Judgment Day 2006 (SmackDown)
Date: 21/5/06
Location: US Airways, Phoenix, Arizona
WWE Tag Team Championship:
MNM (c) w/Melina vs Paul London & Brian Kendrick
Cruiserweight Championship:
Gregory Helms (c) vs Super Crazy
United States Championship:
Chris Benoit (c) vs Finlay
The Undertaker vs Mark Henry w/Daivari
(After WrestleMania, Mark Henry and Daivari form an alliance which the World’s Strongest Man wants to make a further statement after taking Batista out of action. Henry targets The Undertaker, brutally attacks him on SmackDown and claims he’s the most dominant individual in the company. Henry challenges Taker to a match at Judgement Day which The Deadman accepts, saying it will be Judgment Day for Mark Henry for the sin he’s committed by attacking him. Mark Henry shockingly wins clean and The Great Khali is nowhere to be seen.)
Bobby Lashley vs Booker T w/Sharmell
(Booker T wins thanks to a distraction from Sharmell.)
Title vs Career Match for the World Heavyweight Championship:
Rey Mysterio (c) vs JBL
(Rey won’t be a jobber bitch to anyone in the build up to this match. Instead, JBL wins a #1 Contender’s Match against Chris Benoit to earn this opportunity for the World Heavyweight Championship. Bradshaw says Rey Mysterio’s win at No Way Out over him was a fluke and he’s that confident of beating Rey Mysterio this time that he’ll even put his career on the line. Rey says that not only will he beat Bradshaw again to keep his title but he’ll finally free the WWE and the fans from the poisonous bully that is JBL. Rey Mysterio retains the championship and beats JBL again to end his career… for now. The show draws to a close with the crowd taunting JBL.)
ECW One Night Stand 2006
Date: 11/6/06
Location: Hammerstein Ballroom, Manhattan, New York, New York
Kurt Angle vs Randy Orton
(Kurt Angle is drafted to ECW which pisses Vince McMahon off to the point he instructs Randy Orton who’s just been drafted to RW to take care of the traitor. Angle wins clean and this is Orton’s punishment for violating the Wellness Policy.)
Tazz vs Jerry Lawler
(Tazz squashes Lawler in 30 seconds.)
Extreme Rules Match for the World Heavyweight Championship:
Rey Mysterio (c) vs Tommy Dreamer
(With ECW back, Paul Heyman challenges Rey Mysterio who was once part of ECW to defend his championship at One Night Stand against one of his guys. Rey accepts and welcomes the challenge from anyone Heyman chooses. Paul Heyman picks the heart and soul of ECW, Tommy Dreamer! Dreamer says while he respects Rey, beating him for the World Championship on ECW’s return is an opportunity he just can’t pass up. Rey tells Dreamer he understands his thinking but he’s not allowing his boyhood dream to end right now. In a very good and brutal encounter, Rey Mysterio wins to retain the World Heavyweight Championship. Both men shake hands after the match with Dreamer raising Rey’s arm.)
Hardcore Match:
Mick Foley vs Edge w/Lita
(The match we got in real life at WrestleMania 22 in real life happens here instead. After costing Edge the WWE Championship at Backlash, Mick Foley says that was just him getting even but he’s not done with Edge. Foley challenges the Rated R Superstar to a Hardcore match at this event which Edge accepts, promising to destroy the Hardcore Legend once and for all. We get that same flaming table spot in a brutal affair. Edge wins clean.)
Hardcore Match:
Sabu vs Terry Funk
(Just to emphasise ECW’s return further, let’s put the two craziest bastards going in a match against one another. Sabu wins in another brutal and bloody affair.)
Extreme Rules Match for the WWE Championship:
John Cena (c) vs Rob Van Dam
(Rob Van Dam tells John Cena in advance when he’s cashing in just like he did in real life. Van Dam tells Cena that he’s cashing in at ECW One Night Stand in a building that he calls home, The Hammerstein Ballroom. In a very back and forth main event with Cena being booed out of the building, Rob Van Dam beats John Cena clean to win the WWE Championship! Edge doesn’t appear in the slightest.)
Vengeance 2006 (Raw)
Date: 25/6/06
Location: Charlotte Bobcats Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Intercontinental Championship:
Shelton Benjamin (c) vs Val Venis
Ric Flair vs Umaga w/Armando Estrada
(Umaga wins clean to remain undefeated although Flair puts up a fight in his hometown.)
WWE World Tag Team Championship:
Carlito & Chris Masters (c) vs Sabu & The Sandman
Kane vs The Big Show
Kurt Angle vs Randy Orton
(Orton cheats to win after hitting a low blow when the referee isn’t looking. Angle leaves the company shortly after.)
D-Generation X vs The Spirit Squad
(Vince McMahon is furious that Triple H has aligned with Shawn Michaels again and says he should never have trusted him. Vince says there will be consequences and at Vengeance, DX will face off against all 5 members of The Spirit Squad. In the build up, DX rip the utter pss out the McMahons by dressing up as them, covering them and The Spirit Squad in sht, saying Vince McMahon loves c*cks etc. Despite the odds being against them, DX win this match in their first official match as a team again.)
WWE Championship:
Rob Van Dam (c) vs John Cena (No Contest)
(After ECW One Night Stand, John Cena says on the night Rob Van Dam was the better man and deserves to be the WWE Champion. Cena then tells Van Dam that he’s invoking his rematch clause at Vengeance. Mr. Monday Night welcomes the challenge, saying it’ll be another day at the office for him and he’ll prove his win at One Night Stand wasn’t a fluke. This match ends in a No Contest after a mysterious man attacks both men. The man is… Edge! Edge then Spears both Cena & Van Dam before holding up the WWE Championship as Vengeance draws to a close.)
Note:
(Mark Henry gets injured in his Judgment Day rematch against The Undertaker on SmackDown although the storyline is going to be that Batista injured Henry when attacking him upon return as part of his revenge after Henry injured him.)
The Great American Bash 2006 (SmackDown)
Date: 23/7/06
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
WWE Tag Team Championship:
Paul London & Brian Kendrick (c) vs The Pitbulls
Cruiserweight Championship:
Gregory Helms (c) vs Chavo Guerrero
The Undertaker vs Daivari
(Teddy Long forces Daivari to compete at The Great American Bash against The Undertaker as The Phenom publicly made it known he wants to get his hands on him for being the brains behind Mark Henry going after him in the first place. The Deadman utterly destroys Daivari here.)
United States Championship:
Chris Benoit (c) vs Finlay
Matt Hardy vs William Regal
Batista vs Mr.Kennedy
World Heavyweight Championship:
Rey Mysterio (c) vs Booker T w/Sharmell
(Booker T wins a Triple Threat Match against Bobby Lashley and Chris Benoit to earn this opportunity. Booker T says that it’s been 3 years since he was the World Heavyweight Champion and promises that the rut without the gold is coming to an end. Booker also says that someone has to end that little troll Rey Mysterio’s fairytale run and warns Rey it’s going to be him. Rey simply wants to continue his run and prove that he’s not a fluke of a champion every single time he gets the chance. Rey Mysterio retains the title via a roll up which Booker T can’t believe and shouts to Rey that he isn’t finished with him.)
SummerSlam 2006
Date: 20/8/06
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Extreme Rules Match for the Inaugural ECW Championship:
Sabu vs The Sandman vs Tommy Dreamer
(Paul Heyman announces the return of the ECW Championship and says the new ECW Champion will be crowned at SummerSlam involving 3 individuals who are the heart and soul of the brand. Sandman wins the championship in a crazy, bloody and fun opener.)
Women’s Championship:
Mickie James (c) vs Lita
United States Championship:
Finlay (c) vs Chris Benoit
Ric Flair vs Randy Orton
(Randy Orton targets his former Evolution teammate as his next Legend to decimate. Orton says that Ric Flair is nowadays nothing but a dumb, deluded old man with his best days behind him and he’s willing to put him down for good. Flair says Orton just like in Evolution is still a cocky, arrogant little brat who needs to be taught a lesson. Randy Orton wins clean with an RKO.)
Intercontinental Championship:
Shelton Benjamin (c) vs Kane
D-Generation X vs Vince McMahon, Shane McMahon & The Big Show
(Vince McMahon recruits The Big Show to help him take down DX. Vince says that DX is a disease to him and his company and that Big Show is the key to helping him destroy them. Big Show says that DX can try and make jokes all they want but he, Vince and Shane will be the last ones laughing. DX tell Vince he can hide behind that 500 knucklehead Big Show all they want, when the jokes are put to the side they’ll be kicking their ass and ending this at SummerSlam. DX win after Triple H pins Vince to end the feud between DX & The McMahons.)
Batista vs Bobby Lashley
(Bobby Lashley challenges Batista in order to prove he deserves to be here. Bobby feels challenging the best SmackDown has to offer is his best way to get noticed. Batista accepts Bobby’s challenge but tells him he’ll be introduced to the big leagues the hard way. Batista wins clean although Lashley takes him to the limit which Batista respects to the point he shakes Bobby Lashley’s hand after the match.)
World Heavyweight Championship:
Rey Mysterio (c) vs Booker T w/Sharmell
(Booker T challenges Rey Mysterio to face him again at the biggest party of the summer. Rey accepts and claims just like he did to JBL, he’ll beat Booker T again to prove that his win at The Great American Bash wasn’t a fluke. During the match, the referee is unconscious and Chavo Guerrero comes down to the ring in aid of his friend Mysterio. Chavo gets a steel chair and hits… Rey! With one of the hardest chair shots you’ll see and Booker T is utterly stunned. The referee regains consciousness and Booker T covers Rey Mysterio to win the World Heavyweight Championship!)
WWE Championship:
Rob Van Dam (c) vs Edge w/Lita vs John Cena
(Edge says he did what he did at Vengeance because not only does he hate John Cena and doesn’t want him touching the WWE Championship in the slightest but Rob Van Dam also holds the damn thing he wants. Cena says Edge has only delayed the inevitable which is him regaining his spot as the man and he now wants the chance to do it in his hometown meanwhile RVD tells them both that if they want his title, he welcomes the challenge. As a result, a Triple Threat Match is booked. Edge wins the championship by pinning Rob Van Dam after Lita hands him a pair of brass knuckles.)
Notes:
(Jeff Hardy returns to the WWE the night after SummerSlam although he doesn’t confront Edge.)
(Rob Van Dam and Sabu are suspended for violating the Wellness Policy.)
(Chavo Guerrero costs Rey Mysterio his rematch for the World Heavyweight Championship on the SmackDown after SummerSlam.)
And that’s part 42 over and done with guys! I hope you enjoyed what I brought to the table and of course love the fact I kept The Great Khali so far away from The Undertaker 😂 anyways, I’ll be back on Thursday to cover part 43 where we’ll see Trish Stratus retire, John Cena and Edge take their rival to a new level and at Survivor Series we’ll have Brand Warfare which ends up getting Extreme 👀 stay tuned!

++I regret to say, we have lost control of the system to these invaders.++
The words hung in the air of the command centre, literally stunning those present. It was almost impossible to imagine. The image of Quinn on the screen continued.
++I’m pulling back to the jump limit, to preserve whats left of my forces. The repair ships can rendezvous with us there, and contact temporary repairs to enable us to get to Ti’an for proper repair work.++
Himdo took some time to react, as the enormity of what the fleet-master was saying sank in. When he responded, he spoke with A tone that was equal parts surprise and indignation
“You’re abandoning the system?! We cant just let these humans have a sector capital! Its unprecedented!“
Due to the distances involved, their was a significant delay fore the fleet-master responded.
++The humans ALREADY have the sector capital, My lord. I am in no position to stop them. ++ Quinn countered. ++We need to fall back at Ti’an, wait for the Battle fleet to arrive from the Core, and then retake the system. Parbat is lost.++
Dar’cy reared onto his true-feet, bringing him to his full height
. “We may have lost the orbitals, but we still hold the surface. Unless they are willing to destroy their prize, they will have to dig us out!”
“They may well decided to do just that, Corps-lord” Dal’ton said. “Those ships have more than enough firepower to raze most of the planet if they chose to, but they lack the transports needed to occuy the system. Only the Palace is fortified enough to survive.”
Himdo shifted his weight slightly as he was reminded of the weakness of the planetary defences. The Central Command, ever-paranoid about rebellion in the Frontier (which was not without cause, considering Imperial history) did not allow much fortification of worlds in the frontier. Normally, only the governor’s palace was properly fortified against orbital attack. The rest of the world was at the mercy of whoever held the orbitals, and when the Imperial Navy was the only force around, it made sense.
“Incoming transmission form the Human fleet!” a comms tech shouted, and the terran admiral appeared on a screen, and began to talk again. The translation text indicated it was a repeat of their demands to release any human prisoners, or “suffer the consequences”.
Himdo turned and advanced towards the camera pickup
“You do understand what your facing, don’t you? The Great and Bountiful Empire is more than a thousand worlds! We will not be dictated too by some upstart species that doesn’t recognise how overmatched it is!“
The terran grunted, the translator labelling it as mirth.
++wiː ɑːr əˈbaʊt tuː teɪk kənˈtrəʊl ɒv jɔːr ˈɔːbɪtl speɪs ænd dɪˈmɒlɪʃ ˈɛvri ˈsteɪʃᵊn ɪn ˈɔːbɪt. duː juː ˈrɪəli wɒnt tuː luːs ɔːl ðæt ˈəʊvə jɔː praɪd? ++
“They ask if we are really willing to loose the orbital industry for our pride” Mer’es, the xenologist, dutifully translated
“Tell them we do not have any prisoners, they were taken further into our great realm.” Himdo lied.
The human nodded in agreement as he heard the message.
++ðæts tuː bæd. ɪn ðæt keɪs, pliːz pɑːs ɒn tuː huːˈɛvə dʌz hæv ðɛm ðeɪ kæn ɡɛt ðɪs ˈsɪstəm bæk wɛn ðeɪ ɡɪv ʌs ˈaʊə ˈpiːpl bæk.++
“They say they will hold this system until we return their people” Mer’es read out.
Himdo reared up in anger…then forced himself back down, and spoke with a tone of measured anger.
“Tell them anything they do here will be repaid a hundredfold onto their people”
The face of the human was hard as stone, his eyes as cold as the depths of interstellar space.
++juː ɑː ˈwɛlkəm tuː traɪ, bʌt ðæt wɪl nɒt hɛlp juː naʊ.++
“He says we can try, but it wont help us now” Mer’es said as the human admiral carried on
++ aɪ ˈɒfə juː ə ʧɔɪs. juː kæn səˈrɛndə, ænd ˈɔːdə jɔː fliːt tuː rɪˈmeɪn ɪn ˈsɪstəm æt ðɪs ləʊˈkeɪʃᵊn. ɪn rɪˈtɜːn, wiː wɪl lɛt juː ɪˈvækjueɪt jɔːr ˈɔːbɪtl ˈɪnfrəˌstrʌkʧə wɪˈðaʊt ˌɪntəˈfɪərəns, ænd liːv ɪt ɪnˈtækt. rɪˈzɪst, ænd wɪl klɪər ˈɔːbɪtl speɪs ænd ˈskaʊə ðə ˈplænɪt ++
“He offers is a choice, surrender and order the fleet to this location” A image of the system flashed up, a location not far form Parbat orbit highlighted, as Mer’es translated. “If we do, he will spare the orbital stations and even let us fully evacuate them. Or we resist, and he scours orbit clean and then starts on the planet.”
The terran spoke one final, short sentence, then cut the feed. Mer’es said “he says we have until he reaches orbit to choose”.
Dar’cy reared up onto his rear True-feet, and bared his fangs. “Choice? What nonsense is this? What makes him think we would agree to such terms?”
“Control of the orbitals” Dal’ton said sourly.
“You don’t think they are actually going to carry through with their dire threats, do you?” Dar’cy scoffed “They must understand the scale of the response it would provoke!”
“They just went face to face with the majority of the sector fleet and crippled it”. Dreams of Cogs, the gangly, simian Chief of Engineering interjected “Would glassing a major planet really provoke the Empire that much more?”
Dar’cy looked puzzled “Well...” he said, then composed himself. “Could they even damage the palace? I was told the planets rain-storms would cause plasma weapons to suffer excessive bloom and waste most of their energy in clouds.”
“That is half-truth, Corps-lord” Gor-sek, the small, hyperactive Vren who was the chief physicist for Dal’ton answered Iit would be inefficient, yes-yes, but perfectly possible for a point target. Also, their rail-guns will punch though that without issue. They would struggle to get though the damper field, but they could dig us out if they wish-desire it” He carefully did not mention what effect the Terrans could have on the rest of the planet and its inhabitants, as it was clear the Corps-Lord did not care what happened to the subject races who worked the systems industries.
Dar’cy’s ears flicked in annoyance, then the army commander stalked across the room, muttering to himself “Who does this human think he is, holding a knife to our throats and dicating terms? Who does that?”
Dar’cy then became aware of the gaze of more than 30 subject race techs in the room, all looking at him in amazement. “WHAT?" He snarled as they all jumped back to their work.
Gor-sek, however, skittered over “You act like that.” He explained. “The Empire jumped into Vren clan-space, destroyed any ship you encountered, and melt-fused to glass any clan that didt surrender fast enough for your liking”
Dar’cy looked up at Dreams of Cogs, who’d come up behind the rodent “We were still pre-stellar when you found us, but yes, this is EXACTLY how you guys act to everyone else”
“BUT WE’RE THE EMPIRE!” Dar’cy exploded in a rage so violent, the two subject-scientists literally ran in fear of their lives. “WE ARE THE GREATEST FORCE IN KNOWN SPACE! NONE CAN STAND AGIANST US!”
“ENOUGH!” Himdo, who’d been quiet until now, suddenly shouted, which brought the raging Dar’cy to his senses.
Himdo pointed to a comms tech “Order Quinn to move his fleet to the designated location, and send the mobile repair ships to meet him there.”
Dar’cy physically stumbled in shock, “your agreeing to his terms!?”
“Yes” Himdo said simply. the room fell silent, all eyes on the Noble.
​
“You said it yourself. Hes got a knife to our throat. If we are to have any chance of salvaging this…disaster” Himbo waved his armed expansively to encompass the events unfolding around them. “then we are going to need to Quinn and his fleet in as good a state as we can get it. If Quinn is here, the terran fleet will need to stay here as well, to keep watch on him. We have heavy elements of the Battle Fleet and over a dozen divisions of the Army en route to us, here. If we can keep the systems yards intact until they arrive, we might still be able to push them back.”
Himdo looked at Dal’ton “Your subordinates have the right of it, as well. These demons” for the first time, Himdo called them ‘demons’ without mockery “are acting like us. We need to stop thinking of them like just another subject race we can conquer with a few ships and some threats, and start thinking of them as our equals... at least temporarily.” Several of the staff in the room looked openly shocked. The Empire had not dealt with a near-peer opponent in over 300 cycles, not since Emperor Shaddam had broken the Tulak Hordes and secured the Core-ward borders of the Empire.
“if we can stall them here, we can regain the initiative. But for that to work, we will need to play their game, and set the board for my successor to capitalise on.” Himdo seemed to slump, and said in a quiet voice “Send the orders to Quinn”. The Lord High Commander then turned and walked out of the command centre
Dar’cy looked at the departing Lord High Commander with a mix of awe and condolence. He understood, as almost no one else in the room did, what Himdo had meant by “his successor”.
The Imperial Court did not choose the rulers of Imperial Domains by pulling names out of a bag. For Himdo to be granted such an honour was a sign he was destined high office in the Court, but that destiny was contingent on him delivering success.
Himdo had just admitted, to himself and his staff, that he fully expected to be recalled, tried and disgraced for his failures. If he was lucky, he might be allowed to keep title and current rank, but any shot he had at a nice Minsters position was gone. Himdo now know that Glory was beyond his grasp.
All that was left was the burdens Duty.
Duty, to a government that was going to crucify Himdo, to avoid looking too hard at its own decisions, the decisions that had sabotaged their chances before they ever met the humans.
​
Duty, that must be carried out, even in defeat.
This is part 6 of my ongoing work, the First Rift war. Part one is Post-Mortem.

Discord Name: Ben
Name and House: Oscar Whent
Age: 75
Appearance: A knight past his prime, Lord Oscar has held the Lordship of Harrenhal for decades now and has witnessed his fair share of joyous occasions and tragedies.
Gifts: Leadership
Skills: Covert, Logistician (E), Strategist, Tactician
Talents: Drinking, Hunting, Reading
Negative Traits: Old Age
Starting Titles: Lord of Harrenhal
Starting Location: King's Landing
Family Tree: House Whent of Harrenhal
Alternate Characters: N/a
******************
PC Timeline
132 AC: Born to Ser Walter Whent and his wife, a daughter of a household knight at Harrenhal, where they had been taken into service by the castle’s new overlord House Lothston.
142 AC: Oscar was taken in by Lord Otto Lothston as a page.
143 AC: Oscar was taken in as a squire by Ser Franklyn Lothston and would accompany him during the Second Dance.
146 AC: Ser Franklyn, now Lord Lothston, succumbs to his wounds not long after the end of the war. His father and brothers all died in the war and thus ended their line. Ser Walter Whent, himself wounded from the war, was granted the castle by the Crown.
149 AC: Oscar is knighted by his father and marries Lady Ellyn Wode, the sister of the Knight of House Wode.
150 AC: Oscar and Ellyn’s first son Simon is born. Lord Walter Whent dies two days later and Oscar inherits Harrenhal.
152 AC: His first daughter Alys is born.
155 AC: His second son Osmund is born
157 AC: His second daughter Danelle is born
164 AC: The Third Dance commences and Lord Oscar marches to fight in the war, his brother Ser Oswell dies in the conflict.
169 AC: Ser Simon Whent marries Lady Hayford at Harrenhal.
170 AC: His first grandson, Addam is born.
171 AC: Lady Alys Whent marries Lord Butterwell at Whitewalls.
172 AC: His grandson Damon is born.
176 AC: His granddaughter Jeyne is born
177 AC: Lady Danelle Whent marries Edmure Tully at Riverrun.
180 AC: His grandson Lucas is born
186 AC: The Fourth Dance begins and Lord Oscar marches to war with Ser Simon, Ser Osmund, Addam, and Damon to partake in the fighting. Ser Simon is slain in battle though he is avenged by his brother and son. Ser Osmund is raised to the Kingsguard by the end of the war and Addam is knighted.
189 AC: Ser Addam marries Lady Darry on the first day of the new year at Harrenhal. She would give birth to twins later that year, Rosamund and Robert, though she would suffer greatly and the Maester earned another pregnancy would kill her.
190 AC: Ser Damon’s mistress, Missy of Harrentown, gives birth to a healthy baby boy named Harwin Rivers. She dies days later of complications and Damon is slain in Harrentown a fortnight later by her brothers in a bar fight.
204 AC: Having negotiated a marriage between Amarei Lannister and his grandson Lucas, the Whents attend the upcoming wedding only for Ser Addam to find his sister Jeyne abed with Amory Lannister. Challenging the man to a duel for her honor, Ser Addam slays the Lion. The marriage is called off and both Westerlands and Riverlands nearly come to war over the incident. Lady Jeyne is married to a household knight, Ser Tristifer Lansdale.
206 AC: Ser Addam dies when he is thrown from his horse in the Flowstone Yard. His son, the newly knighted Robert Whent is named the new Heir of Harrenhal.
207 AC: King Maelor II invites the realm to Dragonstone for a feast.
AC Character
Name and House: Ser Osmund Whent
Age: 52
Appearance: Years of duty have begun to wear on the face of the aging knight, though his skills remain sharp.
Gift: Duelist
Skills: Polearms, Knightly, Defender (E), Hale
Talents: Hunting, Fighting, Reading
Starting Titles: Knight of the Kingsguard
Starting Location: King's Landing
AC Timeline
155 AC: Born to Lord Oscar Whent and Lady Ellyn Wode.
165 AC: Sent to Harroway to foster and squire for Lord Harroway.
173 AC: Knighted by Lord Harroway and returns to Harrenhal.
175 AC: Refuses to be betrothed to Lord Harroway’s daughter leading to a crisis between lord and vassal. Several attempts at betrothing him fail.
186 AC: Joins his family in fighting the Fourth Dance. His brother Simon is slain but Osmund kills his way through the Dornish and other sellswords to avenge him with his nephew Addam. He is approached to join the Kingsguard at war’s end and accepts, continuing to serve to this day.
NPCs
Ser Robert Whent - Swords
Rosamund Whent - Alchemy

*Recalled RHP Braden Bristo and INF Tyler Nevin from Triple A Toledo
2 scrubs, yippe

https://www.lotro.com/update-notes/lotro-update-36-release-notes-en
​

Update 36 Release Notes

Here are the release notes for Update 36: Gondor Renewed, released on Wednesday, May 31st, 2023.

