change all the locks and put a camera in their living room. we soon found out that he has been supporting this woman w her two kids, paying their rent etc.
cut to recently his dad passed away. he received two heart attacks. before he died he did expressed how much he misses his son, blaming himself for being a bad parent, thinking about all the possible reason why his son turned his back on him.. the last thing he said to my dad while crying was “where did i go wrong. i thought i raised him well”. and he passed less than 6hours after that.
Ben miraculously showed up during the funeral. but i personally cant stand looking at him. if i have to judge myself, he doesnt have any regrets and its like his mind is empty. his eyes is emotionless and evil. he only showed up to save some face. the only moment where you can see him showing regret, guilt and pain was when he saw his dad’s body. once its out of sight, its out of mind. but during that time, none of us cares about him anymore. as everyone is very sadden by the pass of our favorite father, uncle, and a male figure.
after the funeral ended, he went back to the girl and has never be seen again. his mother was left alone. after the funeral she expresses how unfair life is. in her words “how bad is it God wants to put me down? i lost my son now i have lost my only supporter, my husband”.
people, and i mean plenty of people been telling us he might be under some love spell, but we dont know how to feel about that.
i honestly have no words. i hope Ben live with regret and guilt for his entire life.
tl;dr: ben is a what you would call a good kid. had a long term gf of 7 years. very sweet to his family. then he broke things off w his gf and told his family he choose to be w a divorced woman. his dad passed from a heart attack and Ben doesn’t seems to be sad about it. after funeral he is back w the other woman. leaving his mom alone.

Hello! I am visiting a friend in Germany from the US and I want to bring a gift for her 5 year old daughter. Any ideas on what girls at that age would like? I initially thought of American picture books but I was told she has a bunch of those already, and legos aren't American so I'm out of ideas. Thank you!

Ive seen some discourse recently on pseudoscience and misinformation on this sub.
I do think its important to maybe flag recommendations to try alternative approaches, and make sure people understand that any treatment (conventional or not) carries risks and may have contraindications with other medicines.
That said, sharing an experience is not misinformation. Is it quantitative? Hell no. Is it pseudoscience? Hell no. Someone's real experience is actual, real information. If anecdotal experiences are pseudoscience, then like half of every sociology study ever published (i.e. qualitative research) is pseudoscience. Case studies? pseudoscience. Even in biological science journals there are literal subsections for findings that are interesting but for which we dont have a crazy amount of evidence for. I am a biologist that studies diseases in wildlife. and if it werent for wildlife rehabbers publishing these very qualitative papers saying "uhh this animal as X symptoms, has X parasites, and its kinda weird!!!"-- I wouldnt be able to do the quantitative science that I do. This idea is obviously part of a much larger debate, and qualitative science very often gets shit on-- its nothing new. a disclaimer-- i am not equating a peer reviewed qualitative study with someone's reddit post. but we can take them in as information, maybe some grains of salt.
slapping a pseudoscience/misinformation label on someone's experience is not just unnecessary and invalidating, it isnt even scientific. The scientific method literally starts with observation. That, essentially, is what these cases are. In fact, I have seen literal peer reviewed pubs that are publishing the comments found on reddit. See "Unmet needs discussed on Reddit by women with premenstrual dysphoric disorder".
I could go on and on about this. I just get very frustrated when I see people on this sub invalidating and dismissing others when we are so frequently dismissed by our own doctors. All the while, it is actually possible to value science, hold quantitative research as the gold standard, and still leave room to be caring, thoughtful, kind, and validating to people who are suffering. Honestly, I think those kinds of shitty attitudes of punching down with science and shutting people down point blank are the reason for so much mistrust of scientists. Please dont make my job harder by shutting people down.
For anyone who has been dismissed by medical professionals, family members, random internet people, or otherwise: I feel your pain, I hear you, I love you. Your experience is real, and valid.

I'm a M age 27.
Noticed a painless soft lump in my navel which wasn't there the other day.
It's sort of skin coloured pink but has what looks like a few small crusty white bits on it.
No other symptoms, no pain, no nausea etc and no past health problems or concerns.
Just wondering what you think it might be and whether it's anything serious I might need to worry about.
Can't afford health care for just anything which is why I've not gone straight to a doctor.
Picture in comment!
Thanks!