Of Special Note:

A New Story Begins in A Renewed King's Gondor!

After the defeat of Sauron, King Elessar and Queen Arwen seek to bring peace to their kingdom, but the danger is not gone and new foes seek to threaten Gondor. Adventure awaits in the new zone of King's Gondor East, set after the War of the Ring when fresh breezes have dispersed the fumes of the Dawnless Day and allowed the sun to shine again! Discover the beginning of a new Epic-style storyline, 'The Song of Waves and Wind,' and team up with Legolas, Gimli, and friends both old and new to investigate the continuing threat of the Heirs of Castamir!
The Song of Waves and Wind
A new story debuts with Gondor Renewed called "The Song of Waves and Wind"! For characters level 140. Start the first chapter by speaking to Glindor in Minas Tirith (Midsummer)! This new story is available to anyone who is VIP, purchases the "Gondor Renewed" quest pack, or who purchases quest packs associated with the story that are released in the future.
King's Gondor Awaits
Gone are the gloomy dark skies, replaced with bright and sunny fields and hills. Players familiar with the original Central and Eastern Gondor regions will be familiar with King's Gondor from a navigation standpoint, but there are new additions, and places players previously could not go are now open to allow for further exploration!
The Quest Pack "Gondor Renewed" unlocks more than 80 quests and Deeds for level 140 characters. Includes King's Gondor East and The Song of Waves and Wind. Free to VIPs!
How do I get to King's Gondor?
Go to Minas Tirith (After Battle) and head South through the Pelennor Fields. Where there once stood an impassable is no more! Questing begins in this area of the Pelennor Fields and in the under-construction version of The Harlond. From there, you can explore Gondor up to Linhir, where the gates are currently closed.​

Landscape Difficulty: The Paths of Valour!

We have reworked the Landscape Difficulty setting system introduced with Treebeard and are now opening it to the general game worlds as an option! Read full details about this new Landscape Difficulty option in the release notes below.​ A new Faction and new rewards are now available by playing these higher difficulties. Activate your difficulty and adjust it in the future by speaking with a Hardened Traveller, which can be found in major hubs and new player zones throughout Middle-earth:
​

• Outside of the Prancing Pony in Bree
• Near the Stable Masters outside of the 21st Hall
• Just inside of the exit of Post-Raid Archet
• Just outside of Mossward
• Along the road Northward out of Celondim
• Just outside the door to Thorin's Hall
• Down the road from the Hobbit starter area exit waypoint

There are titles available for activating a difficulty of 3 or higher and keeping it there from level 10 to level 50, and then to level 130 respectively. The title granted depends on the class you play, but can be used by any character on your account. Make sure to select your Landscape Difficulty prior to achieving level 10 to be eligible for these titles! In order to earn these titles, you must keep the difficulty system active for the entire leveling span from level 10 thru 50/130. Entering areas of the game world where it is temporarily suppressed will not invalidate your title attempt, however turning it down or off via the Hardened Traveller will.

More Delvings!

More Delvings are now available! The Annúminas instances Glinghant, Haudh Valandil, and the Great Barrows instances Sambrog, Thadûr and The Maze have been converted to be playable as Delvings! Find them in the Instance Finder (Control+J by default).​

News and Notes

Classes

​

• Several player stun-removal skills were inappropriately flagged as 'Immediate' causing them to occasionally cancel themselves and fail to free you from stuns. These skills are now correctly 'Fast' rather than 'Immediate' skills.
• High Elf, Beorning, and Stout Axe Dwarf racial recall skills can now be used while mounted on any steed.
• Beorning
  
  • The Beorning Trait "Battle Born" now correctly gives additional critical damage for off-hand weapons.
• Brawler
  
  • The Brawler mounted combat skill "Take Breath" will now properly update the incoming healing rating when active.
  • Innate Strength: Raw Power
    • Fixed description of the trait to state that it grants +2.5/+5/+7.5/+10%.
    • No change was made to the actual bonus granted by the trait, This is purely a tooltip change to have it reflect real values.
  • Tracery Innate Strength: Damage/Threat
    • Skill bonus has been modified [+10%->+5%], but is now added directly to the value of Innate Strength: Raw Power buff, which makes it considerably more effective than it was previously.
• Burglar
  
  • Aim skill now works with 'Throw Knife'.
• Captain
  
  • Fighting Withdrawal can now be used while rooted to free yourself.
  • The class deed "Fear the Darkness" should now properly advance even if "Courageous Convocation" is traited.
  • Captain skill "Defensive Strike" is now properly affected by the tracery "Single Target Attack Damage".
  • The buff from Inspire: Self-motivation should now correctly overwrite itself rather than failing to apply when you still have a few seconds of duration remaining from your previous skill use.
• Champion
  
  • Blood Rage and Continuous Blood Rage are now both correctly labeled Fast, rather than Immediate, skills. This prevents you from accidentally double-clicking the skill and putting it on cooldown without gaining the CC-removal effect.
  • Tracery Swift Strike: Damage & Power Cost
    • Renamed to Swift Strike/Blade: Damage & Power Restore
    • Tracery now increases the Power restored by Swift Strike rather than reducing the (now non-existent) Power cost. Magnitude changed from [-33%->+20%].
• Guardian
  
  • The Cardolan Essence of Retaliation effects' durations no longer benefit from the War-chant duration legacy.
• Lore-master
  
  • Clever Escape is now a Fast skill. This prevents you from accidentally double-clicking the skill and putting it on cooldown without gaining the CC-removal effect.
• Rune-keeper
  
  • The skill "Do Not Fall this Day" no longer breaks the target of the skill out of Stealth.
• Warden
  
  • "Forced March" will no longer be toggled off when you enter combat. It still only applies a bonus to your out of combat Run Speed.
  • Seared Flesh now appropriately benefits from bonuses to your Fire Damage.
  • Readied Blade's buff now provides Disarm Immunity for its duration.
  • The trait 'Movement Training' now correctly increases Mitigation ratings from the Conviction and Dance of War buffs.
  • Damage dealt by the trait 'Taking Advantage' increased.

Crafting

​

• The crafting ingredients "Tuft of Torahammas' Fur", "Great Hoary Aurochs Hide" and "Speckled Shell Fragment" can now all be stored in crafting carryalls.
• Beasts in the Ettenmoors that drop crafting hides will now correctly drop Gundabad Hides instead of Eorlingas Hides.
• Crafters can now make two new tiers of selectable craftable essence boxes.
• Gundabad Skarn Deposits have been renamed to Brilliant Skarn Deposits.
• Frost-rimed Black Ash Branches have been renamed to Heavy Wind-swept Black Ash Branches.

Items & Rewards

​

• The Homestead Steed can now be correctly placed on a hitching post by hobbit, dwarf, and Stout-axe dwarf characters.
• Might-based selection boxes no longer reference or contain medium armour.
• Many medium Might-based armour pieces obtained from quests from levels 1-75 have been updated from medium to heavy armour.
• Enemies in Moria no longer drop obsolete Legendary Item rewards.
• The Distillation set now properly identifies itself as a Distillation set and not a Crock Pot.
• Incomparable Earrings received from the 3-stack instances from Return to Carn Dûm have had the names of their set bonuses changed to reflect the stats given by the items in their groups.
• The "Dwarf-make Helm" cosmetic has been renamed to "Dwarf-make Circlet".
• The Champion Legendary Item Tracery "Brutal Strikes Damage" now only appears in The Berserker barter profiles.
• The decorative band on the Sightseer's Straw Hat will now correctly display dye colors.
• The weapon Candelleth's Hammer is now categorized correctly in the Auction House.
• The Veteran of Helm's Deep Quartermaster now offers items for Beornings and Brawlers.
• The Homestead Steed can now be used in Zirakzigil as well as in Caras Galadhon and other appropriate areas in Lothlórien.

Landscape Difficulty

​

• We have reworked the Landscape Difficulty setting system introduced originally to Treebeard and made it available as an option to the general game worlds!
• We've added a new Faction and reward structure called The Paths of Valour that can be advanced by playing on higher difficulties.
• You can activate your difficulty setting by speaking with the Hardened Traveller that can be found in major hubs and new player zones who will offer you an array of quests representing the different difficulty levels.
  • Upon accepting and completing one of these quests, your challenges on the roads of Middle-earth will increase substantially.
  • The difficulty system turns itself off in group instances (3+), in the Ettenmoors, and any time the Delving system is activated. It will reactivate when you leave any of these areas.
• There are titles available for activating a difficulty of 3 or higher and keeping it there from level 10 to level 50, and then to level 130 respectively. The title granted depends on the class you play through with, but can be used by any character on your account.
  • In order to earn these titles, you must keep the difficulty system active for the entire leveling span from level 10 thru 50/130. Entering areas of the game world where it is temporarily suppressed will not invalidate your title attempt, however turning it down or off via the Hardened Traveller will.
  • Existing characters above level 10 will not be able to earn the titles themselves, but will be able to use those titles if they are earned by another character on your account.
• When playing at Fearless or higher, enemies of your own level or higher may drop Tokens of Heroism.
  • These can be turned in to complete weekly tasks from the Hardened Traveller, which will increase your reputation with the Paths of Valour faction.
  • At Fearless difficulty (3-6), these tokens can drop for up to 3 members in a Fellowship.
  • At Heroic difficulty (7+) they can drop for up to 6 members in a Fellowship.
  • The drop rate of these tokens increases somewhat with higher difficulties.
• The difficulty settings and effects are pretty much the same as they were on Treebeard, though we've changed up the names a bit, and added a few variations to the hotspot effects you can encounter under the Eye of Sauron.
• The Hardened Traveller has a menu of barter rewards that include a small set of Reputation accelerators for the faction and Morale/Power potions. More importantly, he also offers an array of 8 new Epic variations of familiar emotes which you will be able to find on the Collections panel.

General Landscape Changes:

​

• Court of Celeborn now has a map.
• Floating objects in the Allegiance Halls and in Mordor have been grounded.
• Incorrect textures in Minas Tirith has been resolved.

Localization

​

• Stablemaster map text has been updated for the German game client.

Missions and Delvings

​

• Delving Barter Vendors and Mission Givers have also been added to all our Skirmish Camps. We did this to make it easier to turn in delving quests no matter where players are. Delving Mission Givers have also been given that title as a role to make it easy to spot them.
• Created a Selectable Delving Extraordinary Box that only drops in instances at tiers 7+. While still rare, new instances have a significantly higher drop rate for this item.
• The Delving Tracery Archive Travel Skill no longer has any reputation requirements.
• Mission: Jorthkyn and the Hounds
  • The Mission now appropriately identifies that you need to kill 8 wargs along with the 8 Jorthkyn to advance the quest.
  • The Mission had some pesky low-level monsters that really wanted to get in on the fight. They have been reprimanded to stay in their lanes.
• Fixed an issue with the mission "Dangerous Deliveries" where the player would pick the pie up twice upon completing the induction to pick up the pie.
• The bridge in the mission Patrol the Township that was bereft of physics has found its physics and will now support your character as it should.
• Before the Shadow missions that referred to previous mission givers have been updated with references to current mission givers.
• The mission "The Nettinglade" had a single cocoon that decided it didn't want to sparkle. The spider responsible has been admonished and though it pledged to swallow all Light in the world, it relented and allowed it's cocoon to sparkle once again.
• Delving Reward Changes:
  • Delving Selectable Crafting Boxes that drop at tier 7 and above can now be disenchanted instead for 20 Delvings Writs. These boxes now have a six hour expiration timer on them. These changes do not affect existing Crafting Boxes.
  • Changed how many writs completing Delving quests give. Tier 1-3 now give 10 writs, Tier 4-6 give 20 writs, Tier 7-9 give 30 writs and Tier 10-12 give 40 writs.
  • Two new cosmetic pets added to Delving Barter.
  • Delving armour will now be disenchantable for more Delving Writs. Common armour will disenchant for 10 writs, rare armour will disenchant for 20 writs, incomparable armour for 30 writs.
  • Added Tier 1 and Tier 2 Essence Boxes to the Delving Barter for Writs, and removed Tier 0.
  • Added Morale and Power Potions to the Delving Barter for Writs. Morale and Power potions also drop as rewards from high tier instance Delving Chests.
• Delving Mission Givers in Skirmish Camps now give Weekly Delving Quests.
• Mission - Defilers in the Dale - Corrected a visual bug where the cauldron's contents and bubbles could become visibly offset after being destroyed.
• Rewards that drop from Delvings have been updated with new Delving-specific icons.

PvMP

​

• We have adjusted the distribution of Infamy/Renown while grouped. In the past, there was a modifier that increased the value of player kills when more than 6 kill contributors were involved. This resulted in the value of a single kill, while in a raid, to be valued over 2x what the kill should have been worth.
  • We have adjusted this modifier to make these values - in the absence of any other modifiers - equivalent to equal distribution of the infamy value of the kill.
  • We have adjusted the bonus modifier to infamy/renown gains when killing ranked players. This change rewards a higher contribution bonus for killing players of a higher rank.
• The War-spoils Carry-all icons have been updated and no longer display a bottle of liquid
• Lootboxes found by monster players now always drop 3 items from three specific tables:
  • Table 1 includes potions, barter lockboxes, and the potential for 500 commendations with weighting toward the barter box, and then equivalent draws for the remaining items.
  • Table 2 includes an equal chance for random perk items from a pool of 5 items.
  • The 3rd table has an equal chance to drop a single Audacity upgrade scroll, 2 Audacity upgrade scrolls, Lord's Symbols, Captain's Marks, 1k Commendations, 1.5k Commendations or a new Cosmetic Selection Box.
    • The Cosmetic Selection Box contains 2 new skins for each class. Previews are available on NPCs present near the Gramsfoot retreat circle.
    • The Selection Box also contains several new cosmetic weapons: Thrâng's Sword, a silvered scimitar, a spider-clan trident, an off-hand Gundabad mace, a Spider-clan staff, an Easterling Ghost Bow, and a new Dunharrow Shield.
    • The Box also contains a new cosmetic type that can be slotted into appearance Corruptions to change the style of your 'March!' skill emitted effects. These include: a white glow, fire trail, acid trail, and a "blue-foot" trail.
• The eggs around Grodris in the Isendeep Mine will now hatch if disturbed during the battle against the matron.
• Fixed an issue with the first and second marshal rewards not providing keys to the chest. The quests for First and Second marshal now correctly reward the key to the chest.
• Tokens of Valour will now go into the War-spoils Carry-all.
• Updated the new Monster Play tutorial to reference using skills on training dummy Kelsen, Jalessa, or Light training-dummy Orion. If you choose the other training dummies you are locked in combat for the full duration of the spawn - which is five minutes. This is bad. Please use the safety dummies. Use those initial skill training dummy Kelsen, Jalessa, or Light training-dummy Orion.
• First Marshal An and Tyrant Uzulthrang are back in action and ready to rush Tol Ascarnen when the opposition is in control. The rewards on the quests to use these two is increased significantly. Each has also been buffed appropriately.
• All values and costs for Lainedhal's Insignias were reduced. You can now purchase the old versions for nostalgia, but the tier 15 version is available to all rank 1 players and better for 2000 commendations and has a 1m cooldown just as the monster player brand.
• The Rank 9 mount available in monster play now has a full +68% movement bonus because it should have been upgraded along with all other mounts that are this hard to get.
• We adjusted the damage done by Spider Hatchlings to be more in line with creatures that are level 140.
• There was a bug introduced when we lowered the cost of monster play potions where we did not lower the amount purchasable from the barter NPC. This has been corrected and now you can only purchase in stacks of three.
• Mazauk and Old Goldhead have been refreshed and stand ready to help you capture Lugazag or Tirith Rhaw.
• Old U21 gear was using old Audacity values. This has been reduced to 1.
• Freepside Ettenmoors quests now award considerably more IXP when completed.
• The Freepside weekly quest, 'Battle Across the Ettenmoors' now gives slightly improved rewards.
• Many monster player skill power costs have been adjusted. In particular, several healing skills cost substantially more power.
• The base critical heal multiplier for most Creepside heals has been reduced from 1.5 to 1.2.
• Increased damage of ranger session play skills.
• Orc Defiler
  
  • Cooldowns reduced for Fertile Slime and Fungal Spores.
  • Fungal Spores initial heal potency reduced.
  • Enhanced Fungal Spores now rolls for a critical heal on each pulse, rather than following the critical outcome of the initial skill use.
  • Fertile Slime no longer has an initial heal.
  • Healing from Improved Blessing of Darkness now occurs every 1 second, rather than every 2 seconds.
  • Constant Pain now pulses healing every 2 seconds, and will restore some power to the defiler when it does.
• Orc Reaver
  
  • Blade Toss now only applies its slow and/or knockdown effects to targets facing away from you.
• Spider Weaver
  
  • Several spider animations should no longer slow down when you gain attack speed buffs.
  • Trapdoor Sanctuary now lasts 10 seconds; when traited, it will heal 5% of your max health each second.
• New Potions (of Bravery and Essence) are now correctly usable by the Free Peoples.
  
• Insignias now have a 3 minute cooldown and provide 15 seconds of combat state immunity (Tyrant Brands still have a 1 minute cooldown and only provide 5 seconds of immunity for now).
  
• Alwuld the Item Trader now carries the updated Morale and Power potions.
  
• Potions of Essence now correctly restore different amounts of Power, according to their quality and rank requirements.
  

Quests, Deeds and Instances

​

• Tier 4 of Gwathrenost, the Witch-king's Citadel is available.
• All slayer deeds in the Wells of Langflood, will now properly reward players with LOTRO Points.
• Gwathrenost, the Witch-king's Citadel - The final Objective of 'The Storming of Gwathrenost' now functions similarly to 'Into the Hiddenhoard, allowing the Player the choice of whether or not to abandon the quest after completing it. The option to complete the quest via the Quest Actions panel was causing some players to mistakenly erase their progress in a given reset cycle, so this has been removed.
• Azanulbizar - Quest: Death in the Dale - The quest guide for this quest has been corrected to highlight the proper area.
• Azanulbizar - Quest: Elusive Prey - The quest guide now properly highlights the general locations of all the Rare foes in Azanulbizar.
• Sagroth - The Sewer Water debuff that can be applied to players during the Gárvadach encounter now carries the resistance type "disease" instead of "corruption".
• Several fading or overlapping combat music bugs have been fixed in the Race of Man and hobbit tutorials, the Archet raid, and the Trouble at Tuckborough skirmish.

Miscellaneous

​

• The Allegiance panel can now be resized an additional horizontal distance.
• Certain Brawler Belt Buckles were appearing under the Lore-master class in searches in the Auction House. That has been fixed.
• Upgraded the compiler used to compile the 32 bit game client to make it compatible with upgraded OpenAL.
• Clydesdale mounts can now be used in Thorin's Hall and the Hall Under the Mountain
• The Assistant Stable-master at Elrond's Stables in Rivendell douses the horse less frequently.
• Facepaint rewards acquired from Hobnanigans now correctly shows on Human avatars.
• The Draught Horse cosmetic pets received in the Homesteads and Harvests Coffers have been renamed to "Miniature" Draught horses.
• Matching full size Draught horse cosmetic pet tomes have been granted (account-wide) to everyone that purchased the Homesteads and Harvests Coffers.
• The Homestead Steed mount scale has been increased to match the expected size of a draught horse. Many animation issues have been resolved for the Homestead Steed mount as well.
• Updated the icon for the Stoorvales/Clegur Milestone and for the Clegur travel skills.
• Several Run Speed buffs and debuffs were overwriting effects of greater potency. Player-applied Run Speed Effects should now only overwrite effects of the same kind (out of combat speed buff, in combat speed buff, or debuff) and the most potent effect should always be the one which is actively applied.

Known Issues:

​

• In French and German the Tokens of Heroism may display as Tokens of Valour.
• The Stable-master panel in Collections has not been updated to include King's Gondor.
• The Deeds "Boar-slayer of Lower Lebennin" and "Boar-slayer of Lower Lebennin (Advanced)" are not bestowing/advancing properly.

Amid a galaxy of brutal chaos there are stories to be told, tales of valor and justice, of fear and despair. But amid these stories are the guttering flames of adventures untold, the potential for a universe of entertainment and savage joyous fun. The Oblivion Cycle embodies just this kind of crafted chaos, creating the potential for creative exploits and raucous tales. If you are new to the TOC setting feel free to join the community at TheOblivionCycle to check out some of the background lore or to discuss themes with other readers. I thank you all for your support and continued willingness to read, as always, Please Enjoy!
+ Chapter 1 + Previous + Next +
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Chapter 27
Max-imum Surprise
He stood atop a wooden platform in the branches of the highest tree in the jungle. His heart beating fast in his chest as he looked out into that endless blue expanse of sky above. He blinked, suddenly there was no jungle. In front and below him was only more of that same endless sky.
He should have been afraid, should have cowered from that endless void in terror, but he found that he felt none of these things. Instead he smiled and spread his arms wide. He felt free, freer than he could ever remember feeling before.
He looked down at his bare feet, the polished red wood of the platform solid beneath his toes. Taking a deep breath he began to run. The edge of the platform seemed to stretch away from him, the harder he ran the faster it seemed to pull away.
He yelled at it to stop, to wait for him. But it did not. Instead it expanded outwards from him at the speed of light, encompassing him in a giant sphere of darkness that then seemed to press in on all sides. He felt a terrible pressure on his chest and cried out for someone to save him.
Suddenly he stopped as a profound sense of love and warmth seemed to wrap around him. It wasn't the same crushing weight as before. Before the pressure had been malicious, cruel and painful. Now the pressure was soft and tender, he embraced the feeling with his mind and smiled again. He suddenly realized that he was floating once more in that endless blue sky. Or was he falling? It made little difference, he spread his arms experimentally and found he could fly.
He laughed in childlike wonder as he began to soar through the endless clouds, doing loops and tricks to his heart's content. He had thought himself free before. He had been a slave, shackled to the ground and forever denied the truth.
He growled in anger at the thought, twisting dark branches reaching out like fingers to ensnare him as his mood darkened once more. He flitted and dodged through them with an agility that surprised even himself.
Then suddenly in the distance he heard a wailing sound, almost like that of a storm siren, but deeper in tone and altogether more sinister. In the sky overhead a darkness formed, taking a strange and terrifying form that he was unable to describe. It was as if the tendrils of darkness continued on forever, though he could not see them he knew they were there. Burrowing through reality as a worm would an apple.
He frowned, intrigued by the spectacle and unafraid. It seemed familiar, like an old acquaintance many years forgotten. It struck him as neutral, not evil or good, but somewhere in the middle. A mix of the two. He shook like a leaf in a storm as a hot wind began to blow over him and the sky split open to reveal a burning orange eye the size of eternity. He felt fear now, a terrible bone wrenching fear that spoke of primordial terrors and cosmic threats beyond mortal comprehension. But still he remained, no longer flying as he stood upon a tower of dark basalt stone blocks.
He looked at the eye and it looked at him, it seemed to look deeper than his skin. It felt as if it were peeling back the layers of his flesh and looking to his very soul, the gestalt of his core.
He jerked as a voice seemed to echo through his mind “You are not the one.”
He shook his head in confusion and shouted up to the burning sky “I’m not what one? What do you mean?”
The eye didn't reply, instead began to close. Leon raised his fists and shouted to the sky “One what? Answer me! I need to know.”
Again the voice spoke in his mind, this time quieter and growing more faint by the second till it trailed off into silence. “It is not yet time, you are not the one.”
As the eye closed the sky went dark, so did everything else. He felt himself falling again, looking down he saw a bright light far below. Squinting he saw it looked like a hospital room. The scene grew closer and more defined as he approached it at rapid speed. He looked at the bed and gasped in surprise, for in the bed he saw himself. But not as he remembered himself, but pale and seemingly without life. To his side he saw Dr. Kimathi and Joice frantically messing with something next to the bed his body lay in. It was a defibrillator.
He watched in growing fascination as he fell towards himself at incredible speeds. Joice lifted his body’s shirt and applied the paddles while Dr. Kimathi shouted something. He didn't have a chance to hear it as he slammed into his body.
He grunted in pain and convulsed as his eyes shot open. Coughing violently he tried to sit up and found he could not. Laying back in bed a bit dazed he tried to remember what had just happened.
He stopped, his mind a whirl of impossible images and sensations, and over it all a voice like thunder echoed in his mind. “You are not the one.”
“I am not the one.” He muttered to himself.
“Leon, Leon can you hear me? What did you just say? Nevermind it's not important, Leon I need you to tell me if you can hear me.” A female voice said from close to his ear.
He looked around blearily, was he Leon? ‘I am.’ he decided to himself. With his newfound identity chosen he decided to move onto his next issue.
He tried to sit up but found he couldn't. Flailing around weakly he heard a voice shout for assistance and then felt multiple hands holding him still.
“He is seizing.” Someone said, his mind assigned the voice a name. Dr. Kimathi.
Another voice, this one male, spoke up saying “I think he’s okay now. He stopped struggling.” This time his mind said the name Taylor.
He blinked a few times, trying to clear his mind. What had happened? Why couldn't he remember anything? He thought hard, his face screwing up from the stress. He remembered mud and a loud noise. But that was it.
Dr. Kimathi stood next to him and shined a penlight into his eyes while saying “Pupil response is normal, no intracranial swelling then. Leon, Leon look at me.” she said sternly.
He looked at her, his vision focusing on the dark skinned woman’s eyes. She nodded and then put up a single finger. “I want you to follow my finger, okay Leon?”
He tried to speak but all that came out was a half strangled croak. She frowned but moved her finger. He did his best to keep locked onto it. Maybe if he did what she asked she would tell him what happened to him. She moved it a few more times, first slowly and then more rapidly. He followed along and she nodded before marking something on the small datapad she was holding.
He coughed as he tried again to speak and he heard Taylor say “I'll go get Natalia. She will want to know he’s awake.”
Dr. Kimathi raised a hand. Glancing at him she hissed quietly. “I don't know if that’s a good idea. He seems to be suffering from acute memory loss. I can’t explain it, no head injury, not cranial trauma of any kind. It’s like something reached in there and scrambled his brains around, resonance scans are all over the place. It's like there was some kind of interference.”
Leon frowned at her words, again the dim memory of a powerful voice echoed through the corner’s of his mind and the vague impression of a nebulous darkness crossed his mind. But he quickly suppressed it.
“Where am I?” he croaked.
Dr. Kimathi's head whipped towards him and she rushed to his side. “Leon, you are in the infirmary. What do you remember?”
Leon frowned again, hadn't she already asked him that? He couldn't remember. Instead of asking he said “I remember mud, lots of mud. And then, trees? That makes no sense, I'm sorry.” he apologised quickly. They would think he was insane if he kept talking. Then he would end up in the loony pen with Aden.
He sat bolt upright as things started rushing back into place. The planetary landing, the attack on Oliver, the strange dream he had experienced. It all came back in a rush that made his vision swim and his head pound. Clutching his head he groaned “I remember everything… Ough, why does it hurt so much?”
Taylor looked at Dr. Kimathi and asked “What about now?” to which the woman just nodded. Taylor rushed off, presumably to grab Natalia, Leon speculated.
Leon knew that he only had a few moments before everyone else came rushing back and so clutched at Dr. Kimathi’s arm.
“Wait, I have to tell you something.” He said urgently.
Dr. Kimathi looked around the room quickly before nodding and asking “Ok then Leon, what is it?”
He held the long sleeve of her white lab coat and began determinedly. He told her of his dream and the voice, of the eye and the darkness. After he had finished he released her arm and sat back with a wince. Only now did he notice his bare chest was wrapped, an ugly yellow and blue bruise peeking from beneath the bandage.
Dr. Kimathi shook her head slowly and said “You are starting to sound like Aden. Are you sure you are alright Leon? I have some antipsychotics I can prescribe if you…”
Leon cut her off with a right handed wave, his left arm hurting too much to move it about. “No, please, no more medication. I take enough of that shit to sink a battleship already. Some painkillers wouldn't be bad though, please?” He asked her.
She smiled slightly and handed him three small pills from her pocket and a bottle of water with a straw. “Careful on the water.” She warned him as he started to suck it down.
He coughed a few times as her warning did not come fast enough and some slipped down the wrong pipe, Dr. Kimathi leaned over to pat his back as he tried to expel the excess liquid. He was still coughing lightly as a familiar and very welcome face walked around the corner.
Natalia rushed to his side and hugged him as he was still trying to settle his lungs. The result was another coughing fit followed by her rapidly apologizing for hurting him.
Leon waved a hand weakly and said “No it’s fine Nat, I was just drinking water too fast. It is really good to see you.” he said softly.
She smiled sadly and nodded, a few tears welling in her eyes. “When you stopped breathing I thought…” She started to say but he shushed her and extended an arm.
Natalia sat by his side and leaned on his shoulder gently as he put his arm around her waist. “Don’t talk like that. I’m not going anywhere. I'm way too stubborn to do anything like that, much less the effect I know it would have on you.” he said, wiping a tear from her cheek.
Dr. Kimathi spoke “Well, I am glad to see you feeling better Leon. And she’s right, we nearly lost you there a few times.”
Leon nodded and pulled Natalia’s head down before planting a tender kiss on the top of her head. “I’m sorry Nat, I won’t let my pride get in the way of my common sense again.” He turned to Dr. Kimathi as she tapped on her datapad. “How is Oliver? Is he alright?”
She finally smiled, a small tight lipped thing. “Thanks for asking Leon, I was hoping you would. Oliver is going to be physically fine, he woke up from the antivenom treatment a few days ago.”
Leon jerked up before the pain in his side dragged him back down to the dismay of both women. “A few days!” he shouted.
Natalia pushed him back down gingerly while Dr. Kimathi shot him a pointed look. She lowered her datapad and explained “Yes, a few days. You were in a medically induced coma Leon, severe lack of oxygen almost killed you before we could get you out of your suit. You had a collapsed lung and multiple fractures, not to mention a partially dislocated collarbone. It was kind of touch and go for a while.” she finished with a gesture to his bandages.
Leon winced again and asked “What happened after I blacked out?”
Dr. Kimathi shook her head and said “A whole hell of a lot. Natalia can fill you in on the details, I need to go check on something. Don’t do anything stupid while I'm gone Leon, okay?” She told him. Leon just nodded and watched the stern woman exit the examination room.
Natalia answered his question “Well, you passed out on the way up to the ship. By the time they got you out of your environmental suit you were already in full respiratory arrest. Your heart was beating but your lungs were not working.” she said emotionally.
Leon hugged her close again and whispered to her softly “It’s okay now though. I’m better. Please, tell me what happened next?”
Natalia sucked in a shuddering breath and nodded jerkily. With a slight tremble in her voice she continued speaking “We had to rush you and Oliver to the infirmary. Blessing hooked you up to a portable respirator after applying the chest tube to help drain the built up fluid. But even then you were barely breathing, she said she had to drain the excess fluid from your lungs, something she couldn't do in the microgravity core. So we used one of the lift rigs and lowered you down the access shaft to the medical ring. By that point Oliver had been rendered unconscious as well and Blessing had enlisted both Taylor and Myung to help.” she paused for breath and Leon reached for the water bottle on his bedside.
She smiled at him as he handed it to her and she took a drink. Replacing it on the table he bade her to continue. The horrid fascination making it impossible for him to ignore the terrible events.
She took another deep breath before she spoke, this one steadier as she got further into the story. “Well, after some struggling we finally got you and Oliver into the intensive suite. While Blessing worked on synthesizing an antivenom from Max, Myung and Taylor monitored your condition. Did you know Taylor had medical training? Apparently he had been a volunteer responder before he moved into military signal analysis.”
She was about to continue when he waved his arms. “Wait a minute, hold on. Who the hell is Max? What did…” he stopped. He crossed his arms again and apologised as she gave him a disapproving look.
“I was getting to that, fasten up those horses buster.” She chastised him. Her annoyance was short lived however as she shook her head and continued. “Well, when you captured that creature on the planet's surface, you placed it into a bag. The bag seemed to have calmed the thing down because as they finally got to unpacking it the little thing was as timid as a mouse. I don’t know why, but it seemed to respond in a non-hostile manner to both the venom extraction and continued observation.” she said.
Leon shook his head in disbelief. “That still doesn't explain who Max is, wait. Don’t tell me.” he said as he saw her smile widely.
She nodded her head and said “Yeah, Oliver responded to the antivenom and woke up, madder than hell. He wanted to chop the little beast up till he saw it. He looked into its little puppy dog eyes and immediately forgave them. He named her Max and almost immediately tried to feed it.”
Leon again shook his head in disbelief. Only the crazy Australian could want to adopt something that had nearly killed him as a pet. “He named it Max? What, is it a dog now?” he asked her jokingly.
She just smiled harder and replied “She might as well be. The two are nearly inseparable now.” He shot her a surprised look and opened his mouth to comment but she cut him off. “Yes he keeps a close eye on her, and no Max hasn’t attacked anyone else. Not even tried. Oliver said that the only reason that she bit him was because he stepped on her. She was just lashing out in self defense, same as when you grabbed her. Once Max realized that we were not trying to kill her she seemed to mellow right out.”
Leon still couldn't hardly believe it. The same murderous creature that had nearly cost both his and Oliver's lives, was now the ship's mascot? He couldn't take it and chuckled “Okay, I see what’s going on here. Ha ha ha, very good. I will admit you had me going with that story, Max.” he said, another slightly wheezing laugh escaping him.
She just gave him that same serious stare from earlier. He opened his mouth and threw his arms out to the side. “Oh come on, you really expect me to believe that the same murder rope that I nearly died to grab is now everyone’s favorite little cuddle buddy?”
She shook her head and said in an exasperated tone “Well I never, have I ever been untruthful with you Leon?”
He cocked his head and raised a finger. “Well, if we are counting, then… There was that time with the bean patty you told me was a hamburger that had been preserved in the cold storage for the whole trip. Had me excited as a pig in shit for that one. Then there was that other time when you called me to the observation deck for an emergency but in reality it was just you wearing that skimpy little…” She cut him off by putting her hand over his mouth and looking around to see if anyone had overheard.
She hissed “Okay I get it. And you told me you wouldn't hold that over me.” she pouted.
He chuckled lightly and shook his head “I’m sorry, but this is just too incredible. Please, humor me and skip the Max related stuff for the moment. What happened after oliver woke up, not the thing.” he pleaded.
Natialia gave him an unreadable look but continued on saying “Ok, Oliver woke up. He was a bit weak from the venom but took it well. He and Blessing took some samples of… The creature.” she paused to gauge his reaction. Leon just blinked, waiting for her to proceed. “Well, they took some samples and found something remarkable. The lifeforms on the planet have a disturbingly similar chemical and molecular makeup to Earthly animals.”
“How similar?” he asked her, interrupting her train of thought. “Sorry, continue.” he muttered as she waved a hand in the air annoyedly.
She returned to her tale “Well, they did some tests and found that the lifeforms of the world, which we named Terrelia while you were out by the way sorry.” she shrugged as he frowned. “Well, Ma… The creature is able to not only digest Earth proteins, but seems able to metabolize them as well. It has red, iron based blood with a protein ominously similar to hemoglobin as its oxygen carrier. That’s why the venom worked on Oliver so fast, it was like he had been bitten by a cobra from back on Earth. Joice and Myung couldn't make heads or tales of it, but that's the truth. I guess life in the universe isn't so alien after all.” she said with a casual shrug.
Leon just sat back in his bed, the bruises on his chest and arm smarting despite the painkillers he had taken earlier. It all seemed rather baseless to him, though he couldn't in good faith call her a liar. She would never have made up something so fantastic and then claimed it was true that vehemently. No, it must be truth. The only other option was mass hysteria in which case he had a lot more to worry about than a pet alien snake.
He wrung his hands together and looked around the small room. The walls and ceiling were white, a few cabinets above clinical countertops and a single LED light fixture completed the display. He thought about what she had said. That alien life might not be so alien afterall.
He nodded and said “I think I want to get up.”
Natalia gave him a concerned look and placed a single hand on his bandaged chest. “I’m not sure that is a great idea yet Leon. You are still recovering.”
“Yes I am. But a little walking does the body good. How many days was I out?” He asked her as he gingerly sat up on the edge of the bed. He slowly swung his legs over the side of the bed towards the floor. He winced as his leg twinged and his side smarted, but it wasn't enough to deter him from his current course of action.
Natalia stood in front of him and bounced slightly in nervousness. “Oh man, Blessing isn’t going to like this.”
Leon waved a hand in a dismissive way and asked “And since when have I let her opinion on my health keep me down? How many days Nat?”
She looked him in the eyes and said “Four days. You were gone for four days Leon. Four days in which I was lost, almost completely.” She took a deep breath as the emotions she was suppressing threatened to tear their way free. “I can’t tell you how bad it felt seeing you like that Leon. I thought I had lost you.” She said in a wavering tone.
Leon stood shakily and embraced her. He ran a hand through her hair as she buried her face in his chest. “I do know. I have felt lost too, but I have you now. And nothing is going to make me let you go.”
She looked up at him and asked suddenly “Well, you are up. It's too late to turn back now. Want to go meet Max? She really is swe…”
Leon groaned and she stopped talking. He saw her frown slightly and caved “Okay. But don't get upset if the little bastard bites you or someone else.”
He saw her roll her eyes before she led him slowly and deliberately out of the room.
Leon walked slowly, not really hurting but more sore than he had felt in years. Every step was a chore but he continued on determinedly. It was better to be up and smarting than stagnating in bed.
As they walked down the corridor that led to the main hallway Leon asked her “Are we still in orbit of the planet?”
She shook her head. “No, Joice made the call while you were incapacitated. The planet was dangerous, there might be another incident if we had decided to make another surface run.”
Leon shrugged. That seemed like the best course of action he could think of too. The planet's surface was a swamp which made it impossible to see where one was truly stepping. Oliver wouldn't have stepped on the creature if he had known it was there. The entire stupid situation might have been avoided entirely.
“Yea, that sounds fair.” Was all he said in response though. He was curious about what she thought but didn't ask. He could tell by the way she frowned that she hadn't been a fan of the situation.
Letting it go he said “We need different protocols for this kind of situation. I think the crew should have more of a say in what happens from now on.” Leon mused out loud. Natalia just patted his shoulder silently.
The kept walking a little farther till they reached the medical labs portion of the ring. Leon slowed as he heard voices emanating from the rooms ahead. Turning a corner through a doorway he stopped.
In the room were three people, Oliver, Joice and Dr. Kimathi. Joice and Dr. Kimathi were sitting at a table looking at a computer and discussing its data. What really captured his attention however was Oliver sitting across from the two women. Or rather, the long creature wrapped around the man's neck and upper torso.
Leon cocked his head, it was indeed the same creature from the planet. He looked at it again and was a bit taken aback by its appearance.
While he had not had much chance to grasp its true form on the planet he still had gotten a decent look at it. It was indeed long and snake-like in appearance, its body tubelike and covered in thousands of tiny mosaic scales in a blueish green pattern, but that's where the similarities ended.
It’s head was long and almost had a canine look to it with pronounced jaw muscles and what looked like small horns. The body was long and had a small fin-like frill moving down its center similar to an eel. All along its sides it had much larger scale looking structures that seemed to be raised off its surface. As he tried to guess as to their function he noticed some of them move. Looking closer he realized they were rows of fins all along its sides, just tucked close to the body in the absence of water. That would explain how it was able to wriggle free from him on the planet.
Joice saw them and glanced at Dr. Kimathi, saying something. Dr. Kimathi looked at him sharply and demanded “Leon, why are you out of bed? Natalia, I told you to keep him in bed.”
Natalia hung her head sheepishly and said “It’s hard to make Leon do something he doesn't want to do.”
Leon glanced at her and then said “It was my fault, I didn't listen to her. I needed to move, to get active. I’m sorry Dr. Kimathi.”
Natalia squeezed his hand and he gave her a slight nod. Joiced motioned for them and said “Well as long as you are here, come take a look at these readings. Myung and I took some samples of Max’s blood and the results are both remarkable and confusing in equal measure.” The blond woman finished excitedly.
Leon nodded and made a pointed effort not to look at the thing Oliver was holding. He took the seat that Joice had just vacated and looked at the results she had posted to the computer. After a moment he asked “Well, what does it all mean?”
Joice shook her head and motioned at a few bits of randomly squirming data points. To him they looked like so much gibberish but Joice spoke animatedly while gesturing to the readouts “If you look here you can see a partially decoded splice of their DNA. That was the first thing that struck me as odd, I expected something similar to our DNA system to give the cells guidance, but not this similar. Look, four base pairs just like us, and whats more the base pairs are astonishingly similar as well. If i didn’t know any better I would be tempted to say that this creature evolved from a common ancestor to Earthly creatures.” she paused to let the bombshell sink in.
Leon just shook his head “What is so remarkable about that. Isnt there a word for this kind of thing. Convergent evolution right?”
Joice shook her head and pointed at Oliver’s new friend. “No, not like this. Convergent evolution is more about the form and function, not the composition. This is too close to be accidental, this is… This is wrong is what it is. Its not possible, and yet here I am telling you that its not only possible, but that its happened.”
She threw her arms up in the air while giving a small groan of frustration. Leon heard a quiet quacking noise and looked at Oliver. The man grinned and reached his hand towards the creature's powerful wedge shaped head. Leon tensed, ready for the thing to snap his fingers off or worse, but instead it met his hand for pets. Emitting a soft gurgling purr it stroked the man’s hand with its head lovingly and closed its eyes in what looked like pleasure to him.
“Aww, you are the cutest little terror in the whole galaxy aren't you Max.” he heard Oliver mutter. Looking around his mouth opened. Everyone else in the room was smiling, a look of endearment on their faces.
Leon was once more incredulous. What on Earth had he missed for the thing to go from being a murderous pest to being a beloved part of the ship's small crew.
Oliver saw him staring and smiled. “Oh hey Leon, you just woke up right?” Leon nodded a little unsure of the man’s point. Oliver continued “Well, then you haven't met Max, well, not politely at least. Here, want to hold her?” he asked, extending an inviting arm out towards Leon.
Leon shook his head “No, I don't think that's a good idea.”
Joice spoke up “Oh come’on Leon, the creature is perfectly safe. Its venom is no longer a hazard, Dr. Kimathi made more antivenom. She doesn't bite, well at least she hasn't yet.”
Leon was about to say no again when he felt another hard hand squeeze from Natalia. Looking at her she gave him an encouraging smile and said “Watch.” Before Leon could stop her she strode right up to Leon and reached out towards Max. He watched in silent dread as Natalia's hand approached that razor fang filled maw.
“Nat, wait!” he said, taking a step forward then stopped in his tracks. Max was nuzzling her just as they had Oliver, apparently completely at peace with its environment. ‘What the hell?’ he thought to himself.
Natalia scritched the alien under the chin and laughed happily as it lolled its tongue out in happiness while emitting that same gurgling purr. He frowned at the sight. It seemed that his fears might be unfounded after all.
Approaching cautiously he looked at Oliver and said “How should I do it, should I let it sniff me first?” He had no idea how people were supposed to handle snakes, well, alien serpents at least.
Oliver shrugged “If you like. She is pretty docile.”
Swallowing in nervousness he reached out his right hand towards the creature. Almost as soon as he started Max hissed angrily and flared all her fins in a threatening way, trying to puff up like an angry cat.
Leon snatched his hand back while taking a few steps in the opposite direction of the creature. Oliver jerked back in alarm as Natalia shouted. Max drew back into the protection of Oliver’s body and gave Leon the most acidic glare he had ever seen from an animal.
“Oliver. What the actual fuck was that? I thought you said that thing was safe.” He said loudly, stepping back even further.
The Australian stroked his charge calmly, whispering soothing words to her and then said more loudly “Well, she never did that before. She must remember you grabbing her on the planet.”
Leon shook his head “Remember what? It’s a fucking animal Oliver.”
Joice raised her hand at his comment and said “Yes she is, but an animal with the intelligence capability of a dog at the very minimum. Im suspecting she is much smarter than that though, maybe even as smart as a corvid. My preliminary scans show that her species' neural pathways are much larger than they have any right to be. It's as if she has a brain that runs the length of her spine.”
Leon just waved and said “Alright, maybe she holds a grudge then. I've seen stranger things on this trip than a vengeful snake.”
“She isnt a snake, Leon. I have decided to name her species Terrelian Swamp Gliders.” Oliver said in response to Leon’s comment.
Leon just shook his head silently, beyond words at the moment.
Natalia walked over to his side and said “I think we have taken a long enough walk, I will see you all in a bit. Bye Oliver.” she said as she began to guide him back into the hall.
“Why me…” Leon bemoaned quietly to himself.
Natalia must have heard his cry as she tutted and said “You are in charge of what is possibly the greatest experiment in all of human history Leon. It makes sense that things would not always go according to plan. Don't fret though, I will always be here for you.” she told him with a kiss to his grizzled cheek.
Leon looked at her as they reentered the room he had been in before. “I know I do. And I respect that you see the world differently than I do. That's one of the reasons I love you so much.”
She smiled and leaned in for a kiss. He sighed as she helped him back onto the bed. “Leon, I’m worried.” she said suddenly as she sat down by his side.
Looking up at the ceiling he asked her “What are you worried about?”
She paused and then shifted her position, laying down on top of the covers next to him she said “I’m worried about us, the ship. Everyone else. What’s going to happen if we get into trouble and can’t fix it like we have managed every time so far? We don't have anyone to help us, we would be totally alone.”
Leon shook his head and pulled her close, lifting the covers so she could scoot right to his side. Wrapping his arms around her he held her tight as he said “No, we won't. As long as we have each other we will never be alone.” he closed his eyes, the slow beat of her heart and rhythmic breathing bringing him a profound sense of peace and comfort. He felt himself drifting off into sleep, the pains and worries of the day floating up and away from his mind as he entered the realm of unconsciousness.
==End of Transmission==