I tried to force chatGPT to make lore on what the emperor was doing today but it needed some guidance
Can you generate a scenario of what He would have done on the 30th of may 2023?
On the 30th of May 2023, the Emperor of Mankind, known as a being of immense power and wisdom, continues to exert his influence from the depths of the Golden Throne on Terra. Although physically immobile, his psychic presence remains ever watchful and connected to the Imperium.
In the depths of his psychic realm, the Emperor focuses his attention on the countless battles and conflicts raging across the galaxy. His mind delves into the intricate strategies and tactics employed by the forces of the Imperium, guiding his generals and champions in their ongoing war against the forces of Chaos, xenos threats, and internal challenges.
On this particular day, the Emperor's psychic gaze may fall upon a critical campaign taking place on a distant planet, where the Imperial forces are locked in a desperate struggle against a horde of heretical cultists. Sensing the precarious situation and the potential consequences of defeat, the Emperor channels his psychic energy to empower the minds of his loyal Space Marine Chapters, bolstering their resolve and fortifying their defenses.
Simultaneously, the Emperor's psychic presence extends beyond the battlefield. His vast knowledge and foresight enable him to perceive threats to the Imperium before they materialize. On this day, he detects a looming plot by a traitorous Inquisitor seeking to undermine the stability of the Imperium. With his psychic influence, the Emperor subtly manipulates events, planting seeds of doubt and discord among the traitor's followers, ultimately leading to their exposure and downfall.
Amidst these cosmic matters, the Emperor's psychic energy also extends to the spiritual well-being of his faithful subjects. Through dreams and visions, he imparts hope, strength, and guidance to countless individuals across the Imperium, inspiring them to stand strong against the darkness that threatens to engulf them.
While the Emperor's actions on the 30th of May 2023 remain hidden from the eyes of the mundane world, his influence continues to shape the fate of the Imperium, ensuring its survival and fighting against the encroaching forces of chaos and destruction.
User
no. i want you to write what the emperor was doing on the 30th of may 2023, on earth. you need to reailse that the emperor did not leave earth before the bulk of humanity achieved interstellar space flight, so he would have been somewhere on earth living in cognito, perhaps in a suburban existence. paint me a picture of that.
ChatGPT
Apologies for the confusion earlier. In this alternative scenario, we can imagine a mundane day in the life of the Emperor of Mankind on the 30th of May 2023, living in cognito on Earth:
On the 30th of May 2023, the Emperor of Mankind, in his enigmatic guise, resides in a modest suburban neighborhood somewhere on Earth. Masked in an unassuming human form, he goes by a simple name, perhaps John or David, and lives a seemingly ordinary existence to conceal his true identity and immeasurable power.
In this suburban setting, the Emperor inhabits a cozy home filled with books, artifacts, and works of art that reflect his vast knowledge and appreciation for human history. The walls are adorned with paintings depicting ancient battles and noble figures, a nod to his own past and the many conflicts he has witnessed.
As the morning sun casts its gentle glow, the Emperor rises from his slumber, embracing the routines of human life. He prepares breakfast in the kitchen, savoring the aroma of freshly brewed coffee and the simple pleasure of a warm meal. The newspaper rests on the table, a glimpse into the world beyond his secluded existence.
Engaging in the daily activities of a middle-class individual, the Emperor may have a job, perhaps as a university professor or a historian, where he imparts his vast knowledge and wisdom to eager students. With his unparalleled insight, he illuminates the minds of those around him, leaving a lasting impression on their intellectual pursuits.
During lunch breaks, the Emperor finds solace in nearby parks, where he can observe the beauty of nature and engage in quiet contemplation. Underneath a sprawling oak tree, he might immerse himself in ancient texts or pen his own philosophical musings, drawing on his eternal wisdom and insight to decipher the mysteries of the universe.
In the evenings, the Emperor returns to his suburban haven, cherishing moments of tranquility and reflection. He may indulge in hobbies such as painting or playing musical instruments, using these expressive outlets to channel his emotions and connect with the human experience on a profound level.
As the day draws to a close, the Emperor takes solace in the starlit sky, gazing upward with a mixture of nostalgia and longing. Though confined to Earth, his mind transcends the limitations of the physical realm, traversing the vast expanse of the cosmos, keeping a watchful eye over the Imperium he built.
While the world around him remains oblivious to his true nature, the Emperor silently carries the weight of humanity's destiny on his shoulders. His suburban existence, shrouded in anonymity, serves as a necessary refuge, allowing him to bask in the simplicity and fragility of human life while protecting the Imperium from the shadows.
In this quiet suburban existence, the Emperor of Mankind finds purpose and solace, patiently awaiting the time when his presence and guidance will once again be required to lead humanity to its ultimate destiny.
​
Also...
Faction Name: The Cetacean Dominion
Lore: The Cetacean Dominion is an enigmatic race that dwells beneath the depths of the oceans on countless planets across the galaxy. Millennia ago, a group of genetically enhanced dolphins, imbued with psychic powers by an ancient xenos artifact, underwent a mysterious transformation. They evolved into a highly intelligent and technologically advanced species, transcending their aquatic origins.
Driven by a deep sense of curiosity and a desire to protect the oceans they call home, the Cetacean Dominion has developed an impressive civilization within the vast undersea realms. They harness the power of psychic abilities, bioengineering, and advanced technology to maintain their dominion and preserve the delicate balance of marine ecosystems.
Despite their aquatic nature, the Cetacean Dominion has developed unique exosuits and adaptive technology that allows them to venture onto land for brief periods. Their exosuits provide protection, enhanced mobility, and weaponry specifically designed for land-based conflicts. On the battlefield, they employ a combination of psychic powers, advanced energy weapons, and specialized marine creatures bioengineered for warfare.
As a society, the Cetacean Dominion values harmony with nature and the pursuit of knowledge. They seek to uncover ancient secrets hidden beneath the waves and defend their oceanic territories from any threat, be it xenos invaders, chaos forces, or the ravages of pollution and exploitation.
The Cetacean Dominion is led by a council of wise elders, known as the Oracles of the Abyss, who guide their society with their profound psychic abilities and unrivaled wisdom. These oracles communicate with the cosmic energies of the Warp and possess clairvoyant visions of possible futures, aiding their people in making strategic decisions and safeguarding their civilization.
With their advanced technology, psychic mastery, and unwavering determination, the Cetacean Dominion emerges from the depths of the ocean to protect their aquatic realms and fight alongside the other factions in the grim darkness of the 41st millennium.
​
Feel free to generate some more junk lore for me to read please.