Preface to this: My cousin got into a new-to-her house a number of years back. It has a detached garage with an electric run and an old school glass fuse subpanel inside. The main panel and electric in the house are more up to date. I have a plug-in vehicle and I've previously used my 'granny charger' (120v 12A max draw) here just fine in the past. However I've come to find out that the old charger I had (which was replaced from a recall - Ford) didn't care about a ground. The new one does and no longer works with her garage receptacles and specifically complains about a lack of ground despite having 3 prong non-GFCI outlets (a double whammy of bad here, I know). Right now the only main electrical load is the garage door opener and a single bulb socket.
I haven't had a chance to dive into the panel yet to see what all is going on but I'd like to try and correct this IF I can SAFELY. The main receptacle I'd like to use hangs off the bottom of the panel. Probably less than a foot of wire run if I had to guess. I'm just curious if there's any concerns or checks recommended when I do so. Here's what I have in mind:

• Verify first off if a ground feed is coming in from the house wiring and see what condition it is in
• Check if the subpanel has a separate isolated ground bus bar to be used given its age that probably isn't a given. I know subpanels need to have the ground/neutral isolated.
• Probably smart to go ahead and put in a GFCI/AFCI (check to make sure first if there's not a GFCI or AFCI breaker upstream in the main panel) as a matter of fact, marking as no equipment ground if that side doesn't pan out. Doesn't help my EV charger situation, but adds a bit of extra safety and code compliance for her.
• If there's a solid ground path and ground bus bar in the panel, I should be good to simply rewire the receptacle as necessary? I've got some spare 14/2 and 12/2 romex I can use.

Also just as an FYI, I do have some decent homeowner grade tools to work with already. Decent multimeter, non-contact voltage tester, outlet tester, a GOOD wire stripper, and an assortment of classic wire nuts and Wago's.

Back in the workroom, the Top3 discuss the finale ahead of their last performances of the season!
Willow: “This speech drafting is kinda hard which is not normal for me”
Sasha: “I just said how I feel about it, which is why I didn’t find it that difficult. Of course, I don’t know how good it is.”
Willow: “Yeah I think I just have a lot I want to say and need to make sure it isn’t just me rambling”
Sasha: “I also didn’t want to write a whole ass essay (again)”
Willow: “Hahah fair point”
Sasha: “I just have the interview to do left; but I also don’t know how much I should include in it, etc. But whoever of us wins, will deserve it.”
RuPaul: “All Talk has the potential to crown 2 Australians in a row, DRDU could NEVER!”
We meet again, writers! Now it’s finally time for your long awaited interviews with the judges! As you know, y’all were given free reign on organizing, conducting, and hosting your very own conversations with a randomly assigned judge that still showcases your own strength in writing and character. First up, interviewing our fun-sized co-host, Elektra Fence, we have the blunder from Down Under, RuPaul! Read their engaging and energetic interview in full at this Imgur link. Actually, this imgur link too because the bitch likes to talk. And now a word from our judges…
Elektra (Co-Host): “Hiii mama! I was so scared to be interviewed by you, because out of the Top3, you were the one that I interacted with the least. And regarding the interview- I mostly enjoyed it! I thought our interactions were lighthearted enough that it matched your overall vibe of your performance throughout the season!”
Ra’Jah (Judge): “This pairing was a little mismatched on paper. When it came to the actual interview though, I think it went really well! I think you were surprisingly nice and respectful to Elektra as a good host should be. Your chemistry wasn’t off the charts; but it was certainly there and it was nice to see you two have a fun conversation together.”
Thank you, RuPaul! Next up, interviewing myself, the host Elecktra Bionic, is longtime frontrunner and recent target of curses, Sasha Velour! Read our honest and down to earth interview in full at this Imgur link. And now another word from our judges…
Elecktra (Host): “You were the only writer who didn’t conduct your interview live and in real time with your given judge. I think that may have been to your detriment based on chemistry and overall content, cause in the end it felt a little bit disconnected from itself as a simple back and forth the whole time.”
Elektra (Co-Host): “What I think happened was that you were so focused on asking questions that your conversation with Elecktra felt like a QnA and not an interview. I wish that you two were able to chit chat and gossip more!”
Thank you, Sasha Velour! Last; but not least, interviewing the winner of Season 1, Ra’Jah O’Hara, is the whitest dark horse of a competition you’ll ever see, Willow Pill! Read their lively and illuminating interview in full at this Imgur link. And now, yet another word from our judges…
Ra’Jah (Judge): “If you wanted to, you could call this finale interview your third challenge win. We had a great dynamic and fun conversation because of it. Throughout our conversation you always stayed in your host persona despite everything I threw at you, and you always found segways into your next questions, regardless of how off track or messy we got.”
Elecktra (Host): “I was worried about your finale performance after the reunion to be honest, because as you’ve said in your Write For The Finale, you weren’t thrilled by how that week went. However, I was happy to see that it didn’t affect your finale run in the end, as your interview was my favorite of the 3, especially the self-awareness with the audience as a host.”
Keep up with what happens next on u/albumanda-shirt or DragRush!

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For some time now, I've been obsessed with the lore of King Deshret, Nabu Malikata, and Rukkhadevata. After pouring over artifact descriptions, I thought it might be a good idea to compile all of that lore into a prose summary (with citations!) so that folks can come to appreciate the richness of all the desert's story. And so, I present you with "The Lore of King Deshret: A Prose Summary"!
Note that I've tried to privilege artifact, material, etc. descriptions over others sources, as their flavor text seems to be the most "objective." Also, in certain places I have stitched together the lore with some of my own assumptions, but I tried to keep these to a minimum so that this wouldn't just become a headcanon-fest. Either way, let me know if you have any thoughts and/or suggestions for things that I should add.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In the Beginning
Long ago, the region now known as the Great Red Sand was a verdant land under the dominion of Apep, the Dendro dragon. But during the war against the Second Who Came, when dragons like Nibelung and Apep used the power of the Abyss to fight the Heavenly Principles, it is said that the Primordial One "sent down the divine nails to mend the land" (Amethyst Crown). One of these pillars was dropped on what would become Sumeru (Shadow of the Sand King; What Shape Does the Self Hold). And while this action prevented Apep from absorbing a critical mass of forbidden knowledge (What Shape Does the Self Hold), its ecological impact was immense: "The grass turned into sand" (The Realm of Beginnins), "burying tree and meadow" (Shadow of the Sand King). Apep's once-lush realm was reduced to nothing but a vast, blistering desert. After this catastrophe, "the new masters of Teyvat … stepped into [the] land" (The Realm of Beginnings); these were the humans, and those who lived in the desert organized themselves into various tribes (The Sunken Years).
It was around this time that the one known as King Deshret rose to power and "shaped the land, creating oases and flowing springs" (The Sunken Years). Of Deshret's origins, not much is known. According to legends, he was "a son of the sky," and "whenever he looked up to the sky and recalled the boundless paradise high above, and the merciless reign of thousands of years past, [he] could not help but lower his noble head and sigh helplessly" (The Lay of Al-Ahmar). Deshret—who was also known as "Amun" (What Shape Does the Self Hold), "Al-Ahmar" (The Lay of Al-Ahmar), and the "Scarlet King" (Secret of the Scorching Desert)—was often epithetized as "the king of warriors, gardeners, and intellectuals" (Candace, Companion Dialogue) and it is said that "his people chose to cover their eyes as they dared not look upon him" because his visage "was beyond that of the sun" (Rich Red Brocade). It is unclear what Deshret looked like, but because the statues and effigies that dot the desert landscape are said to have been erected in his image (Primal Obelisk, Mausoleum of King Deshret, East; The Temple Where Sand Flows Like Tears), it is possible that he was an avian-headed humanoid. On murals, he was often depicted simply as a great ten-pointed star inlaid with a technicolor iris; this was the legendary "Eye of Deshret" (An Introduction to Indoor Archaeology).
Prior to his ascendancy, Deshret first approached Apep, the defeated Dendro dragon, and sought her permission to establish a kingdom in what used to be her realm. Although Apep "did not think much" of Deshret, she agreed to his proposal under one condition: "That after his death, all the knowledge he came to accumulate would belong to [her]" (What Shape Does the Self Hold ) Deshret agreed to this proposal and set about building his kingdom, which he sought to make "a paradise for all living beings and a place where wisdom gathered." (Viewpoint: The Barren Land Where Sand Dances).
And as Deshret's kingdom grew, so too did his power: The legends claim that at the apex of his kingdom, Deshret "had no enemies, for all who paid him no homage would be destroyed by [his] servants … and thus be rendered down to naught but a handful of sand" (Delving Deeper: Sekhem Hall ). In fact, so powerful was Deshret's kingdom that Celestia itself eventually offered him a gnosis—the metaphysical index of true power that transmuted its wielder into an archon—but Deshret is said to have "reject[ed] the gift granted by the divine throne" (Wilting Feast).
Deshret and Nabu Malikata: A Fateful Pairing
At some point, Deshret came across "a spirit created at the beginning [who was] the shimmering light that flows from the eyes of the creator" (Amethyst Crown; Scroll of Streaming Song, Vol. I). This magnificent being was Nabu Malikata, better known as the Goddess of Flowers. A benevolent deity and the mother of the Jinn, it I said that:

… the Lord of Flowers was the Lord of Joy and Happiness. Freshwater sprang from her sleeves, and thus was the oasis of blossoming flowers born in the desert. Flowers and grasses followed in her footsteps, and gleaming moonlight cleared the way for her. In the bitter days when the sky turned its back on the ground, the Lord of Flowers extended her mercy to each and every one of the mortals, letting them regain their happiness and egos, allowing leisure and luxury to resume.
She bestowed dreams upon the exiled, the manic, and the foolish. In those dreams, they were presented with their dearest delights. Burdened by the brutality of reality, they were fascinated by the charm of the Lord of Flowers and captivated by her beauty and care. … Apart from wisdom and power, she also brought mercy and joy to her people."
—Oasis Garden's Reminiscence; Oasis Garden's Kindness; Oasis Garden's Truth

But the Goddess of Flowers was not just a friendly sprite or a gregarious dryad. In truth, she was a member of that noble race known as the Seelies. Long ago, after the Primordial One had fashioned Teyvat for humans (Before Sun and Moon), Nabu Malikata had danced in heaven with the sisters of the moon (Tulaytullah’s Remembrance). But after the war with the Second, she and her kin "suffered the torment of exile" and were stripped of their "connection to heaven" and to their "powers of enlightenment" (Amethyst Crown ).
Because of this most unjust punishment, the Goddess of Flowers secretly harbored a burning desire to "transcend the absurd shackles that governed this world" by subverting the power of Celestia (Wilting Feast). But Nabu Malikata was not driven simply by revenge. Indeed, she loved humanity and simply wanted them to seize their destiny and realize the "truth": that "these so-called gods [have] been superfluous to [humans] since the beginning?" (Wilting Feast).
King Deshret "reveled in [Nabu Malikata's] immense charm and grace" (Oasis Garden's Truth) and proposed an alliance. And so "the Mistress of Flowers and Oases joined hands with the Lord of Deserts and built Ay-Khanoum, the "City of Amphitheaters," which meant the "City of the Moon Maiden" in the mysterious language of the Jinn (Oasis Garden's Mourning). During this time, it is said that Jinn "lived in a carefree palace, singing with nightingales and talking with roses. It was a beautiful time ... and even the tasteless spring water was intoxicating" (The Shepherd and the Magic Bottle).
The Golden Age of the Oathbound Friends
Sometime later, Nabu Malikata heard rumors of a most wise deity, "the owner of yesterday and the master of tomorrow morning" who went by the name "Rukkhadevata." After meeting one another, the Goddess of Flowers and Rukkhadevata bonded over their love of wisdom and developed a friendship—a friendship that eventually grew to include King Deshret (Scroll of Streaming Song, Vol. I).
Around the time that this friendship was blossoming, the centuries-long era of violence now known as the "Archon War" began, wherein myriad gods battled one another for a chance to receive a gnosis. Given his immense power, Deshret could have easily disposed of both Nabu Malikata and Rukkhadevata, thereby consolidating control over all of Sumeru. But instead, he did the unthinkable: He offered his throne to the goddesses and proposed that the three of them rule over Sumeru together (Amethyst Crown). Nabu Malikata and Rukkhadevata agreed to this offer, and thus did the three become "oathbound friends" (Honeyed Final Feast).
The trio of god-kings consequently divided the responsibilities of ruling amongst themselves: "the banquet belonged to the mistress of flowers and moonlit nights, authority was in the hands of the desert king, and life was the domain of the keeper of plants" (Honeyed Final Feast). Under this tripartite system, "peace and ease reigned," and there was no "division or misfortune" (Honeyed Final Feast). Thus did Sumeru thrive (Scroll of Streaming Song, Vol. III).
Nabu Malikata's Sacrifice
Given their shared disdain for Celestia and their desire to see "humanity … become the king of kings," Deshret often urged the Goddess of Flowers to join him in his rebellion against the Heavenly Principles. At first, Nabu Malikata refused, believing that Deshret's goal was akin to "chain[ing] the winds" (Wilting Feast). Deshret, however, continued to insist, and so Nabu Malikata used her heaven-given powers to show her friend that his future would be "ruinous and bleak" were he to continue down the path he was taking (Wilting Feast). But still, "the king refused to yield an inch" (Wilting Feast).
Never before had the Goddess of Flowers met such a resolve, and soon, in Deshret's "words and aspirations," she "saw the possibility to transcend the absurd shackles that governed this world" (Wilting Feast). And so Nabu Malikata "capitulated to her friend's folly" (Wilting Feast), telling him:

I shall keep your secrets on account of the feelings my heart holds for you and the Lord of Wisdom. I shall fashion you a bridge to allow you to slake your deepest wants. But you must fear not the crystalline sapphire nail... I will deliver you unto higher knowledge. But as I have warned, you are fated to lose much in this exchange... Nevertheless, hide my lesson in your heart. Remember the punishment that once was inflicted on the fallen envoys of heaven. Know this: If there is to be hope in this world, it will be found kindling within mortals most ordinary.
—Secret-Keeper's Magic Bottle

Deshret and Nabu Malikata consequently performed an arcane ritual, wherein the latter "[used] her body as a conduit," allowing the former to access "all there was to know about the skies and the abyss" (Secret-Keeper's Magic Bottle ). The ritual's "dazzling radiance" consumed the Goddess of Flower's body and caused "sandstorms [to wreck] revelrous havoc across" Sumeru, "folding the skies with yellow sand, swallowing all in calamity" (Secret-Keeper's Magic Bottle).
King Deshret thence sought out the primeval celestial nail that had long ago turned Sumeru to sand, and—with the assistance of the Jinn—he used its power to create an elaborate cenotaph to commemorate the Goddess of Flowers (Defender of the Enchanting Dream; A Moment Congealed). This memorial—an "ever-youthful dreamland" of "undisturbed water" and "perpetual dusk"—was held in stasis so that it would "not be seized by autumn's arms," nor would the "circles of time" be able to "subject its newborn spring-joy to the curse of years" (Viewpoint: The Paradise of Eternal Peace). And to ensure that nothing bad would happen to his fallen friend's memorial, Deshret granted the mighty Ferigees governance over the oasis (Defender of the Enchanting Dream). In addition to protecting the tomb, the legends say that Ferigees also "used her powers to keep the springs ever-flowing, and so she spread greenery across the desert like stars in the sky, providing sanctuary to folk who had lost their homes" (Defender of the Enchanting Dream). Because of this, Goddess of Flowers's memorial came to be known simply as the "Eternal Oasis" (A Moment Congealed).
Despite the love that Rukkhadevata had for the Goddess of Flowers, it is said that the latter's ideals "broke [the former's] heart" (Dune-Entombed Fecundity: Part III) In fact, Nabu Malikata's death was so impactful that Rukkhadevata decided to "cut ties with the sea of sand," choosing to instead create for herself a forest kingdom from whence she could "take up the path of defending life" (Feast of Boundless Joy). After leaving the desert, Rukkhadevata severed relations with King Deshret (Vibrant Pinion), but while the two were no longer "inseparable friends" (Dreaming Steelbloom), it seems that their past prevented them from ever truly being enemies (Secret of the Scorching Desert).
Deshret and the Vassal States
Following Rukkhadevata's departure from the desert, Deshret was left to rule by himself. But though he had just lost two of his closest friends, his power was still immense: "In [this] era … [Deshret's] power descended upon every inch of the land like the scorching sun. … No one was neglected, nor was anyone discontented. That was a forgotten golden era" (Olden Days of Scorching Might). It is likely that much of Deshret's power was due to his newfound alliance with the Jinn: Soon after the death of their creator, they had turned to the king and promised to serve him if he swore "to find [their] eternal companion" (The Temple Where Sand Flows Like Tears). Deshret agreed and thus the Jinn "became his servants, engaging in noble deeds of creation and exploration," and to house the Jinn, Deshret created myriad magic bottles of silver, stamped with his mark, in which these spirits could live in repose (The Shepherd and the Magic Bottle).
Deshret also made a pact with his human subjects at this time: "Those who possessed hearts of iron and were untainted by the allure of corruption," he proclaimed, "could serve as a vassal-king and guide the people, like a shepherd tending to a flock" (The First Days of the City of Kings). Soon after this proclamation was made, a lowly shepherd named Ormazd met and fell in love with the Jinn Liloupar, the sister of Ferigees. With her help, Ormazd managed to unite the scattered tribes of the desert (Legacy of the Desert High-Born), and thus Ormazd was crowned as Deshret's "vassal king" (The First Days of the City of Kings). Ormazd made the city of Gurabad his capital, and according to the legends:

When Gurabad rose, the kingdoms of man joined many oases into one [and the people of the desert] obeyed the will of Ormazd alone. Ormazd took the Lord of the Desert as his lord-patron, constructing palaces and temples to facilitate his worship. Slaves were taken from the tribes, servitude was demanded from states, and sacrifices were required of the cities... The city thrived, and nobles and slaves alike lived in its shade.
—Legacy of the Desert High-Born

Unfortunately, Ormazd devolved into a petty tyrant, much to Liloupar's chagrin. She eventually concocted an elaborate revenge plan that resulted in Gurabad and its inhabitants being swallowed up by the earth (Memories of Gurabad). During this "eternal collapse," "sandstorms and demons ran riot. Nightingales sang till their voice grew raspy and their blood dried up. Roses withered and turned into tangles of thorns. Poets died of maltreatment, lovers were displaced, prosperity vanished" (The Shepherd and the Magic Bottle). In time, Deshret learned of Liloupar's actions, and, in a fury, he had her soul split into seven parts (Primal Obelisk, Safhe Shatranj).
The Search for Forbidden Knowledge
Why, a reader might ask, did Deshret defer to mortals the authority that he himself had long wielded? It seems that at this time, Deshret secluded himself, "us[ing] a hundred years and a hundred years further to build a huge maze for his kingdom, before trapping himself deep within it in search of [the] forbidden knowledge" (The Lay of Al-Ahmar) that Nabu Malikata had sacrificed herself for him to get.
The "taboo knowledge" that Deshret sought in particular was information about how he could "create a dream paradise" (Primal Construct: Prospector) that was "free of worry, schemes, and slavery" (Remnant Glow of Scorching Might). To attain this end, Deshret surveyed the world around him, identifying elements that he felt needed to be eliminated. These things he enumerated as such:

The cycle of seven must be removed, because the secret narrative will be blocked.Fear and grief must be torn down, and so the barrier between life and death must be removed.
Remove the sun, the moons, and weight, for there should be no barriers between time and space.
Remove the original principles of rules, verdicts, and grace, so that she will no longer be afraid of the punishment that is laid on her kin.
Remove birds, beasts, fish, dragons, humans, and seven monk-kings, so that none shall steal wisdom. …
"None shall have to drink salt water in the King's realm, for everything in the new world shall be good."
—Staff of the Scarlet Sands

After extirpating world established by the Heavenly Principles, Deshret sought to "meld all thoughts into one, and let all calculations be unified" (Honeyed Final Feast). This goal was "elegant and precise" (Staff of the Scarlet Sands), but only because it represented nothing less than pure soteriological release from existence itself; in time, Deshret's objective came to be known as the "Golden Slumber" (Dreaming Steelbloom).
But while Deshret seems to have been outwardly motivated to seek Abyssal knowledge so as to enact his "Golden Slumber" and help thus "humanity become the lord of lords and the god of gods" (Honeyed Final Feast), he may very well have had another motive: to revive his lost love, Nabu Malikata. In the Lay of Al-Ahmar, it is said that the Crocodile King, the "commander of commanders," recommended that the king "forget the delusions of the Void" and instead seek "only resurrection and life eternal"—a recommendation, we are told, to which the king ultimately assented (The Lay of Al-Ahmar). While one could write this off as a dramatic distortion of what actually happened, it might very well be a highly poetic recollection of what actually happened: After all, we know that Deshret, while hard at work seeking forbidden knowledge, admitted to himself:

I understand now. This is what I have always wanted. That which I have always longed to find once more has never been a paradise for the many.
All the parodies of the teachings and the seven wise monks, or that so-called pure world free of all sorrows, none of those things matter anymore ...
I can see the three of us debating in our paradise once more. We are so close.
—Staff of the Scarlet Sands

This admission heavily suggests that what Deshret yearned for more than anything was a way to turn back time, resurrect his old friend from the dead, and live in the happiness of the past; in other words, he sought nothing more than to subvert "the law of universe that 'all who exist must one day perish'" (Sword of Descension).
The Fall of King Deshret
It was while "gaz[ing] upon the wisdom of the depths, and inclin[ing] his ear to honeyed whispers" (Dreaming Steelbloom) that Deshret came across forbidden knowledge from "the very bottom of the Abyss" that was beyond comprehension (Where the Boat of Consciousness Lies). This knowledge was utterly devastating, and it swiftly toppled Deshret's mighty kingdom. Thanks to the record of Kasala, one of Deshret's priests who lived through this calamity, we have a vivid description of this horrific event:

A disaster caught us unaware: It was knowledge that did not belong to this world. [King Deshret] brought this forbidden knowledge into our world and it quickly spread like a plague. People’s minds were filled with crazed whispers; dark gray scales spread across their bodies; even the land was stripped of its vigor. Only a desperate, deathly silence remained.
—Secret of the Scorching Desert

This was Deshret's darkest hour. But then, when all hope seemed lost, help arrived from east: It was Greater Lord Rukkhadevata of the forests! It seems that while she had cut ties with Deshret long ago due to a difference in opinion, she never ceased to care for him. When she arrived in the desert, the situation was dire, with the poison of forbidden knowledge threatening to swallow the kingdom whole. Rukkhadevata acted quickly: She summoned the desert priests and had them build seven great temples, into which she infused the "divine power of life" (Secret of the Scorching Desert). The energy that radiated from these temples slowed the advance of the forbidden knowledge's destruction, and during this reprieve, Rukkhadevata and King Deshret gathered up the desert kingdom's survivors and had them seek refuge in the city of Akhtamun, which in time became known as "Aaru Village" (Candace, Companion Dialogue; Secret of the Scorching Desert). But the battle was not over yet.
While Rukkhadevata's temples had managed to slow the spread of forbidden knowledge, they had not managed to fully eradicate the threat. Rukkhadevata and King Deshret thus joined forces and together fought against the forbidden knowledge. This battle was perhaps the most strenuous the two had ever waged: Rukkhadevata is said to have "exhausted her strength" in the fight, resulting in her "form [becoming] that of a small child," and King Deshret, realizing that the forbidden knowledge he had brought into the world could not be eliminated without a great loss, "chose to sacrifice himself" in order to save the day (Secret of the Scorching Desert). It is unclear what exactly this sacrifice entailed, but it is likely that Deshret used the power of his consciousness to blast the forbidden knowledge into oblivion (Secret of the Scorching Desert); at this time, Deshret also seems to have activated his Golden Slumber project by teaching his people the following incantation, which, when spoken in earnest, merged their "minds … into one" (The Lay of Al-Ahmar):

O stars high above the wasteland
O nightingales weary from the day
It's time to take off the crown of roses
Cleanse yourself with wine made from grape
—Dreams Beneath the Searing Sand

Deshret's sacrifice paid off, and the forbidden knowledge was eradicated. But it is also said that in the aftermath:

... the desert quaked, and the walls of [Deshret's] royal city collapsed. One thousand and one pillars trembled before the gale, and the bulls and griffins that once stood proudly atop them, gazing down at the lifeless dunes, now reluctantly fell into its gilded embrace. Countless people, sage or fool, hero or coward—all of them vanished within the sandstorm that night.
—The Lay of Al-Ahmar

And thus was Deshret's kingdom "built and destroyed by his own hand" (The Lay of Al-Ahmar).
Post-Mortem
Per the mythos of the desert folks, after Deshret sacrificed himself, his physical body "gradually decayed on his throne while worms feasted on it" (The Lay of Al-Ahmar). Interestingly, this could be a fanciful retelling of a historical event: According to the dragon Apep, after Deshret's kingdom collapse, she "swallowed him whole" to attain the knowledge he had accumulated, per the agreement that they had struck thousands of years prior. Unfortunately, Deshret's body had been poisoned by forbidden knowledge, which resulted in Apep losing her mind (What Shape Does the Self Hold).
Having lost their second master, the Jinn were heartbroken, and according to myth, they constructed the massive doorway that led into Deshret's mausoleum to memorialize the king (The Shepherd and the Magic Bottle). In the mausoleum itself was placed a false sarcophagus—a "golden husk"—to mark the structure as the ceremonial resting place of Deshret. Additionally, there are whispers that, to this day, Deshret's "intelligence lies elsewhere" (Delving Deeper: The Mausoleum of King Deshret), but it is unclear what this phrase means…
Decimated by the effects of forbidden knowledge and now bereft of a god-king, the inhabitants of Deshret's kingdom splintered into various desert states and began to war against one another for supremacy:

Many tiny tyrants would marshal refugees fleeing the cataclysm, and they would build temples, palaces, and high walls where once stood ancient ruins. The ruined cities would be devastated each after the next, and despots of all stripes boasting of power and wealth for a time would rise and fall all too quickly.
—Lamp of the Lost

Seven of these kingdoms sprung up around the temples that Rukkhadevata and the desert priests had erected years prior (Secret of the Scorching Desert; note that these temples would later be misattributed to Shah Ramshahr, per Primal Obelisk, Mausoleum of King Deshret, East, Underground). The names of only a few of these cities are known—i.e., Tulaytullah, Saleh, Ay-Khanoum (Primal Obelisk, Mausoleum of King Deshret, East, Underground)—but in the end, the "ears of decay" would ground them all "into sand" (Key of Khaj-Nisut). Those few who were left eventually became known as the "Eremites."

This post is part of a series looking at the massive amount of 'rhyming' (and occasionally rhyming) recursivity I believe exists between (a) the homecoming of Petyr Baelish to the Fingers and (b) the homecoming of Theon Greyjoy to Pyke.
While this series/post can be read simply as a study 'for its own sake' of the curious recursion between these storylines, it is my belief that the 'rhyming' explored here between the stories of Petyr and Theon exists (at least in part) to foreshadow that, like Theon, Petyr Littlefinger, is (among other things) a scion of ironborn kings, because Petyr is Hoare-ish: I.e. because Petyr's blood is (in some part) the blood of the ironborn kings of House Hoare of Orkmont and, later, Harrenhal.
You can find an index of every post I've made on the topic of a Hoare-ish Littlefinger [HERE].
Even if I'm wrong about Littlefinger's lineage, the 'rhyming' recursivity between the homecomings of Theon and Petyr detailed in this series remains, and certainly merits attention.
NOTE: In what follows, all uncited quotes are from ASOS Sansa VI, which describes Petyr's homecoming to his "Drearfort" tower of the 'Smallest Finger', or ACOK Theon I, which describes Theon's homecoming to "drear" Pyke.
As in past posts, I sometimes use "→" as shorthand for "prefigures" and/or "informs" and/or "is reworked by" and/or "finds a recursive 'rhyme' in".
As in: ACOK Theon I → ASOS Sansa VI.
This post picks up straight-away from where Part 7 left off. You can read Part 7 [HERE].
If you want to begin at the beginning, Part 1 is [HERE].

Smallfolk Who Do Not Know Them

What about the rest of what we read about Petyr's sight-seeing field trip with Sansa? What about that fact that most of Petyr's smallfolk do not "know him"? And what about that hermit? I submit that all of this—

Farther inland a dozen families lived in huts of piled stone beside a peat bog. "Mine own smallfolk," Petyr said, though only the oldest seemed to know him. There was a hermit's cave on his land as well, but no hermit. "He's dead now, but when I was a boy my father took me to see him. The man had not washed in forty years, so you can imagine how he smelled, but supposedly he had the gift of prophecy. He groped me a bit and said I would be a great man, and for that my father gave him a skin of wine." Petyr snorted. "I would have told him the same thing for half a cup."

—is a masterful kaleidoscopic reworking of several aspects of Theon's homecoming chapter. I'll explain.
As Theon approaches Lordsport, he thinks of a few faces he thinks he might find waiting for him, including one Sylas Sourmouth:

As the Myraham made her way landward, Theon paced the deck restlessly, scanning the shore. … [S]urely his father would have sent someone to meet him. Sylas Sourmouth the steward, Lord Botley, perhaps even Dagmer Cleftjaw. …

We'll see shortly that Sylas is a dead, smelly wino, just like Littlefinger's hermit.
When Theon makes landfall at Lordsport, none of the "smallfolk going about their small business" know him, nor does he know them:

[Theon] saw no familiar faces…
[The captain:] "I've brought your heir back to you."
The Lordsport men gazed on Theon with blank, bovine eyes, and he realized that they did not know who he was. It made him angry. He… strode down the gangplank. "Innkeeper," he barked, "I require a horse."
"As you say, m'lord," the man responded, without so much as a bow. … "Where would you be riding, m'lord?"
… The fool still did not know him. He should have worn his good doublet, with the kraken embroidered on the breast.

When he later enters Pyke castle, Theon again knows no one and no one 'seems to know him', so to speak, save the "old crone" who keeps the castle for Balon:

The gates stood open to him, the rusted iron portcullis drawn up. The guards atop the battlements watched with strangers' eyes as Theon Greyjoy came home at last.
A pair of gaunt children and some thralls stared at him with dull eyes, but there was no sign of his lord father, nor anyone else he recalled from boyhood. A bleak and bitter homecoming, he thought. …
A bentback old crone in a shapeless grey dress approached him warily. "M'lord, I am sent to show you to chambers."
"By whose bidding?"
"Your lord father, m'lord."
Theon pulled off his gloves. "So you do know who I am. …" … "And who are you?"
"Helya, who keeps this castle for your lord father."

So clearly the smallfolk of Pyke "did not know" Theon, whereas he is at least recognized by Helya, the "old crone" with a position in Balon's castle. It's easy to imagine "Prince" Theon bitching:

"Mine own smallfolk, yet only the old crone who keeps Pyke for my father seems to know me!"

That entirely true statement would, of course, neatly prefigure what's said about Petyr and his "own smallfolk" during his sight-seeing 'field trip' with Sansa:

"Mine own smallfolk," Petyr said, though only the oldest seemed to know him.

Note the recursive use of the term "know" there:

• Theon: "They did not know who he was"; "The fool still did not know him"; "So you do know who I am" → Petyr: "Only the oldest seemed to know him"

And note that we don't see Petyr having any more idea who any of his smallfolk are than Theon does who his are (or who Helya is): Yes, "the oldest seemed to know him", but as with Theon, there's no sign he knows them. (Maybe he does, in-world, but the text is silent.)

Recognition & Barnyard Eyes

Meanwhile, Theon being recognized by Helya — an (a) old crone and (b) Balon's castle-keeper — seems to be reworked when Petyr makes his landfall at the Drearfort, when he is verbatim "recognized" by all save the youngest of his castle household:

Servants emerged from the tower to meet them; a thin old woman and a fat middle-aged one, two ancient white-haired men, and a girl of two or three with a sty on one eye. When they recognized Lord Petyr they knelt on the rocks. "My household," he said. "I don't know the child."

GRRM's odd choice here to write, "When they recognized" him…" rather than e.g. "When they saw Lord Petyr…" or "When they realized it was Lord Petyr…" makes sense if we 'know' that GRRM is writing a 'rhyming' 'song': Theon was at least recognized by Helya, and this nods to that, even as the warm greeting and mutual recognition Petyr receives from and shares with his household is otherwise the yin to Theon's yang.
Note that Petyr doesn't know (and isn't known by) "the child… with a sty on one eye". This conflates and reworks (a) Theon being unrecognized by the "gaunt" — i.e. decidedly un-pig-like (see: "sty" as in pigsty) — children of castle Pyke, whose eyes are flawed in their own way—

A pair of gaunt children… stared at him with dull eyes…

—and (b) the "blank, bovine eyes" of the Lordsport men who "did not know who [Theon] was":

The Lordsport men gazed on Theon with blank, bovine eyes, and he realized that they did not know who he was.

This seems intentional: Eye styes can be spelled "sty" in the singular, as GRRM does here, but "stye" is preferred to differentiate from "sty" meaning a pig pen. The choice to spell it "sty" gives the girl who doesn't know Petyr a livestock-evoking eye and thus recursively riffs on Theon's homecoming, in which the men who "did not know who he was" had cattle-evoking eyes. The 'rhyme' is patent.

Sylas Sourmouth & Petyr's Hermit

Getting back to Theon's homecoming and its prefiguration of Sansa's 'field trip' with Petyr… Having been recognized by Helya, Theon asks her about Sylas Sourmouth, who he'd remembered when sailing into Lordsport:

"Sylas was steward here. They called him Sourmouth." Even now, Theon could recall the winey stench of the old man's breath.
"Dead these five years, m'lord."

So Sylas was a foul-smelling wino who is "dead these five years". He thus prefigures Petyr's dead, foul-smelling wino-hermit, who "had not washed in forty years". But he's not the only character in ACOK Theon I who seems to have inspired the story of Petyr's hermit.

"Sylas" Marner

The name "Sylas" shores up the fact that there's a connection between Theon and Petyr, if "only" via the 'rhyme' between Sylas and Petyr's hermit, as it's surely a reference to [Silas Marner by George Eliot], the plot of which massively resonates with Petyr's story.

• Silas is accused of embezzling funds. (See Littlefinger.)
  
• The evidence against him is a knife. (See Littlefinger.)
  
• Silas loses his fiancee to a rival. (See Littlefinger.)
  
• Silas goes to live in the middle of nowhere and loses all faith in God. (See Littlefinger.)
  
• Silas hoards and loves gold he earns from weaving. (See Littlefinger hoarding/loving gold and weaving his webs of lies. See also the "woven leathers" on the Myraham, which 'rhymes' so comprehensively with the Merling King. This also jibes with elpadrinonegro's conviction that the Vale story is riffing on Midsummer Night's Dream, with its weaver.)
  
• Silas adopts a daughter sired by a highborn man and found on a snowy night, her mother dead in the snow. He names her after his deceased mother. (See Littlefinger, and AGOT's first chapter.)
  
• The daughter "grows up to be the pride of the village" (as Sansa is set to be the pride of the Vale?).
  

There's more but those are the highlights. Note that the daughter ultimately redeems Silas from his fallen ways, and continues to treat him as her father even after her 'real' family emerges. Will Sansa 'fix' Littlefinger, as well? Or is life indeed not a song?
One more point of immediate interest to the hypothesis being explored here: "Marner" means sailomariner. If Petyr is in part a riff on Silas Marner, this could be yet another suggestion that he's Hoare-ish and thus ironborn.

Aeron & Petyr's Hermit

Sylas has something in common with the one person who does 'greet' Theon when he lands at Lordsport: Aeron, who we're quickly told twice is "sour", just like Sylas Sourmouth, the stinky dead wino who we already 'rhymed' with Petyr's hermit:

He is as mad as he is sour. Theon had liked what he remembered of the old Aeron Greyjoy.
Mallister… was a more amiable riding companion than this sour old priest that his uncle Aeron had turned into.

Indeed, it's clear that the "sour" Aeron of ACOK Theon I & II and Sylas Sourmouth are mashed up and rejiggered into Petyr's hermit story (repeated here for reference):

There was a hermit's cave on his land as well, but no hermit. "He's dead now, but when I was a boy my father took me to see him. The man had not washed in forty years, so you can imagine how he smelled, but supposedly he had the gift of prophecy. He groped me a bit and said I would be a great man, and for that my father gave him a skin of wine." Petyr snorted. "I would have told him the same thing for half a cup."

Consider that Petyr's hermit was a drunk who "had not washed in… years", who "supposedly… had the gift of prophecy", who received a "skin of wine" for telling Petyr's father Petyr "would be a great man", and who died some unknown number of years ago.
That all 'rhymes' with the Aeron we meet during Theon's homecoming in ACOK. To wit…
Aeron's thin physique, uncut hair and "untrimmed beard" make him look like a stereotypical hermit, but where Petyr's hermit was given a "skin of wine", Aeron carries a "waterskin":

Tall and thin, …the priest was garbed in mottled robes of green and grey and blue…. A waterskin hung under his arm on a leather strap, and ropes of dried seaweed were braided through his waist-long black hair and untrimmed beard.

The seaweed braided in his beard evokes the beach, where dwell… hermit crabs, who likewise pick up and make use of beach detritus.
That Aeron is a priest is also consistent with his prefiguring Petyr's hermit, in that being a 'proper' hermit is a religious calling. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hermit)
Aeron echews the comforts of a castle, refusing Theon's offer to "stay the night and share our meat and mead":

"Bring you, I was told. You are brought. Now I return to our god's business." Aeron Greyjoy turned his horse and rode slowly out beneath the muddy spikes of the portcullis.

This prefigures Petyr's hermit being a cave-dweller,
Where the hermit was a wino, Aeron's a former drunk—

The priest's manner was chilly, most unlike the man Theon remembered. Aeron Greyjoy had been… fond of… ale….

—who is now "drunk on seawater and sanctity":

"Aeron is drunk on seawater and sanctity. He lives only for his god—" - Theon (ACOK Theon II)

That phrase neatly prefigures the juxtaposition of the seawater-shooting blowhole with the boulder chiseled with the sign of the Seven, which we see just before the show-and-tell around Petyr's hermit.
Where the hermit "had not washed in… years", Aeron is called "Damphair", as if he's just bathed—

As the man approached, the smallfolk bent the knee, and Theon heard the innkeeper murmur, "Damphair."

—and he greets Theon by giving him a bath:

"Bow your head." Lifting the skin, his uncle pulled the cork and directed a thin stream of seawater down upon Theon's head. It drenched his hair and ran over his forehead into his eyes. Sheets washed down his cheeks, and a finger crept under his cloak and doublet and down his back, a cold rivulet along his spine.

We're also told twice that Aeron was "washed" in the ocean. The first time foregrounds "memory" and letter-writing, which prefigures Littlefinger the letter-writer recounting his childhood memory of the hermit to Sansa:

A memory prodded at Theon. In one of his rare curt letters, Lord Balon had written of his youngest brother going down in a storm, and turning holy when he washed up safe on shore. "Uncle Aeron?" he said doubtfully

The second time paints Aeron as a dry drunk again, even as Aeron tells Theon that the man Theon knew as Aeron "drowned", implying he died some years ago, as the hermit did:

"And what of you, Uncle?" Theon asked. "You were no priest when I was taken from Pyke. I remember how you would sing the old reaving songs standing on the table with a horn of ale in hand."
"Young I was, and vain," Aeron Greyjoy said, "but the sea washed my follies and my vanities away. That man drowned, nephew. His lungs filled with seawater, and the fish ate the scales off his eyes. When I rose again, I saw clearly."

Finally, where the prophet "supposedly… had the gift of prophecy" and used it to tell Petyr's father that Petyr "would be a great man", Aeron offers a prophetic interpretation of the red comet:

[Theon, to Aeron:] "They say the red comet is a herald of a new age. A messenger from the gods."
"A sign it is," the priest agreed, "but from our god, not theirs. A burning brand it is, such as our people carried of old. It is the flame the Drowned God brought from the sea, and it proclaims a rising tide. It is time to hoist our sails and go forth into the world with fire and sword, as he did."

Everything we subsequently read about Aeron only reinforces the 'rhyme': In AFFC it's spelled out that he was a drunk, he calls himself "the prophet", and we learn that he was molested by Euron, thus 'rhyming' with Petyr being "groped… a bit" by the hermit. Then, in The Forsaken, he has an apocalyptic vision of the future while tripping on special wine.

Groping, Bragging, Snorting

But what about when GRRM wrote ASOS Sansa VI? Were there already things in Theon's ACOK homecoming prefiguring Petyr's quip about getting "groped" by the hermit?

"He groped me a bit and said I would be a great man, and for that my father gave him a skin of wine." Petyr snorted. "I would have told him the same thing for half a cup."

Or for that matter prefiguring Petyr snorting and/or his quip about "doing the same thing for half a cup" and/or the hermit saying he "would be a great man"?
Naturally.
One of the first things we see Theon do is 'grope' the captain's daughter. A lot.

Theon agreed, squeezing her breast…
Theon's finger circled one heavy teat, spiraling in toward the fat brown nipple.
"As I have," he said, rolling her nipple idly between his fingers.

And how does Theon get her to let him grope her? With the same thing with which Petyr's father paid the hermit: wine!