Hi, I need some legal advice just to see if I can take legal action against my former employer please.
I worked part time for a healthcare company and spoke to my manager about switching to work in the staff “bank” in a zero hours contract basically to help manage my time with uni. I emailed her originally and she never responded but whilst I was busy at work she spoke to me about it in the kitchen where I was setting up snack for our patients, whilst there was another worker also in there. I was due for a probation review that day so my plan was to ask in the review where there would be a HR rep, to consider my options and see if that’s something I can easily transition to.
During this chat in the kitchen she told me that I’d have to hand in my letter of resignation, resign, wait a month and then reapply for the staff bank as that’s company policy. I expressed my concerns about this as I have to pay student tuition for my course, rent, bills etc and taking a month off before then starting training again would put me at a loss. I wanted to talk about it at the review meeting and gain more of a picture. Bearing in mind as well that I was busy, and another member of staff was just stood there eating their food so it was super uncomfortable and unprofessional from a manager.
I was told I couldn’t wait until the review and if I want to make that transition I need to resign before the review, so on the spot I said yes okay I’ll do that then, and she rushed me into drafting a resignation letter before she left in an hour. I was about to go to a 1:1 so it was all very stressful and rushed as I had no time to sit and properly discuss it and she didn’t even give me the grace of sitting down with me personally to discuss it- so much so she sent me an angry email because she didn’t receive it before she went home because I was doing my fricking job.
Anyway I gave her my letter later that day when she came back and HR emailed me to confirm it, on my letter it explicitly stated that I am not resigning to leave, I am resigning so that I can rejoin the staff bank as I was instructed was the proper way to do it. A couple of shifts later though I heard from the ward clerk that they’re no longer accepting bank applications- basically, I’m out of a job. I emailed HR and they confirmed that’s the case with no further advice or support.
Cut forward a few months and I’ve only just been able to find a job at another company but now I have student tuition telling me that if I don’t pay it all off now I won’t receive my official transcript. I have no money as I haven’t started my new job yet and I can’t pay my tuition or my bills. After the month was up from my last day at the healthcare job I looked and sure enough there was no option to apply. I emailed and never heard back. I appreciate that I chose to resign but had my manager told me they weren’t hiring bank anymore I would never have resigned. Had she let me discuss it in the probation meeting with HR they could’ve told me but she backed me into a corner, with someone else there, whilst I was rushing trying to do my job, and now I might not get my official grade or graduation certificate back.
Can I take any legal action? Sorry for the long message.