The captain's daughter… had come to his bed willingly enough all the same. A cup of wine, a few whispers, and there she was.

(I guess Theon couldn't find a girl who'd let him do it "for half a cup.")
So where Theon gropes the captain's daughter for a "cup of wine", Petyr, "for half a cup", would have been willing to say, as the wino hermit did, that he'd be "a great man"… which is not coincidentally what Theon in effect tells his just-groped captain's daughter (for free) when he implies that he's going to be a king:

"As many times as I've fucked you, you're likely with child. It's not every man who has the honor of raising a king's bastard."

Theon still more unmistakably prefigures Petyr's hermit (saying Petyr would be "a great man") when, during his ride back to Pyke from Lordsport with "Esgred" a.k.a. Asha in ACOK Theon II, he says he will be verbatim "a great man":

[Asha:] "A grievous thing when a great man grows old."
[Theon:] "Lord Balon is but the father of a great man."

What is he doing when he says this? Making even more like Petyr's hermit by 'groping' her, too:

When they were well beyond Lordsport, Theon put a hand on her breast. Esgred reached up and plucked it away.
[Theon] slid his hand back up to where it had been. Her breasts were small, but he liked the firmness of them.

In reply to Theon's groping and flirting and declarations of greatness, Asha… "snorted", just like Petyr when he talks about the hermit:

"I like a woman with a good tight grip."
She [Asha] snorted. "I'd not have thought it, by that wench on the waterfront."

Thus it's hardly a stretch to imagine that this—

"He groped me a bit and said I would be a great man, and for that my father gave him a skin of wine." Petyr snorted. "I would have told him the same thing for half a cup."

—was written as a recursive, kaleidoscopic riff on Theon's homecoming.

Qalen, Wendamyr, & Petyr's Hermit

There remains one detail regarding Petyr's hermit that is as yet unmoored/un-'rhymed':

There was a hermit's cave on his land as well, but no hermit.

The hermit having a cave "on his land" but the cave having "no hermit" is a 'rhyming' rejiggering of what Helya says after Theon (having heard that Sylas Sourmouth is dead) asks her about a Maester Qalen:

"And what of Maester Qalen, where is he?"
"He sleeps in the sea. Wendamyr keeps the ravens now."

"He sleeps in the sea" is clearly a euphemism for being dead. The words "he sleeps in the sea" thus prefigure Petyr talking about a dead hermit who once lived "on his land". (sea → land)
Note that it makes sense that Qalen should prefigure Petyr's hermit, as the name "Qalen" recalls [Hermetic Qabala].
Meanwhile, the rest of Helya's answer prefigures Petyr having "a hermit's cave… but no hermit", as the line "Wendamyr keeps the ravens now" invites us to think this untitled Wendamyr fellow might not be a maester, but rather a 'mere' raven-keeper (a la Chett and later Sam at the Wall or Pate in Oldtown), which would mean there's a maester's tower, but no maester.
Yes, the appendix clears this up, but in the narrative itself it's as if there's now only some rando dude named Wendamyr who isn't a maester but who "keeps the ravens" so Balon doesn't lose access to rapid communication, even if (we might infer) he doesn't want those pesky maesters around now that he's brought back the Old Way.

The Abandoned Mine

That said, there is another piece of the puzzle. About two pages before Helya tells Theon about Sylas and Qalen and Wendamyr, he sees the abandoned workings of a mine during his ride to Pyke:

They kept a steady plodding pace, past a shepherd's croft and the abandoned workings of a mine.

An abandoned mine pretty clearly prefigures Petyr's hermit's cave with no hermit.
Moreover, given that that passage comes but one page before Theon is pointedly unrecognized by the people of Pyke castle, I suspect GRRM deliberately recycled the word "mine" into the odd way Petyr talks about his smallfolk just before he shows Sansa the hermit's cave:

"Mine own smallfolk," Petyr said, though only the oldest seemed to know him. There was a hermit's cave on his land as well, but no hermit.

(The "abandoned workings of a mine" formulation, meanwhile, foregrounds the work done at a mine, such as chiseling through rock, and thus prefigures the place on Petyr's lands where the Andals "had chiseled the seven-pointed star of the new gods upon a boulder" before abandoning it to become the desolate place it 'now' is.)

Slyas Sourmouth & Jon Arryn

Just one more thing regarding Theon's exchange with Helya, in which we read that Sylas and Qalen are dead, while someone called Wendamyr "keeps the ravens now":

"Sylas was steward here. They called him Sourmouth." Even now, Theon could recall the winey stench of the old man's breath.
"Dead these five years, m'lord."
"And what of Maester Qalen, where is he?"
"He sleeps in the sea. Wendamyr keeps the ravens now."

Petyr's smelly wino-hermit aside, what does Sylas the Steward — a verbatim "old man" with terrible "breath" who died five years ago — evoke if not Lysa's complaints about the "stinking" and "foul breath" of Jon Arryn, who was, she thought when she wed him, "such an old man, how long could he live", and whose breath smelled like "bad cheese" (of the sort a "Sour" steward might serve)?
Note the 'perfect' pairing of their breaths: sour wine and bad cheese.
To be sure, Lysa voices these complaints in the Drearfort during Petyr's homecoming chapter, the morning after she weds Petyr, whose breath, she says, "is always fresh", thus creating another strong thread of connection between ACOK Theon I and ASOS Sansa VI. But there's something else going on here.

Petyr Pan & Wendamyr Darling

Noting that we're told about Sylas and his breath just before we're told about Qalen and Wendamyr, surely we might say something like this:

• Where Pyke's former keeper of the cheese, the wine-breathed "old man" Sylas the Steward, is 'out' and where Wendamyr is 'in' as raven-keeper at Pyke… the cheese-breathed "old man" Jon Arryn is 'out' and the fresh-breathed Petyr is 'in' at the Eyrie.

So:

• much younger Petyr & Wendamyr have replaced the old men Sylas/Qalen and Jon Arryn.
• Petyr & Wendamyr ≈ Peter and Wendy
• Peter Pan and Wendy Darling → Petyr & Wendamyr

There's great resonance between [Wendy Darling] and Sansa: Wendy is about 12 or 13, on the cusp of adolescence/adulthood. She loves story-telling and fantasizing. She has two younger brothers, who become "Lost Boys". In Peter's realm of Neverland, she is forced to take on maternal tasks. (See Sansa in Petyr's Eyrie vis-a-vis Sweetrobin.) The parallels are plain.
It's worth noting that after getting caught up in Peter's world and enjoying herself for some time, Wendy remembers who she really is and decides to return home, bringing her brothers with her.
On a totally different note: Does the foregoing suggest that Wendamyr might somehow 'belong' to Petyr?

TO BE CONTINUED IN PART 9: "Cargos, Slatterns & Butchery" with Helya & Grisel.

Hello hello! Today we are going into the future of Tellius after Path of Radiance with it's sequel, Fire Emblem Radiant Dawn. After the very strong showing axes had in the previous game, will we see that same strength hold up after 3 years (in-game)?
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The systems and mechanics implemented in FE9 were kept the same for FE10. The way Strength was used for weapon weight mitigation, 2RN Hit system, the weapon triangle bonuses and penalties, the Forge and Biorhythm (some slight differences here and there though for these two). The Forge still allowed you to improve basic-level weapons for Gold, but now you could get Coins to spend on Forge Cards, which can give you random special bonuses to your weapon. Biorhythm worked the same in that it gave bonuses and penalties when the BR was high or low. But now instead of just a minor Hit and Avo bonus/penalty, the numbers were bigger and would also affect Skill activation and finding hidden treasure. There were two things that I didn't mention before. Both FE9 and FE10 have skill scrolls which are 1-time-use items that give a unit a skill if they have the Capacity, which are these "skill points" that get expended and refunded if you attach or detach a skill to a unit. In FE9 if you remove a skill, it is lost forever, but in FE10 it still stays with you, so you can take and swap around skills all you want unless they are signature or Occult skills. The other thing is that in both games, all Axes deal effective damage against Doors, which is a really niche use case but a funny and nice bonus nonetheless.
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Just like before, units have both Strength and Magic stats that raise independently, but unlike FE9 there are no magic axes so all the player needs to focus on is Strength. The damage calculation is Strength + (Wpn Might x Effectiveness), with the Effectiveness coefficient going back to 3 like in FE8, so now effective damage matters more since tripled Might is way better than doubled. Defense was still used for defensive calculations. The way to increase these stats were the permanent stat boosters of the Energy Drop and Dragonshield. Sanaki had an exclusive item called the Rudol Gem which boosts her Def by +10. And then these stats could be conditionally raised via support bonus with the proper affinities.
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The weapon list of axes in FE10 was pretty much the same as FE9, but some weapons had their rank requirements and/or stats changed around, creating new shifts in power for certain weapons. There were also a set of brand new weapons in the Poleax subclass of axes, which were beefed up versions of the "basic weapon trio" of Iron, Steel, and Silver. The Hit rates for all axes were generally higher than before, so they hit more reliably at base. There was a new weapon rank in "SS-Rank" which were reserved for the true legendary weapons. But there is actually an SS-Rank axe available to the player, and it was the one that wasn't usable in FE9! The list of axes in FE10 are...

• Bronze Axe
• Iron-Steel-Silver Axe
• Iron-Steel-Silver Poleaxe
• Venin Axe
• Hand Axe
• Hammer
• Brave Axe
• Killer Axe
• Short Axe
• Tomahawk
• Urvan
• Tarvos

The Bronze Axe is a brand new level of basic weapon that has low Weight and Might, high Hit and durability, but cannot critical. It is also the only E-Rank weapon, so literally anyone can use if you need lower damage in certain cases. Iron-Steel-Silver worked the same way it did before, but unlike in FE9, Steel Axes are C-Rank so you have to do a bit of work before you get them. The I-S-S Poleaxe weapons were equivalent to the Blade type weapons we had seen from FE4-FE8, as they were stronger but heavier and more inaccurate versions of their base weapons. They were decent if you had them, but ultimately the normal I-S-S axes were better due to their more reliable stats and access to forging. The Venin Axe was statistically identical to the Iron Axe but with poison, but poison is still bad so if you want an Iron Axe but don't have one for whatever reason, use this instead. Hand Axes actually got stronger since they had better stats overall, and retained their ability to be forged, so they were still one of the best axes in the game. The Hammer was still a bit heavy and inaccurate, but it's no longer the heaviest axe available to the player and due to tripled might, is a lot better at dealing with armors. The Brave Axe was significantly buffed since it only required C-Rank to use, weighed 13 instead of 20 like it did before, had a reliable hit of 80%, and retained its normal Brave Effect, so it was a very valuable axe to have. The Killer Axe exchanged a bit of Might for some Hit, but it was still a great axe because of its high Crit. The Short Axe this time around WASN'T a straight upgrade from the Hand Axe since it had lower Hit, and it can't be forged like the Hand Axe, but it was still a decent weapon if you had it.
The Tomahawk was still the statistically strongest 1-2 range option, but it now required an S-Rank to use. The Urvan is the only SS-Rank axe available to the player, and while it didn't have 1-2 range, it was still an insanely strong axe. 50 uses, 17 Weight, the highest Might of all weapons at 22 (barring Crossbows, but they don't count since they don't take account the users Strength), an insane 110% Hit, and a +3 Res boost to the holder to boot! It was a very easy candidate to be blessed and taken into the endgame Tower. Finally there is the Tarvos, which is the signature weapon that Nolan gets in Part 3, and was a great axe overall. It has the second highest Might of all axes at 18, but only had 12 Weight, an astounding 100% Hit, 40 uses, and gave a +4 Defense boost when held.
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The axe-wielding classes in FE10 work a bit differently than they did in FE9 due to the way these classes were reworked for this game. Paladins were mono-weapon classes, different Generals had different weapons available to them, and of course the biggest change was the introduction of Tier 3 classes that had higher stat caps, access to Occult Skills (for free, no longer needed a scroll), and access to new weapons. T3 classes also will "autolevel" secondary/tertiary weapon ranks if they are below a certain threshold. There are also a lot of these classes that are technically enemy-exclusive since some units join in their Tier 2 classes, so the Tier 1s are never used by the player. The list of axe-wielding classes in FE10 are...

• Hero Vanguard
• Fighter Warrior Reaver
• Axe Armor Axe General Marshall
• Lance Armor Lance General Marshall
• Armor Sword Sword General Marshall
• Axe Knight Axe Paladin Gold Knight
• Sword Knight Blade Paladin Gold Knight
• DracoknightDragonmasterDragonlord
• Bandit (Enemy Only)

Hero was a swordlocked class like it was in FE4, and is the exclusive class of Ike. It's promotion to Vanguard allowed it to wield Swords and Axes like GBA heroes, and it got the signature occult skill Aether, which was a mix of Luna and Sol. It was a very strong class that excelled in most stats aside from Resistance, and was befitting for the main character. Fighters were still the same as strong axe wielders. Warriors were still strong, but instead of wielding traditional bows, they got Crossbows. Crossbows were a subset of bows that required no weapon rank to use as long as the class could use bows at all, all had 100% Hit, and had insane Mights, but that was to make up for the fact that they didn't take into account the users Strength, so the Might you see is the damage you get before defenses. Reaver was the T3 class that had an even bigger emphasis on Strength, and acted as proto-Berserkers since they had an innate 5% crit bonus, and also since Berserkers were not in this game. Their Occult Skill was Colossus, but was much better since it no longer needed a Constitution check and now tripled Strength instead of 1.25, and only required a (Skill/2)% chance to proc. All of the T1 Knights had the same strengths, with Strength and Defense being their highest stats, and their only differences were the weapon they had (which frankly is a big difference). The General classes had some slight differences in stats but they were for the most part very similar and had the same strengths as before. Lance Generals had Lances and Axes, Sword Generals had Lances and Swords, and Axe Generals had Swords and Axes. However all of them promoted to the same T3 class, Marshall. Marshalls could use all 3 weapons, were very tanky and strong, and had access to the Occult Skill Luna. Luna had a (Skill/2)% chance to proc and could only activate in melee range, but on proc it would triple the user's Strength AND bypass Defense. Marshalls didn't have the best Skill stat, so the chance of proccing was rather low, but when it did it was very lethal. Axe Knights and Sword Knights also had similar stats and strengths, being great all-rounders that could provide mounted utility and high mobility, with the drawback of being locked to only one weapon type (how much of a drawback it was depended on the weapon type). Their respective promotions of Axe and Blade Paladins furthered these same strengths and weaknesses. Both of these class lines promoted into the same T3 class of Gold Knight. Gold Knights wielded Axes and Swords, while their counterpart of Silver Knight got Lances and Bows, and this was a weird way of having different weapon-wielding Paladins like they did in FE9. Gold Knight was a strong class due to their overall good stats, access to Axes, mounted utility, and their Occult Skill of Sol. Sol was available to both Gold and Silver Knights, had a (Skill/2)% chance to proc, but when it did it now tripled damage (effectively making it a "guaranteed" crit) in addition to healing the damage done, making it a "sort-of-but-not-really Aether". Wyvern Riders were renamed Dracoknights and created a brand new standard for the class, which is that they now wield Axes as their base weapon instead of Lances. This meant that in FE10, Dracoknights no longer had to wait until promotion to utilize forged axes, so their damage and utility increased a good amount. Also, this whole class line no longer had weaknesses to Bows, so they could easily facetank Archers and probably kill them back with Hand Axes. They were now only weak to Thunder Magic, which was heavily nerfed in FE10 and even if they took damage, that could be patched up via Pure Waters or Barriers, so the Dracoknight line had virtually no weaknesses. The T2 promotion to Dragonmaster gave them Lances as a secondary ability, and they retained their strengths of being strongy, tanky, and mobile. Finally the T3 promotion of Dragonlord helped raise their strengths and round out their other shortcomings, so they were kind of the best of all worlds. Their Occult Skill was Stun, which had a (Skill/2)% chance to proc, and would triple the damage dealt and lock an opponent's movement (but not lock up their other actions) for 1 turn instead of 2 like in FE9.
For the enemy-exclusive classes, Bandits were the only ones and they worked the same way they always did, but now they had no promotion since Berserkers are gone.
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Unlike in FE9 where the unit quality was very clean and consistently good, the way that classes and the story worked, unit quality varied wildly in FE10. One could argue that since the way the game is structured, availability and the "context" these units are in matter even more than they usually do. There is one feature that I won't cover in the analyses, but in this pretext, and that is Transfer Bonuses. If you have an FE9 save on the same system as your FE10 save, and a unit from FE9 maxed out their level AND a stat, that same unit in FE10 will get a static bonus in that stat. An example would be if Ilyana capped Skill and Resistance as a Level 20 Sage in FE9, she would get a +2 Skill and Res bonus to her bases in FE10. The same will go for weapon ranks as depending on a units weapon rank in FE9, it will give a WEXP bonus to them in FE10. Transfers can really help a unit are almost always beneficial, but I won't be mentioning them here since it'll make for a cleaner analysis. The axe unit roster in FE10 are...

• Nolan (Fighter)
  • Nolan is a Fighter available in all of P1, three chapters of P3, and then all of P4 and Endgame. He starts off a bit higher level and stronger than the other 3 initial Dawn Brigade members and is your best tank until you get Sothe. He starts off with C-Rank Axes and pretty good bases, but he has rather odd growths that are more befitting of a Myrmidon (high Skl/Spd, average Str) than a Fighter. He can be trained up to a very fast and skilled Reaver that also has higher Magic than usual (so you can use meme-y Imbue or Renewal strats) and can proc Colossus a lot. It's probably what you wouldn't want from a Reaver, but it is something unique and he can be serviceable if you take him to Endgame.
• Meg (Armor Sword)
  • Meg is an Armor Sword available in five chapters of P1, three chapters of P3, and then all of P4 and Endgame. She is very much a joke unit that has very little going for her. She is an armor unit locked to Swords, a not good weapon in FE10, and has high growths in all the wrong places. She won't be able to do real damage or tank well with her bad bases in 35% growths in Strength and Defense. You can use stat boosters or BEXP to raise her, but those things can be put on some other unit to a much much better effect (like Jill or Ike or even Nolan). But in a normal playthrough, she is very much not worth it
• Tauroneo (Lance General)
  • Tauroneo is a Lance General available in one chapter of P1, two chapters in P3, three chapters in P4, and all of Endgame. He is an absolutely busted unit to have...in the chapter of P1 he is in. He can easily tank and kill any enemy thrown at him due to his high stats across the board. He has terrible overall availability, but his stats can keep him competent on Normal Mode playthroughs on the moments he does rejoin. He does have good growths in all areas if you decide to train him up for Endgame, but with his limited appearances its going to be a bit of a struggle. He's just overall hard to place on an analysis like this since he has so much going for him, but also a lot against him.
• Jill (Dracoknight)
  • Jill is a Dracoknight available in three chapters of P1, and all of P4 and Endgame. Her P3 appearances are weird since she, alongside Zihark, can defect to the Greil Mercenaries and be in more chapters, or they can stay in the Dawn Brigade and be there for fewer chapters (what the outcome is is dependent on the player since there are justifications for going either way). Jill, just like in FE9, has the potential to be one of the best units on your team and uses all the tools and investments given to her very well. She has good bases, good growths, starts off with the best weapon type with a solid B-Rank, there is just very little going against her. As she promotes, she will get stronger and retain her flier utility and Weapon Triangle control as she gains Lance access, she can use whatever skills given to her well. Jill just has so much going for her and she is very much worth using on any playthrough.

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• Haar (Dragonmaster)
  • Haar is a Dragonmaster available at the start and end of P2, nine chapters of P3, and then all of P4 and Endgame. If you thought FE9 Haar was good, FE10 Haar is something else. He has great stats in everything except average Speed and low Resistance, A-Ranks in Axes and Lances, flier mobility and utility, no arrow weakness, and he has pretty great availability. But since Res can be patched up, Thunder mages aren't common, and Thunder magic is bad, Haar has nothing to worry about there (this also applies to Jill). His growths also complement his high damage and tankiness well. He may suffer from being a bit slower than Jill, that can be patched up with BEXP and stat boosters which benefit Haar a lot. He is just an absolute great unit to have and can do so much for your team
• Brom (Axe General)
  • Brom is an Axe General available in three chapters of P2, eight chapters of P3, and all of P4 and Endgame. He has relatively decent stats for an Armor knight and access to the best weapon type, so he can do a good amount for you in the early chapters he is in. But when it gets to P3, he faces stiff competition with Gatrie, who can do the armor-tanking job better. As an axe user, he will already face even stiffer competition with Jill and Haar since they do his job way better and have more mobility. He can be a good unit if you really invest into him, but your resources could go towards other units with a much bigger return-on-investment.
• Kieran (Axe Paladin)
  • Kieran is an Axe Paladin available in the last two chapters of P2, three chapters of P3, and all of P4 and Endgame. He has the best weapon type at A-Rank and all the advantages of being a Paladin, and he has pretty decent stats all around. His growths are all about Strength and Defense, while his other growths are 40% or below. He will probably be your highest Strength and Defense Gold Knight once you raise him up, and can do some decent work in the Endgame. He will have issues with Resistance and Speed, which isn't the best since you'll be fighting a lot of magic enemies in the Tower, so keep that in mind.
• Makalov (Blade Paladin)
  • Makalov is a Blade Paladin available in the last two chapters of P2, three chapters of P3, and all of P4 and Endgame. He has okay stats across the board and all the perks of being a Paladin, but compared to Kieran, he has a worse weapon type and an emphasis on Luck and Speed compared to Kieran's Strength and Defense. As a Gold Knight, he will probably be one of your fastest, but that doesn't matter as much if his Strength is mediocre. He can be brought in the Endgame, but there are much better units more deserving of those slots

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• Ike (Hero)
  • Ike is a Hero forced deployed in the majority of P3, three chapters of P4, and all of Endgame. He is the second main character in FE capable of wielding Axes after FE7 Hector, and he is a damn good one at that. He starts off with great stats aside from okay Speed and low Res, an S-Rank in Swords, and good growths in HP, Str, Skl, and Def with average/low everything else. While he is swordlocked, you will get his signature weapon Ragnell in P3.11, which is a 1-2 range sword that is very strong, has decent accuracy, and gives a +5 Def boost. At the end of P3, he will get his promotion to Vanguard which will give him Nihil, Aether, and Axes, all of which will be very valuable in the Endgame. The benefit of being able to use 1-2 range axes is a bit redundant since he will have the Ragnell, but he can use other strong axes very well like the Brave Axe or the Urvan. His biggest weakness is his Speed, but with BEXP and stat boosters that can be patched up to where it becomes a smaller issue. Of course being the main character, it is "required" to raise him, but he is a very good unit to have since he is just so strong.
• Titania (Axe Paladin)
  • Titania is an Axe Paladin available in majority of P3, three chapters of P4, and all of Endgame. While Titania isn't the godsend carry she was in FE9, she is still a fantastic unit. Great bases overall, an S-Rank in Axes, all the benefits of being mounted. Her growths lean towards Attack, Speed, and Skill so she can be a very good damage dealer, but her defensive growths are a bit lower (but her defensive bases are good so it sort of makes up for it). As a Gold Knight, she'll most likely be your most consistent damage since her growths make her stacked up that way while sacrificing some bulk. Just like with all Paladins, she is worth using on that merit alone, but she also got the stats to back it up.
• Boyd (Warrior)
  • Boyd is a Warrior available in majority of P3, and all of P4 and Endgame. Unlike in FE9 where he had a lot of availability and potential to be one of your best damage dealers, here he has lost a lot of that. He has good Strength and Skill, A-Rank in Axes, and a high Strength growth. But where he really suffers is his Speed, as enemies catch up pretty fast in FE10 and 18 Speed will very quickly not be enough to cut it. And while he has a decent 45% Speed growth, it may not be enough unless you feed him a ton of kills, BEXP, or stat boosters which could probably go to someone like Titania who will probably be a more consistent killer due to her bases and growths. If you want, he can be taken into the Endgame and do some major work with his high Strength and the Urvan, but it may not be the most "optimal decision".
• Gatrie (Lance General)
  • Gatrie is a Lance General available in majority of P3, and all of P4 and Endgame. Gatrie is interesting since he sort of takes the main strengths of Meg and Brom, and outshines them both. He has great bases in HP, Strength, Defense, and oddly even Speed (he has higher Speed than Boyd), so his job at tanking is done pretty well with him, and his strongest growths are in these stats so his job will be done even better. He'll suffer from low Movement like all armors, and he doesn't have the best Res bases or growths. He will probably be your best Marshall out of the 4 potential available to you, so if that is your playstyle, then Gatrie is worth using.

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• Renning (Gold Knight)
  • Renning is a Gold Knight available in the last chapter of P4 and all of Endgame. Renning is someone that on paper, seems like would be very good as he has decent bases, great weapon ranks, and is a mounted unit. BUTTTT, he also has terrible availability and his stats in reality aren't enough to compete with not just other axe units or Paladins, but the special endgame Royal Laguz which you will most likely use over him. If you really need a filler, playing 0% growths, or you lost Titania and Kieran, you can use him to decent efficacy. Otherwise, there are other units that outshine him completely.

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There are 5 items that benefit axe users in FE10. There are the permanent stat boosters of the Energy Drop (+2 Strength), the Dragonshield (+2 Defense), and the Arms Scroll (+1 Weapon Level up). Then there are the promotion items of the Master Seal to promote T1 classes into T2, and then the Master Crown which promotes T2 classes into T3.
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FE10 really kept the high momentum Axes had in FE9 going. The buffs that many axes had in terms of Hit or Weapon Rank requirements, the Tier 3 classes being quite strong, the Forge system, and the many axe-wielding units that were some of the best characters in the game like Haar and Ike. For the past 4 games, Axes have had such an amazing streak and were considered almost the "meta" of these games. But as we finally leave Tellius and go back to Archanea, will axes go back to being the trash weapon meant for ruffians like it was before?
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Thank you guys for reading! Radiant Dawn is always such an essay to write because of the sheer amount of content that is in this game. It's insane, but its also a lot of fun! Any comments and critiques are more than welcome, and it may or may not be tomorrow, but Part 11 will come out soon. Thanks guys, have a great day!

PC
Character Name and House: Loras Flowers (Crane)
Age: 19
Appearance: Despite being born of a union between Andal and Valyrian, Loras’ appearance hardly reflects the mixed parentage. His hair is made up of the jet black semi-curls of his father, and his face largely resembles him as well. His eyes are the deep cerulean common among Cranes. Physically, Loras is tall, with broad shoulders and an athletic frame, which can be accredited to his days horse riding and training. His skin is tanned due to hours spent in Red Lake, though his face is prone to burning.
Gift: Duelist
Skills: Swords (M), Knightly, Riding
Talent(s): Fishing, Being Handsome, Attention Seeking
Starting Title(s): Ser, Bastard of Red Lake, the Black Crane, Wielder of Epitaph
Starting Location: Red Lake
Family Tree: https://www.familyecho.com/?p=FGWG3&c=4i52wiwt4k&f=655015851654171969
Alternate Characters: Lyonel Reyne
AC
Character Name and House: Brandon Flowers of House Crane
Age: 19
Appearance: His eyes are purple and his hair is white. Pretty handsome too if you ask me
Gift: Agility
Skills: Swords, Shields
Talent(s): harp playin and poem writin
Starting Title(s): The White Crane
Starting Location: Red Lake
Family Tree: same as above
Say My Name, With Your Sunlight Veins - Birth
They came into the world together, not even a minute apart from each other. One bore the cerulean eyes of his father, dark pools of moonlit sapphire. The other’s burned the lavish purple of their mother. The color of royalty, of privilege. The color that heralded dragons.
They knew the warmth of their mother for so brief a moment. She was there, breathing in that instant, crying tears of relief and of anguish all the while. In the next, she was gone.
Then there were no hands to cradle them. No whispers to coddle them. No lips to kiss them asleep. Only the ambivalent touch of a maester, and the hollow replacement of a wet nurse.
They cried, although they did not know their own sadness. They laughed, although they did not yet know humor. And for those silent months where a city held its breath, they learned to breathe. One puff in, one puff out, in perfect unison.
One Step Away From Crying - Months After Birth
When the war was finally over, the King’s City knew laughter again. It also recalled despair. Sons returned to their mothers, husbands to their wives, brothers embraced their sisters. But for every heartfelt reunion there were twice as many funerals.
Not every life was lost on the battlefield.
When Arthur Crane arrived at the capitol, he stormed the halls of the Red Keep searching for his lady love. He was all too late. She was gone, meeting the seven Gods in their Kingdom. All she had left were the twins, and a message upon her lips that left the Reachman cold and stiff.
He did not stay long enough for the parades. He didn’t care for a soldier’s honors. He didn’t want for medals, or titles, or ceremonies. The only thing he yearned for was lost to him. Forever. He remained to meet with the new King. He said the words, he was dismissed. He gathered his two sons, the boys Viserra had left to him. And he was gone, down the roseroad. Back to face his fate, his family, and his failures.
Running Through the Cold Air, Searching for Our Meaning - Young Childhood
They made it to Red Lake, the boys born of a love forbidden. The castle was not so large as the one they’d come from, though to a toddler it made no difference. It was there they met their brothers and sister. Garlan, the eldest, who always regarded them with kindness, even if there was a certain distance to it. John, the second oldest, who didn’t seem to take much note of them at all. Braxton, the middle child, who found his greatest entertainment in the teasing of them. Steffon, who took a quiet interest in them. And Margaery, who was the closest to them in age, and never found a liking for them.
More important than any of their siblings, however, was the Lady of Red Lake, (NAME) of House (NAME). Of all the people impacted by the arrival of Loras and Brandon Flowers, the one most affected proved to be the one least deterred. (NAME), the proud mother of the Crane brood, felt the shame rise in her as she learned of her husband’s infidelity. Yet still, she was wiser than many and kinder than most. She knew better than to make children suffer for the mistakes of their father. She raised them among her own, treated them as Cranes of true birth, rather than Flowers of ill-blooming. And she managed to make a family out of them. They grew as close as any band of brothers ought to. And Arthur did what he could. Arranging for wardships with the nearby Lords that had sons of similar age. Slowly the pieces began to fit into place. Pieces that formed into lifelong friendships.
“You guys aren’t very good at this game.” Braxton complained aloud. Brandon muttered apologies, waving his hands about. Loras frowned deeply.
“You’re not very good at this game.” He countered in response. Braxton slow-clapped his reply.
“Very clever, little brother.”
Loras rolled his eyes.
He was right, the Crane. The twins weren’t very good at rats and cats. Loras didn’t understand why the rats couldn’t just fight back. Brandon didn’t much like the running away after he had been found. Their vices made for a very dysfunctional trio of game partners.
“Could I play with you guys?” A voice rang out from behind them. The three brothers wheeled their heads around, settling their eyes upon a young boy. He had sandy blond hair and eyes of pale gray. He was short.
“Who are you?” Brandon asked with a tilted head.
“Yeah, who are you?” Loras asked with pronounced suspicion.
“I’m Ethan. Ethan Shermer.” The boy spoke calmly.
“Shermer of Smithyton?” Braxton chimed in, “You’re Lord Cody’s son?”
“He’s my uncle, actually. But yeah.” Ethan replied. Braxton merely shrugged.
“Alright. You can play with us.” Loras decided. “But there’s a condition.” The boy from Smithyton nodded.
“What is it?” Ethan asked.
“You have to play the rat.” Loras said. Ethan smiled.
“I always do.”
You’ve Got Mirth and I’ve Got Snow Hands - Childhood, Early Adolescence
Loras and Brandon continued to grow over the years. Their friendship with Ethan turned into a true bond between them, and before long the three were made pages, cupbearers and squires. They served Lord Arthur himself, whenever he could be roused long enough to attend a tournament for their sake. Most of their training took place in Red Lake itself, against the quintains and training dummies strewn across the yard.
At a squire’s tourney the three boys are made four when they come across Addam Shermer, the fourth son of Cody of Smithyton. Addam is an idiot, but a loveable one. After some reluctance from the Lord of Crane, Addam is admitted into the growing number of wards in the custody of Red Lake.
It is not but a year later that the same quadrio is unhorsed in consecutive tilts by one Leo Hutcheson, the self professed Heir to the Suncage. He is a few years their senior, but their altercation sparks a conversation, which leads to a friendship. Leo is allowed by his father to visit Red Lake over extended periods of time.
In the next year, one Triston Bridges arrives at Red Lake after being removed as a ward from Holy Hall. He is slow to open up, but finds a connection in his innate ability to help others.
Jace Graceford enters a self imposed exile after being condemned by his father, the Lord of Holy Hall. With nowhere left to turn he arrives at the gates of Red Lake with nothing but the clothes on his back and the sword on his hip. He is wroth with any strangers, unapproachable at the best of times and outright petrifying at the worst of them. Triston Bridges vouches for him however, the two sharing a kind of connection that allowed them both to be vulnerable. Given time, Jace comes around to the Boys of Red Lake, and becomes a fierce protector of his friends, though he is still adversarial to most others.
The behemoth of a “boy” grunted as his axe slammed into the shield of his opponent.
Loras Flowers’ teeth rattled at the impact. Jace Graceford was a beast by any metric. Taller, stronger, and more vicious at arms than any of the other Boys. The bastard marveled at his power, and cursed the fact that he’d drawn him as his sparring partner.
The axe slammed down again and again. Loras checked with his shield. His forearm flared hot with pain from the effort. He brought his sword low to earn him some ground. Jace swatted that attempt with his own shield, then laid down the assault.
He made Loras yield, though it had not come without work. The bastard had been disarmed twice, first his sword, then his shield that he’d tried to use in its place. His knuckles were bloody from that poor decision, but he took Jace’s outstretched hand all the same. After the fighting they were brothers. No matter what.
They watched the rest of the Boys spar after their match was over. Addam bested Brandon. Steffon defeated Ethan. Then it was time for Triston and Leo. Bridges was no match for Hutcheson, not really, but no one ever got better fighting someone they knew they could beat. It went as it always did, Leo’s extra size, experience, and finesse worked circles around the slighter built Triston. Instead of yielding, the redhead kept on coming, even after he’d been smacked in the chest and head. Loras remembered a time where that would have set Jace off, sent him into a frenzy that only Triston could pull him out of. Now they all had that kind of bond.
When it was over, Leo’s hand stretched downward, and up came Triston.
After the fighting they were brothers. No matter what.
Chin Held Shut, So My Heart Can Talk Louder - Teenage Years, Present
It was all so sudden when it came crashing down. (NAME) had been expecting, her and Arthur had finally seemed to learn love for the sake of themselves, and not expectations. This child was meant to be the last. The one that carried them all into the future. None of them could have known how it would end.
She died in the delivery room. Just like their other mother had. And she left them a brother, who Arthur named Aemond despite his grief.
It was all so quiet afterwards. Red Lake forgot how to smile in the months following her death. Garlan couldn’t take it, his mother’s death only seemed to drive him further away from their Lord father. John finally stood still long enough to be spoken to. He seemed to regret all the years he’d spent shirking his mother’s affections. Braxton cried, and vowed to never go a day without praying for their lost matriarch. He kept his promise.
It took years, but they healed. It wasn’t obvious when, but at some point they felt joy again. They laughed, cried, won, lost. Life continued, no matter how hard it was, and new resolves were born in the aftermath.
Loras and Brandon swore an oath to each other, with all their companions at their side as witnesses. They would earn a name for themselves, as the Oldflowers’ had done, as the Vikarys had. Just as their mother had wished for them.
NPCs:
Jace Graceford, Heir to Holy Hall - Axes (o)
Triston Bridges, Scion of Red Crossing - Medic)

27M — I live in an apt building and about a week ago, a maintenance staff pulled me aside and said “you have an secret admirer she saw you and said damn he’s hot”
I laughed and he told me who and I recognized her car, which she has a smoking hot Mercedes AMG, I have one too!
Well, a few weeks later, today we leave the garage like the same time and end up going several miles in the same direction. I rolled down my window beeped and gave her a thumbs up about her car. She just kinda smiled / acknowledged it and gave me a high beam flash.
I blasted ahead and she caught up and was driving hard, it was awesome! We drove as a pack for about 10 miles and I had to exit — when I did she gave me a triple high beam flash to say “good bye”
I found which unit she’s in and I’m wondering how weird it’d be to just go say hi?
Like knock on the door and say “hey, just wanted to introduce myself!”
Creepy? Too forward?
Maybe it’s more appropriate to just leave a friendly note on her car complimenting it? That way it’s not too sexual / on the spot and I could always play it off that I just liked her car?
FWIW, I’ve never seen her in real life as far as I can recall. Clearly that is… I know her car and yes saw her on the road, but window tints…

This is the third in a series of posts, in which I present a theory on the history of the Others. You can read part one here, part two here, and part three here.
My previous posts came with a disclaimer, which I'm going to copy-paste below:
In a certain sense, I am both a new and an old fan of ASOIAF. I read the books about ten years ago, enjoyed them, and then barely thought about them ever again after putting them down. Then, HotD got me interested in the series again, and I ended up going down the rabbit hole of fan theories, speculation about future books, details that I missed on my first reading, etc., which has been a lot of fun! But I’ve only read the series once, and it was ten years ago, so a lot of my memories are pretty fuzzy. Honestly, a lot of my knowledge comes from the wiki (although I have gone back and reread certain important chapters). All of this is to say, I am not the most knowledgeable person to be coming up with fan theories, and the fact that I’m posting this at all probably indicates a certain amount of Dunning-Kruger effect. Take everything I say here with a grain of salt, and please let me know if there’s something obvious that my ignorance has caused me to miss. Other than that, let me know what you think!
But I also need to include another disclaimer: I came up with this theory before I became aware of the idea that Bloodraven wasn't the three-eyed crow, and, as such, this theory assumes that Bloodraven is the three-eyed crow. To be honest, I'm becoming increasingly sympathetic to the idea that Bloodraven isn't the 3EC, but I'm still undecided. If Bloodraven isn't the 3EC, that will poke a few holes in this theory, but I ultimately think it wouldn't be too big of a problem. After all, the 3EC led Bran to Bloodraven, so they must share at least some goals. So, I ask that you assume for the purposes of this post that Bloodraven is the 3EC, with the understanding that, if it turns out that Bloodraven isn't the 3EC, this theory will need some minor amending. I've already been thinking about theories on that topic, so, if and when I finish such a theory, I'll post it and discuss how it modifies this theory. But that's getting ahead of ourselves. For now…

Part 4: Bloodraven

Making First Men horny

One of the most powerful pieces of magic we're told of in ASOIAF is the Hammer of the Waters. This is a spell that causes powerful earthquakes, capable of radically reshaping the geography where it's used. The Children of the Forest are said to have used the Hammer of the Waters on at least two occasions: once to flood the Neck, and once to break the Arm of Dorne. I argued in my previous post that the Horn of Winter contains the same magic as the Hammer of the Waters, and that when Joramun blew the Horn of Winter the resulting earthquake destroyed the western section of the Wall and created the Gorge. However, while the Horn of Winter replicates the magic of the Hammer of the Waters, that doesn't mean the Horn of Winter was the original Hammer of the Waters; that is to say, I don't think that the Horn of Winter was used to flood the Neck or break the Arm of Dorne. There are a few reasons why the Horn probably wasn't responsible for these historical events:

1. The Horn of Winter is probably the same horn that's currently in Sam's possession (link to a series of posts that analyzes the Horn of Winter and lays out this argument), and that horn is banded in bronze. The CotF didn't work with bronze.
2. TWOIAF described how the CotF brought about the Hammer of the Waters, and it had nothing to do with sounding a horn. Supposedly, it was your standard blood sacrifice deal: kill a bunch of people, and in exchange a powerful magical effect will occur. While the Horn of Winter might kill the person who blew it (in the same way Dragonbinder does), we have no reason to believe it requires a mass sacrifice.
3. Creating the Gorge, while no mean feat, is much less impressive than breaking the Arm of Dorne or flooding the Neck. The Horn of Winter appears to be a weaker version of the Hammer of the Waters.

So it looks like, compared to the original Hammer of the Waters, the Horn of Winter represents a tradeoff of power for convenience: the resulting earthquake isn't as strong, but you can create an earthquake without performing a massive blood sacrifice. But I want to focus on the fact that the Horn of Winter is banded in bronze. The CotF don't use bronze, but you know who do? The First Men. The Horn of Winter contains the magic of the CotF, but its physical structure could only have been made by the First Men. This suggests that the First Men (or some faction thereof) and the CotF (or some faction thereof) collaborated to create the Horn of Winter.
I suspect that that First Men faction was none other than the Stark Kings of Winter; this would explain why it's called the Horn of Winter in the first place. Regardless of which group of First Men was responsible, however, it's easy to see why they did it: the Horn of Winter is a powerful weapon, and any faction of First Men would have been happy to have such a weapon in their possession. So the interesting question isn't, "Why did the First Men work with the CotF to create the Horn of Winter?" The interesting question is, "Why did the CotF work with the First Men to create the Horn of Winter?" Why would the CotF give the First Men a weapon capable of destroying the Wall?
Let's take a step back and recall the role that the CotF played in the events leading up to the construction of the Wall. Their lands were invaded by the First Men, and I argued in my first post that they responded by creating the Others as a race of slave soldiers to fight the First Men. After the Pact ended the war between the CotF and the First Men, the CotF kept the Others enslaved and/or hunted down the free ones in the Lands of Always Winter. Then the Long Night came, and I argued in my second post that the Others took advantage of it by attacking the First Men, killing them en masse in order to grow their power, with the ultimate goal of attacking the CotF. Eventually, the CotF participated in the peace agreement that ended the Long Night. But it's worth remembering that the CotF only interceded in the conflict between humans and Others at the urging of the Last Hero:

"Now these were the days before the Andals came, and long before the women fled across the narrow sea from the cities of the Rhoyne, and the hundred kingdoms of those times were the kingdoms of the First Men, who had taken these lands from the children of the forest. Yet here and there in the fastness of the woods the children still lived in their wooden cities and hollow hills, and the faces in the trees kept watch. So as cold and death filled the earth, the last hero determined to seek out the children, in the hopes that their ancient magics could win back what the armies of men had lost." (AGOT, Bran IV)

Prior to the Last Hero, the CotF seem to have been content to sit back and watch the humans and the Others kill each other—which, considering the history of those three species, is understandable. (According to Sam, the CotF did at one point give obsidian daggers to the Night's Watch, so the CotF did get involved in the conflict between the humans and the Others eventually, but this probably didn't happen until after the Last Hero made contact with them. Old Nan says that the Last Hero had to go on a quest of some difficulty to make contact with the CotF; presumably, this wouldn't have been necessary if the CotF were already giving obsidian daggers to the Night's Watch, because then the Last Hero could have just gone to the Night's Watch and gotten in contact with the CotF that way. So, for most if not all of the Long Night, the CotF did not provide humans with obsidian weapons, meaning that they truly were uninvolved in the conflict between the two species.) I argued in my second post that the peace agreement between the First Men and the Others was an essential part of ending the Long Night, and that this was facilitated by the Last Hero/Azor Ahai. The CotF's absence in the conflict between the humans and the Others prior to the Last Hero's involvement suggests that the CotF had no desire to see the humans and the Others make peace. They only facilitated a peace agreement because it was necessary in order to end the Long Night. The Long Night was an existential threat to the CotF, both because the forests can't survive in an eternal night and because the Others might eventually become powerful enough to threaten the CotF. So the CotF needed to end the Long Night, and ending the Long Night necessitated a peace agreement between humans and Others. It's very easy to imagine that the Last Hero's pitch to the CotF went something like, "Look, I know there's no love lost between you and humanity, and certainly none between you and the Others. But the Long Night isn't going to end unless all three species work together, and the Long Night will kill you guys, just as it will kill humanity. For your own sake, work with us to end this." Clearly, this argument was persuasive. But, once the Long Night ended, the CotF no longer had any reason to care about peace between the humans and the Others—a peace that only existed thanks to the Wall, which was partially destroyed by the Horn of Winter, which the CotF helped to create. The logical conclusion is that the CotF made the Horn of Winter in order to destroy the Wall and renew the war between the humans and the Others. The CotF weren't unconcerned observers to the human-Other war; they actively wanted the two species to fight.
You may be wondering, why didn't the CotF just destroy the Wall using the Hammer of the Waters? The problem with doing that is that the Hammer of the Waters is distinctly CotF magic, so destroying the Wall with the Hammer of the Waters would have pointed right back to the CotF. The humans and the Others would have known that the CotF were trying to provoke them back into war, and they would have naturally resisted those efforts. The way around this is to give humans access to the same magic as the Hammer of the Waters. That way, when the humans use that magic near the Wall, it will be the humans who are responsible for destroying the Wall. Helping the First Men create the Horn of Winter was therefore a way for the CotF to end the peace between humanity and the Others, all while maintaining plausible deniability. And it kind of worked; the Horn of Winter did destroy the western part of the Wall. But this didn't result in the human-Other war that the CotF wanted, because, as I argued in my previous post, the Others' queen was taken captive at the same time as the destruction of the Wall, and she's been used as a hostage to keep the peace ever since.