Figured people may be interested in knowing how much time it takes to unlock all there is to unlock so far + give some data about the amount of cosmetics available.
I have about 90 hours played. I completed 160 trials, rebirthed 10 times. I got a rebirth trophy for the 1st, 5th and 10th rebirth. There may be more trophies; I suspect the next one will be at 25. Overall I think I unlocked everything after ~130 trials.
Reagent appearance:

• Head: 12 additional heads to unlock; all epic.
• Icon: 44 icons in total. Best one is Mister Daddy.
• Outfit: the 4 legendaries.
• Night vision: 10 goggles in total; 5 rares.
• Esop: 15 total; 4 rares, 4 epics.
• Shirts: 77 total; 32 rares, 14 epics.
• Pants: 78 total; 32 rares, 14 epics. Yes, there are more pants than shirts!

Room customization:
Note: I count the “no item” option in the total.

• Medium item 1/2: 56 excluding rebirth trophies. 11 rares, 3 legendaries.
• Small item 1/2: 75; 6 rares
• Posters: 12; 3 legendaries.
• Wallpaper: 51; 16 rares, 20 epics.
• Floor: 55; 8 rares, 32 epics.
• Bed: 28; 4 rares, 9 epics.
• Sinks, tiles & trims: 15 each.

Data as of 30/05/23.

Hi Everyone, I'll be joining Queen's University Belfast this year in September. I have received an offer today for accommodation from Student Roost (JBH) Bronze En Suite. I just wanted to know if i will have privacy in my room sometime to drink beer and if i will be allowed to call my girlfriend sometime? What will be th good option to stay?

Just some random suggestions on some of the mechanics from someone with a decent amount of game-time. Implementing all of these might be absurd, but some of them I would think are worth consideration. I'm not offering solutions, just starting a discussion.

• Insurance gives you a special marker; Everything in the same container as the marker is then returned as insurance. There is a lot that can be done around the idea of insurance working off of you having to identify, somehow, what needs to be returned while in raid. This could also make PvP more valuable by letting you stash half of the gear of the fight in a big backpack and using your insurance marker, while you carry out the rest.
  
• Make extracting take longer; Every time you see someone running for an extract and they have a 50m lead, it's almost guaranteed they can safely extract before you catch up to them (depending on the sight-lines etc.). This makes it very easy for people to simply run away/ be blissfully unaware of other pmc in the game. If I see someone running for an extract I basically have to either make noise and hope they look at what's going on, or have to do some intentionally awful shooting so they don't get spooked and simply extract, but think they can win the engagement thereby not extracting. This is mostly a problem on urban maps. RUAF roadblock and path to lighthouse are both way too easy for people to just dip out of 2 min into a raid because they want to avoid people. Traditionally the most convenient extracts required something extra (like a red rebel, flare, taxi money) to be used.
  
• Make blacked limbs more punishing; Specifically I'm talking about blacked legs while on painkillers. Currently sprinting away at full speed and jumping around makes your guy moan a bit and take some token amount of damage. Currently an experienced player can med up if he isn't already and take a fight with very little risk, especially against lower-level or less experienced players. By nerfing the mobility of someone on meds with blacked legs to at least not be able to jump, it might encourage newer players to take on more fights if they know their opponent can't swing on them full speed if they legged them.
  
• Enable ghost walking; This is effectively silent movement at almost walking speed, but it drains your leg stamina. If this is an effective way to move short distances without making noise, it would effectively nerf camping. Someone doesn't need to sit dead still in a room to not make noise, because they can try sneaking out, and people engaging an opponent wouldn't have to avoid the area because of someone sitting motionless somewhere. The movement should be slow enough as to not make people do it 24/7, but fast enough that you can peak corners with it. Blacked legs or a broken bone without meds remove this ability.
  

I play primarily for PvP and it's sometimes frustrating how much you need to force it for people to fight you, but I recognize not everyone wants that. I don't think these suggestions will disrupt how you would play if you don't like PvP.

1. "20 Something" by SZA — If you have no idea what you're doing in your twenties, you're definitely not alone. This decade is like a blank slate as you enter adulthood for the first time, which is both exciting and terrifying.
2. "Story Of My Life" by Ant Clemons — Following unconventional dream-like music, acting, or comedy in your twenties can be especially challenging as we are all constantly under pressure to find stability in our careers. Your twenties are the time to take a risk and follow your passion, even if it's risky.
3. "24" by sundial — In your twenties, it can be easy to feel left behind because everyone you know is at a different stage of life for the first time. This is the time to remember that everyone is on their own path and to not compare your life to other people that you see on social media.
4. "Don't Tell My Mom" by Reneé Rapp — No one wants to admit that they're struggling and worry about their loved ones, but this added pressure of dealing with stress and anxiety on our own usually just makes it ten times worse.
5. "Love Me More" by Sam Smith — We have heard the term "self-love" all our lives, but in our twenties, we realize how important that practice is when navigating the unknown. Self-love can be anything that makes you feel good about yourself, and practicing it constantly allows you to be in the headspace to succeed in this decade of life.
6. "Best Days" by Alessia Cara — It's easy to forget that when you're in your twenties, you are still young! There are so many great life moments to come, with some of your best days ahead.
7. "Landslide" by Fleetwood Mac — Our twenties are the beginning of adulthood, where we really say goodbye to our childhood selves. Though realizing that we will never be kids again can be hard, we can still bring elements of those younger versions into adulthood.
8. "golden years" by Christian French — Our twenties are heavily romanticized by the mainstream media in movies, TV, ads, you name it. We are told that these are our "golden years" where we should always be having fun and achieving, but that is a lot of pressure to put on a decade that is known to be unpredictable. Our "golden years" can look different and still be just as valid.
9. "Twenty One" by Khalid — When you're truly on your own, it's all too easy to rely on others to keep you grounded and happy; after all, that's what the first twenty years of your life were all about. But there's a flip side to that trap that's so easy to fall into: You, and only you, are in charge of your own happiness. As intimidating as that sounds, it can also be a powerful realization.
10. "Chaotic" by Tate McRae — Not every friendship is meant to last a lifetime, and that's okay! In our twenties, we often find ourselves clinging to old friendships, firstly because they are familiar, and secondly, because we believe anything is better than being alone. This decade is a time to figure out what we value most in our friendships and set aside relationships that no longer serve us.
11. "Breakaway" by Kelly Clarkson — If you grew up in a small town, the idea of starting your adulthood in the same place can be somewhat unappealing. It's important to always acknowledge where you come from but to also be unafraid to try something new.
12. "Good Thing" by Zedd & Kehlani — Being "good on your own" is harder said than done, but once you find your independence, you'll be unstoppable from your twenties on!
13. "Fake Smile" by Carlie Hanson — We're all guilty of trying to put on a mask to hide how we're really feeling. Whether it's hiding your nerves at your first job or wearing that fake smile around your friends.
14. "jealous of my friends" by Bea Miller — Being jealous of your friends is a universal feeling for the twenty-somethings. Social media can make it even harder when everyone is showing off their personal wins, but realizing that others doing well has nothing to do with your journey is crucial.
15. "pride.is.the.devil" by J. Cole and Lil Baby — Learning to check your ego in your twenties is important because pride can often get in the way of achieving your goals.
16. "Seasons" by Madison Ryann Ward — Your twenties are a learning season of life. Not every part of your twenties will be a happy season, but it's important to find ways to stay present as life changes.
17. "Changes" by Justin Bieber — While transitioning from your early twenties to your mid-twenties, you can feel the shifts in your mindset, decision-making, and thought processes as you move through the world. Acknowledging those changes is important because you are growing!
18. "Best Thing I Never Had" by Beyoncé — Sometimes what we think we want in our twenties is not what we actually need. At times when things don't happen as you planned, it can be difficult to move forward, because you already have a picture painted in your mind. But the #1 phrase of your twenties should be "everything happens for a reason," because it usually works out better in the end.
19. "Eastside" by benny blanco, Halsey, and Khalid — Adulting in your twenties is a lot of pressure. From taxes, to rent, and health insurance, I mean everything costs money. On top of that newly added pressure of providing for yourself, you have to simultaneously juggle all of your emotions as relationships fail and the world around us changes.
20. "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield — Your twenties are the beginning of your chapter of adulthood! You and only you are in charge of how your story unfolds.
21. "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus — Sometimes we all just need some motivation and a taste of childhood. In your twenties, it's important to remember that there will always be setbacks and difficulties, but learning to navigate them in a healthy way is how you will grow into the best version of yourself.