Child psychology

I've argued that the CotF wanted the humans and Others to fight, but I haven't explained why they'd want that. The easy answer is that the CotF have grievances with both the humans and the Others, so they wanted bloodshed between the two. But we shouldn't accept that easy answer too readily. If we're going to understand what the CotF want, we're going to have to get inside their heads. The books tell us about at least one way in which CotF psychology differs from human psychology:

"That was in the dawn of days, when our sun was rising. Now it sinks, and this is our long dwindling. The giants are almost gone as well, they who were our bane and our brothers. The great lions of the western hills have been slain, the unicorns are all but gone, the mammoths down to a few hundred. The direwolves will outlast us all, but their time will come as well. In the world that men have made, there is no room for them, or us."
She seemed sad when she said it, and that made Bran sad as well. It was only later that he thought, Men would not be sad. Men would be wroth. Men would hate and swear a bloody vengeance. The singers sing sad songs, where men would fight and kill. (ADWD, Bran III)

So we're told that vengeance and spite aren't really a thing for the CotF, or at least not in the way that they are for humans. I've heard some people suggest that Leaf might be lying here, and that the CotF actually do want vengeance, but I don't think so, for a couple of reasons. First, and this is purely personal preference, I think it's a lot more interesting if the CotF don't think in the same way that humans do. If you're going to have multiple sentient species in your story, and they all think and behave in the same way, then it kind of defeats the purpose of having multiple species in the first place, doesn't it? If the CotF think and act just like humans do, I would personally find that boring. Secondly, and more importantly, we know that the CotF employ at least one human, Bloodraven, as a greenseer. This is a position of importance and confidence in CotF society, and it gives Bloodraven access to immense information. If the CotF were really planning on taking vengeance on humanity, then it's unlikely that they would be able to hide that information from Bloodraven (and any other human greenseers the CotF had; we don't know if Bloodraven was the only one), and it's unlikely that Bloodraven would help the CotF destroy or harm his own species. So the fact that the CotF rely on Bloodraven (and possibly other human greenseers in the past) suggests that the CotF genuinely don't wish any ill will on humanity, just as Leaf said. And if the CotF don't wish any ill will on humanity today, then they also probably didn't wish any ill will on humanity at the time they made the Horn of Winter—that was back when humans still held to the Pact, so the CotF would have had fewer grievances back then than they do today. So, if the CotF wanted to cause a war between the humans and the Others, and their goal wasn't to cause any long-term harm to humanity as a species, then their intent must have been to harm, weaken, or exterminate the Others. The CotF wanted the humans and the Others to go back to war, and they wanted humans to win. This explains why the CotF used to gift obsidian daggers to the Night's Watch.
This raises the question, if the CotF wanted humans to defeat the Others, why didn't they help the humans during the Long Night (at least, prior to the Last Hero's involvement)? Well, once again, we need to consider the psychology of the CotF. We know the CotF are willing to fight incredibly bloody wars, as they did against the First Men, but we also know that they won't keep fighting in a hopeless circumstance simply to spite their enemy, in the way that humans will. In situations where they are faced with assured destruction, they react with sad acceptance, not defiance. The fact that the CotF didn't initially participate in the war against the Others during the Long Night indicates that they must have viewed that war as hopeless. The Others were sweeping south, massacring humans, converting their boys into more Others and raising the rest as wights, constantly growing stronger; the CotF must have concluded that there was nothing they could do, no way to survive the Long Night. They didn't just roll over and die, but they weren't about to fight the Others when they had no chance of success. The CotF most likely hid, guarding themselves with magic, waiting to die a slow death—just like they're doing today.
Fortunately for the CotF, the Long Night did not end in their extinction. As I argued in my second post, Azor Ahai negotiated a peace treaty that ended the Long Night. But, as part of that peace treaty, the Others received a queen, the first female member of their species (whom I've been referring to as the Night's Queen). This allowed the Others to reproduce sexually, as opposed to their earlier method of kidnapping human children, and as a result the Others' population would have begun increasing dramatically following the Long Night. So, on the one hand, the Others were no longer benefitting from the Long Night, meaning they were more vulnerable than they had been prior to the peace treaty. But, at the same time, the Others were growing more powerful, as their population rose. For the first time since the Long Night began, the CotF could now hope for victory in a war with them and the humans on one side and the Others on the other side, but they had a very narrow window in which to act, before the Others became too powerful. That's why they only began making moves against the Others after the Long Night; during the Long Night the Others were too strong to be realistically opposed, and before the Long Night the Others weren't seen as a significant threat. Once the Long Night ended, however, the CotF got to work, by helping to make the Horn of Winter and by providing the Night's Watch with obsidian.

Things change

The above description probably makes it seem like the CotF were motivated to provoke a new war against the Others out of self-preservation, and there may well be some truth in that. The Others, with their new queen, were a rising power, and they still probably harbored a vendetta against the CotF. If the new war against the Others resulted in the Others' extinction, that would obviously guarantee the CotF's safety from them; if the war resulted in the Night's Queen being killed or captured (which I argued is what happened), that would remove the Others' status as a rising power. So, if the CotF were acting out of self-preservation, their plan seems to have been both well motivated and reasonably successful.
But, while the CotF might have successfully averted the risk posed by the Others, they failed to do the same with the humans. Leaf, and presumably the other CotF, fully recognize that humanity's expansion is going to drive them extinct. This has massive implications for the CotF's goals and motivations. The fact that the CotF are aware of and resigned to their inevitable extinction means that self-preservation is no longer a concern for them. They might have been motivated by self-preservation following the end of the Long Night, but not anymore. Whatever the CotF are doing nowadays, they're doing it because there's something they want to accomplish before they vanish as a species. And I do think that the CotF are trying to accomplish something, partly because characters that don't want anything are boring, and partly because Bloodraven is clearly up to something, and the CotF are supporting him. So, if they're not motivated by self-preservation, what are the CotF trying to do?
A common idea I've heard is that Bloodraven and the CotF want to prevent the Others from destroying the world in a second Long Night. I think there's an element of truth to this (especially considering the lengths the CotF have already gone to to oppose the Others), but I don't think it's the whole story. Consider this: if the CotF want to prevent the Others from conquering Westeros, but they're not motivated by self-preservation, then they must be motivated by some combination of altruism and guilt. They created the Others, then the Others got out of hand, to the point where they threatened all of Westeros, and now the CotF feel responsible for making sure they don't do that again. That's reasonable, even noble, but it can't be limited to merely defeating the Others in this latest confrontation. If all that comes of this current conflict with the Others is that the Others are prevented from conquering Westeros, then who's to say that the Others won't try to conquer Westeros a third time in another 8,000 years? And by the time that happens, the CotF will be extinct, so they won't be around to help with that conflict. Simply defeating the Others and thwarting their plans would be a temporary solution to a permanent problem, and, with the CotF facing their own extinction, they would see now as a time for permanent solutions. And when the problem in question is the existence of the Others, there can be only one solution: The CotF want to wipe out the Others completely. I suspect they wanted this ever since the Long Night; they probably see it as cleaning up after their mess. Now, with their extinction looming, that plan to genocide the Others has been made a priority.
I know that my logic has involved jumping around in time a lot, so, as a summary, let me present this handy timeline of the CotF's thoughts on the Others:

• During the war between the CotF and the First Men: "We need the Others to win this war."
• After the Pact was forged: Either "We may not be at war anymore, but we need to keep the Others as our slave soldiers, just in case the humans break the Pact," or "We don't need the Others anymore now that we have the Pact. I'm sure the handful of free Others in the Lands of Always Winter won't be a problem."
• During the Long Night: "The Others are going to drive both us and the First Men to extinction, but there's nothing we can do about it. This sucks."
• After the Long Night: "The Others are vulnerable, but they won't be for long. They're a danger to both us and the humans, and they're our fault. We need to act fast to destroy them, while we still can. That means we need to get the humans and the Others to start fighting again, and then we can help the humans win that war."
• After the Night's Queen was taken prisoner: "This isn't ideal, but the Others are no longer a rising power without their queen, so we can leave well enough alone."
• After it became clear that the CotF were going extinct: "The Others are unable to act against the humans for now, but there's no guarantee that that will last, and we won't be around to oppose the Others forever. We need to genocide the Others, while we're still around to do so."

I want to comment on an interesting theme here. You may notice a certain paternalism in the CotF's attitudes toward humans. This has already demonstrated in the books:

"Two hundred years?" said Meera.
The child smiled. “Men, they are the children.” (ADWD, Bran II)

It has often been observed that the Others, as an existential threat that can only be dealt with if humanity puts away its petty political squabbles, serve as a metaphor for climate change. In this metaphor, the CotF are the older generations that caused climate change in the first place and now are dying off for unrelated reasons. The CotF's behavior can then be seen as an aspirational model for how older generations should behave with regards climate change. Rather than saying, "Fuck it, I'll be dead, so it's not my problem," they ought to say, "I'm partly responsible for this, so I need to fix it, and the fact that I won't be around that much longer only means I need to work harder to fix it while I still can." Sadly, the CotF only behave the way they do because of their inhuman psychology, which points to the fact that it was never realistic to hope that older generations would behave this way in real life. I doubt this theme is intentional; Martin seems to have originally not seen the Others as a climate change metaphor, although he's since come around to the idea. Still, I think it's a neat connection.

It was Bloodraven all along

If the CotF really want to wipe out the Others, then the current situation at Winterfell must seem perfect for them. I argued in my last post that the events of the series have left Winterfell vulnerable, and the Others are now planning a rescue mission to extract their queen from the Winterfell crypts. With their queen no longer held captive, there will be nothing preventing war between humans and Others (and, after the humans kept the Night's Queen imprisoned for thousands of years, the Others will definitely have cause for war), and this war will happen while the CotF are still around to support the humans. Better still, humanity has dragons again, which will surely be useful against the Others. Everything seems to be going swimmingly for the CotF's plan to provoke a war of extermination against the Others, which raises an obvious question: did the CotF cause the current situation?
To grossly oversimplify a complex series of events, Winterfell's vulnerability can be traced back to two events:

• Ned going to King's Landing, and subsequently getting beheaded. This caused all of the Starks except for Bran and Rickon to leave Winterfell, and it caused the Northern army to march south, leaving Winterfell vulnerable to…
• Theon capturing Winterfell, and subsequently losing it to Ramsay. This physically damaged Winterfell, it caused Bran and Rickon to leave, and it meant that Winterfell was now under Bolton control, which put it at the center of both Stannis's war and the various Northern intrigues.

As it happens, there's evidence that Bloodraven played a part in both of these events. First, Bloodraven was probably responsible for sending the direwolves to the Stark children (link to a series of posts by JoeMagician that lays out this argument, among other claims), and these direwolves shaped the events that led to Ned's beheading. Summer killed Bran's assassin before he could murder Bran, but also before he could be interrogated by the Starks; as a result, Catelyn acquired the Valyrian steel dagger, but she didn't know who sent the assassin. Littlefinger took advantage of this to manipulate the Starks. Meanwhile, the Nymeria/Lady incident deepened tensions between the Starks and the Lannisters. I'm not saying that the direwolves exist solely for the purpose of getting Ned's beheaded, but they did contribute to his beheading, by providing Littlefinger with a means of manipulating the Starks and by further souring relations between Ned and Cersei.
More significantly, Bloodraven removed Bran's memory of Jaime pushing him from the tower:

Bran was staring at his arms, his legs. He was so skinny, just skin stretched taut over bones. Had he always been so thin? He tried to remember. A face swam up at him out of the grey mist, shining with light, golden. "The things I do for love," it said.
Bran screamed.
The crow took to the air, cawing. Not that, it shrieked at him. Forget that, you do not need it now, put it aside, put it away. It landed on Bran’s shoulder, and pecked at him, and the shining golden face was gone. (AGOT, Bran III)

If Bran had kept that memory, then he presumably would have woken up and told someone, "Jaime Lannister pushed me out of the tower, after I saw him wrestling naked with Queen Cersei." How exactly this would have changed the events of the book is a matter of fanfic, but, with eye-witness evidence of Jaime and Cersei committing incest and attempted murder, it's very easy to see things going poorly for the Lannisters. Even Cersei recognized how difficult of a situation that would have been to navigate:

If truth be told, Jaime had come to rue heaving Brandon Stark out that window. Cersei had given him no end of grief afterward, when the boy refused to die. "He was seven, Jaime," she’d berated him. "Even if he understood what he saw, we should have been able to frighten him into silence."
"I didn’t think you’d want—"
"You never think. If the boy should wake and tell his father what he saw—"
"If if if." He had pulled her into his lap. “If he wakes we’ll say he was dreaming, we’ll call him a liar, and should worse come to worst I’ll kill Ned Stark."
"And then what do you imagine Robert will do?" (ASOS, Jaime I)

Had Bran kept his memory of Jaime pushing him out of the window, then it likely would have been Cersei and Jaime's downfall, and that means Ned wouldn't have lost his head.
Later, when Theon takes Winterfell, he wakes up suddenly in the middle of the night, and he gets the feeling that someone was responsible for waking him:

One moment he was asleep; the next, awake.
Kyra nestled against him, one arm draped lightly over his, her breasts brushing his back. He could hear her breathing, soft and steady. The sheet was tangled about them. It was the black of night. The bedchamber was dark and still.
What is it? Did I hear something? Someone?
Wind sighed faintly against the shutters. Somewhere, far off, he heard the yowl of a cat in heat. Nothing else. Sleep, Greyjoy, he told himself. The castle is quiet, and you have guards posted. At your door, at the gates, on the armory.
He might have put it down to a bad dream, but he did not remember dreaming. (ACOK, Theon IV)

This was the chapter where Bran and company "escape," and Theon's primary emotions throughout the chapter are anxiety and desperation. Those feelings build over the course of the day, as Theon tries and fails to find Bran and Rickon, eventually consuming him to the point where he does something stupid.

"Joseth has the right of it," said Maester Luwin. "Groping through the woods by torchlight will avail us nothing."
Theon could taste bile at the back of his throat, and his stomach was a nest of snakes twining and snapping at each other. If he crept back to Winterfell empty-handed, he might as well dress in motley henceforth and wear a pointed hat; the whole north would know him for a fool. And when my father hears, and Asha …
"M’lord prince." Reek urged his horse near. (ACOK, Theon IV)

Theon woke up in the middle of the night with a sense that something was off, and then he had plenty of time to stew in his anxiety. Were it not for that, he might not have descended to the point where killing the miller's boys seemed like a good idea. Therefore, the hint that someone was responsible for waking him up is interesting; maybe Bloodraven used his psychic tree powers to wake Theon? The passage mentions the "sigh" of wind—a notably anthropomorphic phrasing—and we know that, when Bran tried to communicate with Ned in the past, it sounded like wind to him; maybe Bloodraven can do something similar, sans time travel? There's nothing explicitly pointing to Bloodraven, but there is evidence that he's messing with Theon's emotions in his next chapter:

The sky was a gloom of cloud, the woods dead and frozen. Roots grabbed at Theon’s feet as he ran, and bare branches lashed his face, leaving thin stripes of blood across his cheeks. He crashed through heedless, breathless, icicles flying to pieces before him. Mercy, he sobbed. From behind came a shuddering howl that curdled his blood. Mercy, mercy. When he glanced back over his shoulder he saw them coming, great wolves the size of horses with the heads of small children. Oh, mercy, mercy. Blood dripped from their mouths black as pitch, burning holes in the snow where it fell. Every stride brought them closer. Theon tried to run faster, but his legs would not obey. The trees all had faces, and they were laughing at him, laughing, and the howl came again. He could smell the hot breath of the beasts behind him, a stink of brimstone and corruption. They’re dead, dead, I saw them killed, he tried to shout, I saw their heads dipped in tar, but when he opened his mouth only a moan emerged, and then something touched him and he whirled, shouting … (ACOK, Theon V)

Theon feels guilty for faking Bran and Rickon's death, and he's afraid for his future; that guilt and fear would have existed in him no matter what, but these dreams amplify those feelings, and the presence of weirwood trees suggests that Bloodraven is actively sending them to Theon. After all, none of Theon's experiences have involved a weirwood in any significant capacity, so this wasn't a native element of his dream, and Bran often has dreams about a weirwood that are implied to be sent by Bloodraven. Theon's fear and his attempts to rationalize his guilt drive him to cling desperately to his power and authority:

"Your prize will be the doom of you. Krakens rise from the sea, Theon, or did you forget that during your years among the wolves? Our strength is in our longships. My wooden pisspot sits close enough to the sea for supplies and fresh men to reach me whenever they are needful. But Winterfell is hundreds of leagues inland, ringed by woods, hills, and hostile holdfasts and castles. And every man in a thousand leagues is your enemy now, make no mistake. You made certain of that when you mounted those heads on your gatehouse." Asha shook her head. "How could you be such a bloody fool? Children …"
"They defied me!" he shouted in her face. "And it was blood for blood besides, two sons of Eddard Stark to pay for Rodrik and Maron." The words tumbled out heedlessly, but Theon knew at once that his father would approve. "I’ve laid my brothers’ ghosts to rest." (ACOK, Theon V)

All of this causes Theon to reject Asha's offer to leave Winterfell for Deepwood Motte, which results in Ramsay sacking Winterfell. So, to summarize, Bloodraven provided the Lannisters with advantages so that they would triumph in their intrigues against Ned, and he psychologically manipulated Theon so that he would lose Winterfell to Ramsay. Bloodraven has actively worked to create the circumstances that have left Winterfell vulnerable, so that the Others will be able to rescue their queen and begin a new war against the humans. I don't want to fall into the trap of claiming that Bloodraven was responsible for everything; I think that most events in the story happened without his direct interference. But, thanks to his greensight giving him glimpses of the future, Bloodraven has found a few places where just a small nudge can result in things going the way he wants them to.
Of course, putting Winterfell in a vulnerable position only matters if the Others know about that vulnerability. Bloodraven must have some communication with the Others. I'm not sure what this communication looks like; if the Others can dream, then it might just mean sending them green dreams prophesying Winterfell's coming vulnerability. Alternatively, Bloodraven might be communicating with them directly by skinchanging into a raven. Maybe he's posing as a human traitor, willing to sell out the humans and the CotF, a kind of second Night's King? This is definitely the biggest missing piece in my theory, but I don't think it's too outlandish to posit Bloodraven has some means of getting information to the Others, and that he's thereby clued the Others in on Winterfell's coming vulnerability.

A politically useful apocalypse

I've talked a lot about the CotF's motivations, but not at all about Bloodraven's, so let's do that now. I'd recommend you read this excellent series of posts on Bloodraven, which I'll be drawing from heavily. Prior to becoming the Last Greenseer, Bloodraven was primarily occupied with the Blackfyres. He played a crucial role in ending the First Blackfyre Rebellion, including but not limited to killing Daemon Blackfyre and his eldest two sons, and since then he went to every effort to foil future Blackfyre attempts to claim the Iron Throne. Some people have speculated that Bloodraven did so out of duty and a desire to keep the realm stable, but this doesn't hold up. Following Maekar I's death, a Great Council was held to determine the succession, and Bloodraven invited and then immediately killed Aenys Blackfyre. Bloodraven later claimed that this was for the good of the realm, but… how? If the Great Council had selected Aenys as the next king, the crown would have passed to him just as peacefully and rightfully as it ended up passing to Aegon V. If Bloodraven was truly motivated by duty and a desire for peace, he would have had no reason to kill Aenys. The only explanation for Bloodraven's actions is that he genuinely did not want a Blackfyre to take the throne, no matter the circumstances surrounding their accession. In fact, his anti-Blackfyre obsession was so intense that he ignored the devastation caused by Dagon Greyjoy, because addressing it would leave the throne vulnerable to the Blackfyres:

"Myself, I blame Bloodraven," Ser Kyle went on. "He is the King's Hand, yet he does nothing, whilst the krakens spread flame and terror up and down the sunset sea."
Ser Maynard gave a shrug. "His eye is fixed on Tyrosh, where Bittersteel sits in exile, plotting with the sons of Daemon Blackfyre. So he keeps the king's ships close at hand, lest they attempt to cross." (The Mystery Knight)

It's important to note that Maynard Plumm was probably a glamored Bloodraven, so this isn't mere speculation; this is Bloodraven telling us his motivation. By all accounts, Bloodraven's tenure as Hand was an awful time for Westeros, where law and order broke down and few people respected the king. The point is, Bloodraven was not a noble man fighting against a beloved brother because it was the right thing to do. Bloodraven was a Targaryen uber-loyalist, who would gladly see the realm burn, so long as a Targaryen remained on the throne. And he appears to have retained that loyalty, decades later. Bloodraven is likely in control of Mormont's raven (see the series of posts I linked earlier), and in raven form Bloodraven hints fairly clearly about wanting Jon to be king:

"Aemon knew, and rightly, that if he remained at court those who disliked his brother’s rule would seek to use him, so he came to the Wall. And here he has remained, while his brother and his brother’s son and his son each reigned and died in turn, until Jaime Lannister put an end to the line of the Dragonkings."
"King," croaked the raven. The bird appeared across the solar to land on Mormont’s shoulder. "King," it said again, strutting back and forth. (ACOK, Jon I)

Something similar happens in ADWD, but what's interesting about this instance of the raven calling Jon king is that it happens immediately after Mormont claims that the Targaryen line has ended. This suggests that this is more than just a prophetic statement of fact; this is a profession of loyalty. Jon is the rightful Targaryen king, and he has Bloodraven's support.
Given his undying Targaryen loyalty, Bloodraven must be psyched about the coming war between the humans and the Others. Daenerys is coming with three dragons, which will be humanity's best hope for defeating the Others; Westeros will naturally rally behind Daenerys, solidifying her rule. Moreover, dragons will be seen as the saviors of Westeros, rather than as dangerous weapons. If Marwyn was right that the maesters killed the dragons, then this would prevent a similar conspiracy from arising and driving the dragons back into extinction, since the dragons would now be seen as necessary for Westeros's security against the forces of evil. So while Bloodraven wants to provoke a war between humans and Others, just like the CotF do, he wants this for a different reason than they do; Bloodraven wants to use the Others to bring about a lasting Targaryen restoration.

Continued in comments