Link to article

LONG POST AHEAD
Its gonna be months before I can get any kind of mental help (there's a long wait time, apparently) so right now all I can do is sit and rot with my thoughts And I CANNOT stop thinking about DPD. So I thought, hey, while im waiting, lets get other opinions.
I can't tell if this is the missing puzzle piece, if this is what has been Wrong with me this whole time
I have diagnosed GAD and Autism. For the first 12 years of my life, I lived in a neglectful home. Dad (who is also autistic and socially awkward) is distant, mother was an alcoholic who spent her time passed out on the couch
I do not remember my childhood, those are the only facts I know. At 12 years old I was taken out of that house to live with my sister, who became my guardian. I lived there until I was 22.
My sister was both abusive and overly protective. Would get worried if I went out when it was dark or if I bought stuff she didnt know about, while also screaming in my face every day about how useless I am and how she hates living with me lol
I dont remember much of my teen years either, so I dont know when it started. But for as long as I can remember I've had this ingrained thought that I cannot care for myself, I need other people to care for me. If I were ever alone, I would die
It was pretty much drilled into my head for years too, by the people I lived with. I lived like a child until I was 22. Being talked down to, constantly ordered (not asked) to do chores, having my entire life dictated by my sister, having to ask to do things like go to the corner shop
Being autistic, and also nonverbal, and also 5'0 with a babyface, I went through school with everyone treating me like a 12 year old even at like, 17. At home I would also be treated like im mentally 12
I guess it got so drilled into my head that along the way I just accepted this. I believed I couldnt fend for myself if I didnt have my guardians, I believed I was lower than other people. I believed I was mentally 12. I was a doormat in that house, I would be screamed at for every little thing and I wouldnt say a word. For a whole decade, I lived like that
Whatever I wanted to do, Did Not Matter. What everyone else wanted me to do was what mattered. There was only obeying, no arguing
So here's what caused me to believe I may have DPD. I found someone online. We became friends, we talked every day. I developed a crush. She was very gentle and understanding when nobody else in my life was. She would make sure Im okay, she would reassure me its not my fault.
Whenever I accidentally hurt myself I would show her immediately, because she would comfort me and tell me how to look after the wounds
Little things like her showing me how to open an umbrella felt almost euphoric. Sometimes I felt the urge to purposefully dumb myself down, to pretend I didnt know things so other people would care for me and show me (Most of the time I just genuinely didnt know how to do said things lol, but I would sometimes take advantage and exaggerate)
I developed separation anxiety. I would get severely anxious whenever she was offline for long periods of time. I had a HUGE fear of abandonment (and I couldnt figure out where this came from, because nobody had abandoned me before) to the point where it was debilitating. I would ruminate on these thoughts of abandonment all day every day. She would have to reassure me she loves me and wouldn't leave a LOT. She didnt mind doing it. She has mental illnesses too, she understands
I was so clingy, she was all I could think about. I was open about my separation anxiety and clinginess.
I relied on her, the thought of losing her was my biggest fear. I fully believed I could not live without her.
She became what I jokingly called a "budget caretaker", and I panicked about this a lot even when she repeatedly reassured me she didn't mind.
Obviously, while she wasnt dependent on me like I was on her, the love wasnt one sided. If she was ever upset I would drop everything to listen and be there for her. I spent a LOT of money I worked hard to make from art on birthday gifts for her. I would send a good morning message every day and tell her how much I love her.
Everything I did, I did for her. She tells me she likes how I look in certain clothes, I get that stuck in my head and I will impulsively buy more, Just to take pictures in them to show her. I have to tell her everything, what Im doing at any moment, from eating to drawing to tidying. Everything I did was worthless if she wasnt there to witness it
Things like her off-handedly suggesting a get a desk for my room, and me months later being so excited to show her I followed her suggestions despite her probably not remembering she suggested it
She suggested food to buy that would be good for me, and I bought it just to show her I bought it, and I never ate it. If we disagreed on anything, I would panic. We usually have the same opinions on everything so in the rare case we didnt it felt like my world was ending. I would back down, seeing her opinion as more important, and I would immediately try to turn it into my opinion, changing my feelings on the topic to fit hers
I never once saw her get angry or upset with me, but it was one of my biggest fears
The anxiety attacks Id have over the thought of her leaving me left me miserable and suicidal. I hated being this way. I hated that she had to witness that. I hated that I always needed her to look after me.
This weird people pleaser attitude is something ive always had. I chalked it down to an inferiority complex, inherently seeing other people's opinions as worth more than mine. Or assuming everyone around me is smarter, and if I had a clashing opinion I was the black sheep and I had to change it to fit in
Changing opinions is something I can do easily, unless its something im VERY passionate about, or something that will Never be up for debate (abuse, bigotry, etc). I also chalked this up to me being gullible? Im not sure
It's a bit weird, because with this online friend it's the first time I'd ever felt equal to another human being. I didnt feel like she was above me, but also I would want her to look after me? In times of anxiety or distress I'd feel smaller and she would comfort me, and it made the distress worth it
Once I got bitten by my sisters dog and I genuinely didn't care because my sister was nice to me during that time when she . Did the bare minimum (stop yelling at me, take me to the doctors, be a little nice to me)
I left my sisters house, something I never thought I could do. I did it because my online friend would be proud of me. My separation anxiety worsened that day, because it was such an extreme event I could not be alone without feeling nauseous
The only reason I could leave was because I had my brother, who offered to let me live with him. And my brother immediately became someone who would take care of me. He takes me places I dont feel I can go myself, he takes on responsibilities like my bank account or signing me up for counselling, he makes sure I eat, etc
If I didnt have him, I would've never left my sister.
My online friend cut me off 2 and a half months ago (nothing I did, she cut all her friends off for mental health reasons) and it has been the worst months of my life. I have this constant desperation to get her back, I cannot see myself living a happy life without her. I know she's moved on from me. But I cannot. I feel like I need her. I sit here and wait every day like a lost puppy for her return I sometimes want to find someone else, but the thought of starting over and the thought of it not being her, who I loved with everything I had for over a year, deters me
A little while after she left I had arm and chest pain and fully believed I was having a heart attack (I wasnt). I wasnt anxious because I went to her DMs and told her this and her simply asking "are you ok" filled me with such euphoria that I did not care about The Situation
I can be alone as long as I know I'm not Alone alone. Like, I like being alone in my room as long as my brother is in the house in a different room. Or I can be alone in my room as long as I know that I can talk to people online whenever I want (I have other online friends, but we are not close)
I actually run a Discord server, but I rely on my mods to make decisions and changes, and allow them to do whatever they want. Its a small server and the only active members are friends who would never break the rules or argue, so its easier. But before it was chill like this there were some bumps in the road, where we had to ban some people and I panicked the whole time and just thanked God that my mods were with me because I couldnt handle it on my own
And sometimes I find myself thinking, can I post this in this channel? Is this weird to say? Is this allowed in this server? It never fully connects that its MY server that I OWN
I struggle to make decisions a lot. I'd get yelled at a lot because Id reply "I dont know" for everything and I'd let others decide for me. For example, with dinner. My guardians would make me dinner even at the age of 22, and Id share it with my 7 year old nephew. We lived like there were only a few years between us
OH i just remembered when I was 14 I allowed one of my biggest bullies to become my boyfriend because he became nicer to me and admitted he liked me LMAO
At 17 I had another bf, but I allowed him to bring another person into the relationship even when I didnt really know this person, and we were a poly relationship . I dont remember anything really, I dont remember how we fell apart
The relationship with the online friend I talked about was the very first time I felt wholeheartedly loved. The first time I felt empathy and unconditional love for another person.
For me, I HAVE to have people to talk to at all times. Romantic, platonic, I dont care. Me and this person, we didnt care about labels (well, I did at first, but she didnt, so therefore I didnt either) I need to feel loved and nurtured. I've learned I can get that with very close friendships and I yearn to to be close to people constantly. I need what I had with her back
Another thing ive noticed is that whenever Im alone I pretend people are watching me. I live life as if Im in a video and Im being watched, so therefore what im doing at that moment matters. I chat away to these nonexistent people , acting as if Im recording a video or Im live or something. And even THEN im a people pleaser!!!! I get worried that these nonexistent people will judge what they see on my screen, or will judge what im doing, and I justify it to myself so they wont think im weird
Obviously these people dont exist. There's no voices or anything, I know im not being watched. I know im talking to myself. Its so normal to me that I never considered it until now I also do this to show off hobbies. I love pretending people are watching videos with me of hobbies or interests nobody else would realistically ever give a shit about. Its nice.
I will never be independent. I cannot. The thought of living alone, existing without other people feels like looking in an alternate universe.

Hi! I'm Angel, I'm 23 and I'm an INFJ. Let's see, I don't have anything interesting about me. Well, when I walk into a room and forget what I was supposed to be doing, is normal, everyone experienced that in their life, right? I still watch cartoons, I think a lot of you prefer anime which I don't have a problem with, the first anime I watched was Slam Dunk which was worth it hahaha. Isn't Courage the Cowardly Dog a bit too traumatizing for kids? I remembered watching an episode with a Giant Hamster, and there was this song that goes "It's a small world after all", it scared me so much that I couldn't sleep that night. And the "Return the slab or suffer my curse" episode. The person who created Courage sure hates kids hahaha!
I used to draw or sketch, but I stopped because they said that art doesn't do any good to anyone and it's a useless talent, and I wouldn't go anywhere with it. But I do want to back to doing what I love, even if it's just me sketching something random at some time and day. We can be art mates if you want. I don't have a problem sharing some ideas. I also write, most of them are unwritten. I have a growing collection of books, 3 of them are read but 10 or 12 of them are still unread. It's whenever I enter a bookstore and spot a good book I grab it and go home with it. I procrastinate a lot which might you book lovers out there angry at me right now for not reading my books, I apologize. We can read a book together so I can have some time reading than overthinking about what life is going to throw at me next.
I think... my post is long now and I've said enough. You can dm me if you want to talk and be friends. Bye bye now! Oh! And have a great day or night!

My 20th was on Sunday, and came home from university to spend it with my mother, whom is the only person I live with. My mother and I have always had a strained relationship, reasons I am unsure about.
So, on Sunday night, I got a bit pissed off with myself about something, and she assumed I was pissed off at her. I told her many times that I was not pissed off at her, but she didn't seem to gather that.
Now, when I get frustrated with something I cry because I have emotional problems (explained more later in post) and cannot control this. I have told her many times over the last few years but she always "forgets" and sometimes ridicules me for it. Yes I know I am an adult, but again I cannot control it when it happens.
Anyway, stuff was said, including why I was crying, and I eventually left the room and went to my own room for the night. Later on, she came down and asked if I was taking drugs.
For some context, I was in a car accident as a kid caused by a drunk and high driver, and seriously affected by it. So as you could tell I would be the last person to take drugs. This has, also, affected my emotion regulation.
I was very confused and offended by the question, and said that I wasn't. I knew people who did, but I didn't partake in it. Her reasoning was that my mood "changed very quickly", even though I listed other disorders that can affect emotions and moods (I'm a psych student and finished my second year of my degree). But, she didn't want to hear it.
There was a point that night when she came down and was oddly calm and kept saying that she loved me, that I was safe, and to "switch back". Since I've studied it, it sounded like she thought I had DID, which I do not. But, she did not explain herself and left.
Long story short, with some passing words here and there, I have not talked to her since, apart from saying that she could've approached the conversation better instead of shouting and forcing me on the edge to commit that night. Thankfully I had a friend who managed to talk me down from it.
I have stated many times that I will not be apologising to her as I see I have done nothing wrong. But, AITA?

My 18mo was previously trained with Ferber. We switched her to a floor bed three months before I had her little sister and she was doing great with it.
We had our second and brought her home last week. Since, my 18mo refuses to sleep alone. She just stands at her door and screams until one of us goes to her room.
I’m not sure how to proceed. Should we go back to the crib? She was doing so well in the bed until we brought her sister home. Is this just a temporary phase or does anyone have any tips for training in these circumstances? My husband and I are suffering with no sleep and there’s no way to really split this so anyone gets more sleep. We also have no help outside of us, we’ve already tried.